Anyone else’s 5 y/o always crying? I feel like she’s an emotional wreck. She’s either crying or whining or talking super rudely. If I ask her to talk politely she just breaks down in tears. I’m getting a lot of the “You’re the worst mom ever!” And “You want me to die!” (that one is usually in response to something like me sayin “If you want something, you need to ask more politely by saying ‘mama can I please...’”). When does it end?!
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Following. My almost-five year old is an emotional disaster - everything either makes him super defensive and rude or makes him cry. It’s not my favourite phase. We have a lot of “why do I always have to do everything?!?!”
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For us, this type of behavior is tied to school. There seem to be a lot of friend issues. So-and-so wanted to play with someone else. So-and-so wouldn't let me in the house. So-and-so said I was dirty.
This year (K) has been particularly hard with all that. She internalizes whatever happens and then comes home a wreck. I can only sometimes get the explanation from her later after she's calm and right before she falls asleep.
I think she's just learning how to process all the peer interaction. Despite her being in daycare, something seems to have changed this year.
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Oh, so this is normal? My barely six year old is either rude or whiny most of the time, and I was sure it's something I've done wrong.
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@shabang: I’ll have to prod her a little more on this. She is very hard on herself about school and it’s exacerbated by being the youngest in the class. She has also had some friend troubles.
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Kinder is rough!! I think it’s a rough transition for most kids - they’re exhausted, the social pressures, let alone if they struggle with sitting in class/behavior or the material. My oldest is in 1st now and it’s a big improvement for most kids as far as I can tell. They just grow into it. In kinder we had to pretty much do nothing after school except play, have dinner at 5 and aim for bed at 7 (I realize not possible for everyone).
Our school does something where dads can come volunteer for the whole day. DH was super scarred by the whole thing and how much all the kids cried and struggled with behavior! I think modern kinder really asks too much of them. -
@Becky: ack this sounds so hard. How is she sleeping? I find my kid has no emotional control when he's even slightly tired.
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Yep! My kid is sooooooo emotional!!!! And it always comes out of nowhere!! It started right around when he started Kindergarten and it has gotten a little better, but definitely still happens! I'm constantly rolling my eyes (when he can't see me) at the DRAMA.
Yesterday, he was hiding from me under the bed, and I just said to Logan "Where's your brother?" and Logan replies "Under the bed" and Xander just BURSTS INTO TEARS and cries for like 10 minutes straight.
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My almost 5.5 yo has always been high strung and continues to be very emotional. Hers comes out as defiance a lot, or total angry meltdowns- which thank god are starting to become less frequent. We went through a phase of “yore ruining my life” and “I hate you”, now it’s more “bad stupid mommy/ daddy”. Or she will be super bratty and I threaten a consequence (If you can’t stop and listen, I can’t take you swimming because it’s not safe to bring someone swimming when I can’t trust they will listen to me), she will start sobbing about missing swimming, even though I haven’t said we aren’t going, just that she needs to listen or we won’t.
It’s great. Super awesome. She would have started K this year but we held her for a year to let her mature, so I think t helps that her jr k class only has ten kids.
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Another crying Kindergartener over here. It seems like it got worse after Thanksgiving.
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@Foodnerd81 @adira The struggle is real! Mine does that whole freaking out about not getting to do something I didn’t even take away yet too. She’s also SO literal and always correcting me which drives me up the wall. I’ve given up arguing and just had to tell my husband to do the same today after she took his “Where’s the remote?” For “You took the remote” and epic tears ensued. Maybe if he regularly accused her of doing things it would be different but we have literally never accused her of doing something she didn’t so idk where it’s coming from.
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@Mama Bird: I am also relieved to hear it's not just us! Whiny, rude and crying is at least 30% of the time we have together. He's 6.
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@shabang @Becky we have totally had this as well with DS who started kinder this year. Some days are ok but other days are just a freakin nightmare with him. At parent teacher meetings we asked if he has been having emotional meltdowns or any issues and they were shocked that we asked as he seems great at school. But the teacher did say a lot of the kids hold it together at school and then lash out/meltdown at home where they are comfortable and that it’s normal developmentally and they should grow out of it eventually. Regardless, this has been our toughest year yet for his behaviour and emotions.
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We saw this behavior in Sept right when our newly turned 5yo started K. I just said to my husband that he seems to have finally transitioned in late Dec. Hang in there. I feel like it is pretty normal.
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Another crying kinder here. He cries sooo easily and it is hard!
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Another emotional kindergartener here. I thought we had turned a corner in November, but she came unglued again over the winter break. Lots of whining, lots of attitude, lots of need for physical touch and attention. Like basically an endless need for hugs and touches and reassurance. I think part of it is that she was still napping at daycare until she went to K, and I can tell she is just exhausted by the end of the day.
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This stage kind of sucks but this thread has really made me feel better, I’m glad it’s not just my kid!
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@erinbaderin: Exactly—I feel bad everyone is going through it but I’m relieved it’s not just me!
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Glad it’s not just mine haha. He’s almost 5. School exhausts him so he’s a hot mess. He was such a dream over Christmas break and back to school this week and the sass is back. So many break downs
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My kinder kid keeps it together really well during school and is ok until close to bed time, then if she gets even a little bit tired she completely explodes. Like earth shaking stuff. Once a week we stay up late for church and she is fine until the minute we set foot in the car and then she doesn’t stop sobbing until she’s home asleep. There never seems to be a real cause and mostly it seems like she’s looking for a reason to fight.
My favorite was when we were driving home from church and she’s quiet for a minute like she’s trying to think of something and then she YELLS ‘’ARE YOU NEVER GOING TO TAKE ME TO THE DENTIST AGAIN?!?’’ Well it turns out DH and I had recently had dentist appointments (we’re on a totally different schedule than the kids) and DD thought DS had gone too. Totally random, totally small, and led to the most epic breakdown.
This thread make sure me feel a bit better though!
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I’m not sure if this thread makes me feel better or worse...Better because I’m glad my DD isn’t the only whiny, rude, emotional wreck out there. Worse because she is still in pre-K (she just turned 5 and the cutoff here is 8/31) and I’m not sure I can handle next year being MORE difficult! She is just dead set on having her own way ALL THE TIME and flips out when she can’t. Combined with her inability to ever hear anything we’re asking/telling her to do, we’ve had some hard days lately. DH has gotten super frazzled by it so his patience with her antics is really thin, which doesn’t help matters. I feel like I spend half my time trying to mediate between the two of them. I was really hoping it would get better soon...sigh.
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@JCCovi: ok the dentist thing definitely made me laugh. My daughter also sometimes seems to just be thinking about something to get upset about, just because. Last night at dinner my 3 yo noticed andgoes “why you mad?” 5 yo launches into a story about her friend yelling at her at lunch and calling her disgusting, all upset, then suddenly smiles and goes, in just joking, that didn’t happen! What?? Why were you almost in tears?
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@JCCovi: The dentist type situation is fairly common here too. I feel like my DD sounds like all of your kids in terms of her irrationality and emotional instability so I feel so much better!
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Welp, my son is like this at 3.5 and this morning I cried all the way to work because I was so overwhelmed with him constantly crying and being hysterical and wondering when it will get better... annnd it sounds like it's gonna get worse.
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For me at 5 I think they are old enough to behave better. When my daughter was 5 she knew that crying for no reason would result inn some form of negative repercussion and no rude talking back allowed. She would lose privileges, toys or tv time and have to earn it back with good behavior.
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@Mrsbells: DD definitely loses privileges or faces other negative consequences, but she’s still moody, sassy, and overly emotional the next time around. It doesn’t seem to sink in. 🙄
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@PurplePeony: oh yes definitely the sass is there for sure. DD is 6 now and DS1 is 2 and I honestly feel like I have teenagers already
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This evening my son burst into tears and yelled “I hate my life!” and when I asked why he wept “I just wish I could be a cheetah!” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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