Hellobee Boards

This is why I can't hire a nanny.. I have trust issues. Wish everyone was like you!

@Coco Bee: yeah it makes me mad when I see nannies not paying attention to their kids and on the phone. They have to be alert and looking out for the child's safety.

I was a nanny to three young kids one summer and it was before cell phones, but I can't even fathom having time to be on the phone while they're awake. They needed constant attention and monitoring. I have no issues with nanny cams for our future LO's either. I mean it's your kids we're talking about, not the plants you know?

i'm going to chime in from the other side- i'm a nanny and i'm posting this from... wait for it... work! it's naptime, the laundry is in the dryer, dinner is marinating, i just found a fizzing side walk chalk project on pinterest to do this afternoon (totally excited about it!) & i guess i'm not sure what people imagine i'd be doing right now.

there are also awake times when i'm not actively engaged in an activity with the kids. when adults are constantly playing with children, they aren't allowing them to be as independent and creative as they could be without the adult participating. i def play with the kids and do LOTS of activities, go on lots of field trips and spend tons of time snuggling, but if i spent every moment of the 62 hours i'm working this week giving my undivided attention to my work LOs, they wouldn't learn how to entertain themselves and i'd be hindering their creativity & independence. i'll always offer an activity for them if i'm occupied- giving a big bowl with some soapy water, a sponge and play kitchen items while i wash dishes/clean up, but i'm fine with them playing whatever for a bit.

i also avoid hovering. kids with nannies that hover are just like kids with parents that hover. i am always aware of what's going on, but if older kids are having a disagreement, i let them try to work it out and only intervene if i think it's necessary. after we will talk about what happened, how they handled it and what could be done in the future, but they need to learn conflict resolution skills.

in the past i've even been browsing on my phone while older kids played at a playground- especially if certain moms were around! you'd be surprised how many moms ask nannies about private family things regarding the families they work for or they have weird ideas about nannies and want to talk to nannies about 'what it's really like'. many feel like it's totally fine to say or ask inappropriate things, i've been told more times than i can count (in front of my work LOs!!), 'why do people have kids if they don't even want to be with them', and 'i'd never hire you as a nanny, my husband would enjoy that way too much', 'have you ever had a boss try to sleep with you?' all sorts of nasty things as soon as the word 'nanny' comes out, not always, but more than you'd think!

i'd never have a nanny, i'm way too jealous. i wouldn't be able to have my kids bonding with someone in that way without resenting them- i'm not proud of it, but that's how i feel. i'd have a babysitter and for something like that where they'd be around for <20 hours a week, i'd expect them to be actively engaged with the kids the whole time. i guess my point is, it's between parents and caregivers what their goals are and if all parties are comfortable with what's taking place and no one is being put in an unsafe situation (texting while driving, leaving children alone near water, etc), then it's no one else's place to say anything. people have different ideas about parenting and people have different ideas about the way they want their caregiver caring for their children, to each his own.

@mrs. bird: you sound like a great nanny! The nannies I tried could barely multi-task and do anything. The main problem was that they couldn't get DD to sleep and she was only a few months old. So if they couldn't get her to sleep then they didn't have time to cook, clean, or do laundry. Nothing. So I definitely didn't want them on the phone if they could barely do anything else!