Hellobee Boards

@simplyfelicity: Thank you got this A loss takes a long time to get over so support is always welcome!

1. What is your story? I have a gorgeous 21-month-old daughter but lost her little brother or sister when I was eight weeks pregnant, in June. It was a natural miscarriage and physically, progressed very smoothly. Emotionally it has been much harder.

2. How do you feel today? Okay. I am ten weeks post miscarriage and doing much better these days.

3. If you have any next steps what are they? I had a good plan with my fertility clinic but we are having immigration issues which have ended our health coverage so that's put paid to that. Instead we're using digital ovulation sticks and hoping hard.

4. is there something else in your life you are investing in? My daughter, she's my world. And trying to sort out these damn immigration issues Otherwise, TTC is pretty high up on my priorities, I didn't realize how much I wanted a second child until I lost them.

@travelgirl1: and a for you too.

Yes! the weight. So depressing. @simplyfelicity: Big, big hugs

@swedishfish: You're not a coward. You're human. x I hate using the word, but I feel like I need to acknowledge the loss - and have other people acknowledge it - to move forwards.

@travelgirl1: I'm so sorry to hear about the immigration stuff.

s all around
@jaguar: You are so brave. what a wonderful post.
1. What is your story? DH and I have a beautiful almost 22 month old daughter that took a year to conceive. I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility. My progesterone was on the low side but progesterone suppositories never worked for us. We got pregnant on our second cycle of Clomid and a trip to Paris. We pulled the goalie in November and were totally NTNP. I expected it to take a while so I was shocked to get a BFP at the end of January. I started spotting almost immediately, my progesterone was a 10 but my betas were doubling. We found out at 7w that it was a blighted ovum and I had a D&C the next day. We took 2 cycles off and then got a BFP on the cycle we started trying again. I didn't start spotting until 6 weeks. My progesterone was a 6, and I took progesterone to support the pregnancy. My hcg also wasn't doubling. We saw the heartbeat at 6 weeks, 7 weeks, and 8 weeks. At the 8 week appointment, the baby was measuring perfectly, but the sac was measuring 2 weeks smaller and hadn't grown from my last appointment. We were told if I didn't miscarry by 12 weeks, it was most likely due to a chromosomal issue and I'd have to undergo genetic testing. I was referred to maternal fetal medicine who did another ultrasound at 10 weeks and we saw the baby, laying there so peacefully but no flickering heart. I had a D&C the next day.

2. How do you feel today? Alone. I was with my closest group of mom friends from my first pregnancy, and they are all pregnant or have had their second baby already. I think they're all wondering why I'm not pregnant as I am a SAHM and talked about starting to TTC after DD turned 1. I just didn't have the heart to tell them about my second one (they know about the first). I still tear up a lot when I think about my baby, and how I'd be ready to pop if my first pregnancy had stuck. But the pain has turned from a "take your breath away" feeling to a dull ache.
3. If you have any "next steps" what are they? I have my followup with my OB this week, and we have to come up with a plan moving forward. I can start trying again after my next period (in 2 weeks), and we will start trying. I just don't know if I should go on Clomid or go back to the progesterone suppositories.
4. Is there something else in your life you are "investing" in? My daughter. She is the light of my life, and i'm trying to look at this as more time with my little girl alone. We also moved into a new house almost a year ago and I'm enjoying getting more into the design and little projects.

This is such a great idea!

1. What is your story?
DH and I have been TTC since June 2013 (and NTNP starting the December/Jan before that). Had a natural m/c at 6 weeks with #1 in December of 2013. Since then we have been trying with no further BFPs. I just found out I have a family history of Endo, and I have some symptoms that match that. I'm hoping to look into I at my dr appt in a week.

2. How do you feel today?
Fine today, actually. I felt very bitter and upset throughout much of July. I had officially passed one year of ttc and faced the EDD of the baby I lost. I had to see family today, and luckily no one harassed me about kids (which they have been doing lately- no one knows we are ttc). I feel hopeful about my ultrasound Friday.

3. If you have any "next steps" what are they?
Ultrasound Friday, and will be requesting an hsg at my next dr appt to look into my Endo symptoms.

4. Is there something else in your life you are "investing" in?
Trying to get healthier. I have limited fertility coverage (it's so ridiculously expensive for something so many others get so easily), so we are trying to do what we can and save up for treatments as we are able to pay for them. Right now our focus is on losing weight and working out.

I feel like everyone is probably getting tired of hearing my story, but here goes anyway.

1. What is your story? My DH and I just had our second m/c. The first was when we'd gotten pregnant after only a few months of trying. Our missed m/c was detected at 11 weeks, but the embryo measured 8 weeks (we'd seen a heartbeat at 7); misoprostol didn't "work" so I had a D+C a short while later. Then we TTC for 2 years (including some med & IUI cycles)...and pursued IVF at the 2-year mark. We did get pregnant on the first cycle, but sadly that was a blighted ovum detected at 6.5 weeks. I just had a D+C 3 days ago (8.5 weeks), after meds failed again. Our insurance does not cover IF.

2. How do you feel today? I'm somewhat crampy...and not bleeding. Psychologically, I'm doing a lot better, but I'm just so ready to "move on" to our next steps.

3. If you have any "next steps" what are they? We sent tissue for chromosomes this time...hopefully that will give us some answers. If not, DH and I will have chromosomes drawn, as well as some RPL testing. Hoping that insurance will cover that, but it requires a prior authorization that is hopefully in progress. We have 3 embryos waiting, once we're ready to move on to FET.

4. Is there something else in your life you are "investing" in? Trying to keep myself and DH in (relatively) good spirits... Once I'm physically feeling better, I, too, would like to start doing some more vigorous exercise again (didn't do this during IVF or early pregnancy) and maybe lose a little bit of weight.

Good to connect with all you ladies! And keep the puppy pics coming!

@Crystal: I get that. And you're right, a lot of the feelings that accompany IF and loss aren't rational...but they are ours and sometimes we just have to deal with them as they come. BTW: you are always (ALWAYS) welcome over on the IF threads.

ETA: Thank you!

My fur babies. Evie is the grey kitty, Oscar is the brown kitty, and Spencer is my Golden Retriever. And Georgia's in there too, hehe.

@jaguar: your blog post is amazing, so brave. I really wanted to share with more people when I lost our baby, for various reasons, but my husband is much more private than I am and didn't agree. We compromised on who to tell in the end.

@swedishfish: Thank you honey

@simplyfelicity: It is a lonely process But it is surprising how many others have been through it too, it just isn't talked about. I wish it were different and everyone talked openly. I hate that it's not socially acceptable to talk about a loss.

@mrs bunchy: I'm so sorry about your losses and IF coverage issues. My SIL just had her fourth loss and no take home baby yet, I can't imagine the hurt

@Tidybee: It is amazing how much a child can help heal the miscarriage journey. I'm so glad your daughter is helping.

@Crystal: The EDD must be difficult I hope you get some answers soon.

@FliegepilzHut: I hope you start to feel better soon and get some answers I remember the first few weeks being so raw.

Cute pics everyone!

I so need this thread/place right now. I want to read everything tomorrow, but for now I'll chime in with my story.
1. My husband and I have an amazing too-perfect- for words 20 month old son. We waited over 4 months due to some crazy factors to ttc #2. Got pregnant cycle one. Miscarried naturally at 8 weeks (baby measured 6w2d) on Thursday. Waiting for follow-up with doctor in two weeks.
2. It's hard to describe how I feel. I am so sad. I wanted so bad to be "Little Foot's" mama. At the same time, I have quickly come to a sense of peace about it (after a couple days of serious tears). My baby needed a Mama just for a few weeks and even though it was hard, I'm still honored it was me. Strange things get me though. Babies and pregnant ladies? No problem. The fact that I can have a sandwich at Subway or that I don't have to be careful feeding the animals at the zoo? Super hard (I don't even like subway. I almost never eat there).
3. Next steps: talking to the doc. The nurse-midwife said wait "a few months" but I'd really like to talk it over with my (amazing) doc first (this weekend she told me she was on call when I wasn't sure what was up. I told her we would be out of town and she said "you can still call.") I'd like to just wait until I get my normal period once and then try.
4. Just my son and work and daily life. So many family/friends are pregnant. While it's hard, I remind myself that they still aren't having my LO. No one else ever will. That helps, but I'm still a bit bitter.
We are still out of town, but this is exactly the kind of space I need right now. Thanks for starting it. So much love to those of us who have experienced so much heartache.

@Jess1483: I'm so sorry.big hugs.

1. What is your story? (Sorry this will be long!)

-DH and I were married on 10-10-10. We wanted to wait a year before we started trying, so while on our one year anniversary vacation in Dec. of 2011, we started trying.

I got pg. the 2nd cycle, we were so happy, and I thought my life was perfect. But at 9 weeks we discovered a MMC. It took us a full year to achieve our 2nd pregnancy. I had been going to a fertility clinic here since Jan. 2013, and after initial testing, everything looked good, and we got pregnant naturally in March 2013. I lost that one around 7 weeks.

Sept. of 2013, I started injectables. We got pregnant on the first try with that. But, the day before I left for vacation to the US, we had an ultrasound that showed no growth, and I started miscarrying naturally while on vacation at around 7.5 weeks IIRC.

I was becoming fed up with my doctor at the clinic, and so in January of 2014, I saw another obgyn in town on the advice of a friend. He did a hysterscopy and discovered I had a ton of polyps, which he removed. But last month I decided to go back to the fertility clinic. The doctor I had been seeing had moved, and there was a new doctor who I started seeing. We are now starting our 3rd cycle of injectables. (2nd cycle being last month.)

2. How do you feel today
-Pretty crappy, but a little hopeful because they are upping my dosage since I only had one follicle last month.

3. If you have any "next steps" what are they?
-Although nothing has been detected for certain, they are suspicious of a possible blood clotting issue. I will be on daily heparin (blood thinner) injections upon achieving my next pregnancy. This month we are doing injectables with TI. I also want to get a full work-up when I am in Florida this December. I really think they are just missing something here.

4. Is there something else in your life you are "investing" in?

-Hmm, vacation and tattoos? lol I'm getting a tattoo on Thursday to somewhat represent our struggle. And we are leaving on September 10th for what (for me, DH is coming back sooner) will be a more than month long vacation, and I am so ready for it! Life has been hard to enjoy lately, and I need to get away!

@TheSwissWifeStyle: I'm thinking of a tattoo as well... What is on your mind ?

FYI- my husband just bought a book for us to read about miscarriage- "coming to term". I just started it.. And find comfort in it. It is about his wife and other womens struggles with loss..