So my 5 yr old has me at my wits end. This is all he will currently eat: milk, pancakes, cereal, chicken noodle soup without the chicken, crackers, beef jerky, and lettuce. That's it. He will literally not eat, only drink milk, until I give in and let him eat cereal and pancakes for dinner. I'm can't take it anymore. How can we fix this? He has to start eating! He's skinny and I'm worried about his health
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I would really encourage you to read Ellyn Satter's book. The short version is, with the exception of a few specific medical diagnoses, children will not starve themselves. Offer water instead of milk and he will eat. You choose what is served, when meals happen, and where they happen. He chooses whether he will eat, and how much. But the book tells you how to actually do that.
OF COURSE if you suspect sensory or medical issues see your pediatrician first! But if this is just pickiness run wild, the division of responsibility approach works. If you go this route, remind yourself that you are not making him hungry, he is choosing to be hungry. He will end up with a well rounded diet and be healthier in the long run if he learns he cannot manipulate you into making pancakes. Best of luck! -
Sounds like my son. Are there any sensory things going on?
For comparison, my son's food list is: chicken nuggets, mac and cheese (different kinds are acceptable), cheerios with milk, crackers with peanut butter, nutrigrain cereal bars, bread or bagels with cream cheese, milk, juice, yogurt and anything chocolate. He's labelled severe food aversion.
There are something like 6 categories of food texture and if a child has less than 5 things that they will eat in each category, they're severe. If they have 5, it's moderate.
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Sounds like my son as well. He has sensory processing issues. At 2, he would only eat 5-10 foods, and they were all from the same food group. I took him to therapy and they worked with him to desensitize him a bit. He still isn't a foodie or anything, but we can get him to try things now that he definitely wouldn't have before. The most annoying part of the whole thing - at therapy, they did the same exact things I was doing at home. He just responded better to a stranger than his own mom lol
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I tried today at dinner to make him take one bite of the white rice and chicken I made before I made him whatever he wanted- food that he used to eat- and he refused. He cried for an hour then went to bed. He flat out refused to eat anything. He wouldn't even look at the bowl.
I talked to him several times during the day explaining that he needs to try one bite of food at dinner so he would be prepared, but he still had a meltdown. I can't do this everyday. Food that he used to eat makes him gag and he complains about food smelling and refuses to come in the kitchen sometimes.
I don't know if he has sensory issues. He is irrationally scared of thunderstorms and alarms. He had a check up the 15th and I think I need to ask our pediatrician for help
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@glitterboots: I mentioned in my post above that my son has sensory issues. They effect every child differently. But I will say, my son is irrationally afraid of alarms as well. You also mentioned he complains about the smell of the food - that could also be a sensory thing. Unfortunately, talking about it with him can make it worse (it may be making him even more anxious about eating). We found that letting DS take a special toy to the table with him has lessened his anxiety. We also try and get him to play with the food (even touching it can help desensitize) when he doesn't want to eat. There is so much I learned in 24 weeks of feeding therapy for him. Let me know if you want to know more. Hopefully it's just a phase, but it does sound like some sensory issues may be at play.
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