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@Jess1483: Yes, very much so. I had a heck of a time last week between an announcement, OB appt/labs, a discussion with my insurance company and RE's office...and waiting...lots and lots of waiting. Yuck. Sending
!
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@simplyfelicity: So happy you're back, chick. x
@Jess1483: Big hugs. Announcements left, right & centre here. Dying a bit each time.
We had to sit and smile through a whole bunch of relatives cheering on my Bro/SIL's pregnancy - as they should - but it was pretty bloody hard. One Aunty knows we lost the baby, so she was amazing support today. Thank goodness for her!
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@ValentineMommy: I am so sorry to hear of the death of your birth father. You have so much going on, I really hope you will feel some peace soon.
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I wrote my little one a letter today. I put together a shadow box with some sweet things, and left a sealed letter in there as well. It was so, so hard, but it felt good to do. I've spoken many of those things out loud, but there's something different about writing them down. It's been on my mind to do it, and I finally had the chance today. It's closing a door a bit, though, and I'm not sure I'm ready.
I'm feeling rambly today... -
@Jess1483: Many hugs. I wrote one for my April loss and I don't feel ready this time, somehow. Maybe because it was a blighted ovum it feels different. I am not sure. I am glad you did something to bring yourself peace...you so deserve it.
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@jaguar: That just plain sucks. I am sorry you experienced that but am glad someone showed you kindness.
A coworker got me flowers...it was very sweet and surprising. I feel so invisible because of this. A "friend" of mine who also had a loss in April got pregnant the second time a few weeks after me. She knows how hard I am struggling and, even the night before a work gathering, I told her how it is hard to breathe some days. At the work gathering, she announced to someone I was talking to and modeled her maternity clothes and went on about her due date... she knows my heart is broken but completely steam rolled that. I am not saying she shouldn't be happy or she shouldn't announce, but she should know not to announce in front of a woman who is still bleeding from her pregnancy. I excused myself after an appropriate time, went in the bathroom and just cried. It's one thing when people say the "wrong" thing, like a canned platitude that gives no comfort and another when someone doesn't care about your feelings. Anyway, I decided that friendship is done.
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@simplyfelicity: Ugh. I'm so sorry. I have to wonder if I've said/done the wrong thing before experiencing a mc myself, but for her to have experienced a loss and still acted like that? That's a total disregard for your feelings. I'm so sorry. You are being so strong. Prayers for you.
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@Jess1483: We'll do the same, it's a lovely idea.
@simplyfelicity: That is so rude. My SIL has been really nice, but she made a comment the other day about how 'they need to be happy for them' - that rubbed me the wrong way. Of course you are allowed to be happy, OF COURSE, but a little sensitivity goes a long way.
I think we're 99% sure on a name for our little boy. Can't believe it's almost been a month since I lost him. And no cycle in sight, as per usual.
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@Jess1483: I wonder the same thing. I am sure I have said some sort of empty platitude but I can't imagine more than that.
@jaguar: Ummmm...why even say a comment like that? The problem isn't that you aren't happy for others but you are hurting. Perspective changes so much. -
@simplyfelicity: Yep, I know! Really frustrated me.
We got mail this morning with the genetic test results. We knew already of course, but just seeing it on paper... man.
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Oh good, another royal baby. Front page news for the next XXX amount of months, when I should have been pregnant.
#bitterandsadinfertile
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@jaguar: Praying for your remaining embryo!!
@MaryM: I'm sorry you're going through a tough time. I keep imagining my next birthday (2 weeks after my EDD) and how sucky that's going to be. Hugs!
@simplyfelicity: I'm so glad you're back. You were greatly missed. We're always here for your love and support Thank you for your condolences - it's been a rough time, for sure. I'm praying the next news I have it GOOD news. I think I'm long overdue. I'm sorry about your "friend" - it's so hard when someone acts like that. People can be so stupid and insensitive.
@Jess1483: Every announcement I hear (and there have been many), is like another punch to the gut. I thought it would get easier, but I think until I am pregnant again with a sticky babe, it won't be any better. I feel your pain -
@jaguar: Yep. Saw that this morning. Was bitter.
My appointment is today. I'm interested to see what my doc says. And also to talk to her because we tried to DTD last night for the first time and holy shit, that HURT! So there's something weird going on. Grrr... Even that's messed up now?
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@jaguar: Ugh, I saw that this morning and said the same thing to my mom. I better get preg soon, or I'm going to lose my mind.
Weekend was hard, with bio-dad's funeral, but I'm glad that I went and that it's over. In the meantime, I got a positive OPK yesterday! Fingers crossed that this is almost over and I can officially move on.
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@Jess1483: Yeaaaaa.....DTD felt basically like pp DTD for the first few times for me too. It was NOT pleasant at all. I promise it will get better though. Give it some time (and lube lol)
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@ValentineMommy: I had a lot of issues PP, but at least I had a baby (and was so tired I didn't really want to anyway...), and had to take topical estrogen for awhile. I imagine the problem has returned, although I thought it was nursing-related.
Sigh. -
@Jess1483: I was shocked honestly, that it felt so much like it did pp. I had no idea that would happen without having given birth. Also, I got PPA again....though that doesn't surprise me as much
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Hey girls! Work is killing me today, but thought I'd check in during my lunch break.
@Jess1483: I've never had a child so I can't compare post-MC to PP...but the first few times DH and I tried post-MC it was like my cervix was on fire.
@simplyfelicity: You were missed
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I had my appointment and it went well. OB was very supportive of trying after my first AF if we were ready. Also discussed options from "very monitored (HCG levels, weekly ultrasounds after it hits 1500 for awhile)" to "treat like you've never had a miscarriage (wait for 8-week ultrasound)" for monitoring next time I get pregnant. I think we'll take a middle-of-the-road approach, but she said it's fine to change our minds later as well.
I seriously love my OB. I wish we could be friends. Except that that would be really awkward. -
@Jess1483: aww that's awesome. My old doctor was just like that. This new practice is eh. It makes the whole ordeal that much harder because I miss my old doc so much (we moved).
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@ValentineMommy: Awwww... thank you. I missed you guys, too.
I am glad that the hurdle of the funeral is over and that peace can really begin. I felt that way, at least, after my grandfather's tragic death this year.
@MaryM: @Jess1483: @ValentineMommy: Maybe I am total weirdo but sex after D & C wasn't bad at all. We did wait nearly three weeks, so maybe that made a difference? It's nice to get back "in the saddle" again and have that part of my life be normal.
@Jess1483: I am glad you had a good appointment! I am afraid my OB won't be that accomodating...the ones in my area are really hands off and normally don't do your first ultrasound until 12 or 20 weeks. Thanks for the update, too, I just feel so uncertain about the wait time to TTC after D&C. I am not sure what is the real answer and what the OB thinks they are supposed to say for dating and emotional healing.
@MaryM: Thanks! I missed you all, too! My husband must have caught the "bug" that yours did because he totally cleaned the kitchen and is taking me out tonight after I had a breakdown. -
@simplyfelicity: I know how you feel. I went to a work thing, a congrats to a co-workers promotion after work. A friend (we became friends after we both had babies at the same time) brought her son. She was very sweet about it (the opposite of your friend) and once she saw I was there took him out away from the gathering, but I could still see him and it was just so unfair that he was out there running around and I don't have my Lucas. Life is just so unfair.
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@Tidybee: That's how I feel about my OB. Meh...the OB (who has no idea how to do a sonogram) definitely contributed to how awful hearing the bad news was. I really wish I could NTNP next cycle but I think you are probably right about needing to wait longer after a D & C. Anyway, hope you are doing well today.
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@Ms.Badger: Agreed and I am sorry, that must have been so horrible.
I hear you are expecting!!! What wonderful news, I am so happy for you. 
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@simplyfelicity: even though I got pregnant, I can't tell you how nice it was to not be wondering if I was pregnant, what day it was, what dpo I was. It was a really nice break since I've been dealing with pregnancy stuff since January! Such a nice break that I didn't pay any attention and got pregnant hahah.
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@Jess1483: Your OB sounds awesome! I'm glad that she's so sensitive to your needs and so willing to work with you.
@simplyfelicity: First U/S at 12 weeks?!?
Yikes...that would be horrible (for me at least). I hope that your OB will be more understanding when you're pregnant again.@jaguar: @ValentineMommy: Thinking of you both...
@Ms.Badger: I'm so sorry. I hope things get easier soon.
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@Tidybee: That honestly sounds amazing and I would love for it to happen that way but I am not very good at taking a relaxed approach. It's definitely worth a shot. How are you doing?
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@FliegepilzHut: I actually canceled with a different OB because they only do an ultrasound at 20 weeks...so my current one was a serious upgrade. If I get pregnant again I am going to absolutely insist on an early ultrasound. My OB did my D & C, so she knows my history and I am thinking she will allow it.
Anyway, how are you?
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@Tidybee: I'm trying to take a more relaxed approach this time. I'm telling myself I absolutely will not test until a missed period because I think a CP might break me. But I don't really know how to make that happen, because I have, like, no will power.I don't think I'll order cheap tests, because then I'm like "oh, I'm only wasting $.50. In fact, maybe I'll buy super expensive ones so I have some reason not to use them...
@Ms.Badger: I'm so sorry. That would be so hard. I was so thrilled to see your
@simplyfelicity: We waited 3+ weeks and it didn't help. But it's definitely a recurrent problem for me, so not surprising. Bleh.
@Tidybee: Sorry you don't love your OB. At some point in my appt today, my doc said "when you have your new OB" and I was like, wait, hold the phone, WTH?? She just meant they call the appointment "new OB," not that she was leaving, but I told her she was giving me a panic attack. -
@Jess1483: Sounds like your OB is wonderful.
@ValentineMommy: Congrats on a positive OPK. Am jealous! I just want something - an LH surge, an AF, so we can DO SOMETHING. *yargh!*
@FliegepilzHut: How are you, chick? xx
I'm just so sad not to have a baby coming home with us anytime soon. Today is 4 weeks to the day of our d&c.
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@Jess1483: @simplyfelicity: oh I wasn't trying to be relaxed. I thought we were trying to avoid pregnancy this month...that was what was relaxing! But of course as soon as I realized I ovulated...and a little later than I thought, I started counting the days and POAS at 9dpo.
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@ValentineMommy: I totally missed the positive opk. Congrats!
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@Jess1483: I'm so glad your appt went well!!!
@simplyfelicity: I think the 8 weeks of bleeding really did a number on my insides. Thankfully, the uncomfortable "pp" DTD was only a few times and is normal again!
@Ms.Badger: What what what?!?!? I must live under a rock - omg, congratulations!!!! I'm so thrilled for you!
@FliegepilzHut:
Hope you're doing well today!@jaguar: @Jess1483: Thank you! I had 4 positives! 2 yesterday and the day before. We BDed for like 9 days straight and only missed one. This woman is TIRED. I am so extremely nervous and scared in this TWW. There is not even a word for HOW anxious I am lol
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@Tidybee: accidentally relaxed? I like it
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@jaguar: I know, it sucks.
Yesterday, I was at a store and bumped my midsection into the jewelry counter (I am pretty darn clumsy) and I instantly thought "be careful of the baby!" I wish my heart could catch up to my body.
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@simplyfelicity:
I keep thinking about the cute maternity clothes I was going to wear on vacation next week. My heart is never going to catch on, I don't think.
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@ValentineMommy: Vacation sounds great, though! I have my fingers and toes crossed and will say many prayers that this is the month for a sticky baby for you.
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@Jess1483: Thank you! I can't wait for vaca. We leave Saturday. My POAS date is the day we come back, so hopefully being away will make the time go faster. I'm SO tempted to pack some wondfo tests, just in case I can't stand the wait, but don't think I should. I really need more self control!!!
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@simplyfelicity: Who needs enemies when you have friends like that? Sheesh...sorry you had to deal with that.
@jaguar: Just read the comment from your SIL. No disrespect towards her, but that sounds like a typical comment from someone who has never had a loss.
@Ms.Badger: I think about you so often
Hope all goes well for you.@ValentineMommy: Enjoy vacation! You need it!!
Just an update on me, I have my hysteroscopy scheduled for Thursday and then Femvue on Friday. I'm not looking forward to either, but here's hoping they both go well. Still waiting to hear back on my blood work.
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@2PeasinaPod: Thank you! I hope your procedure goes smoothly and you find some answers and closure!
!
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