If you SAH, do you ever get breaks? Like have family watch the kids one morning or a moms day out program or a baby sitter?
I've never done anything like that (I can't imagine paying for someone to watch the kids when money isn't flowing free and easy) but I am really starting to feel like I need to. My ILs live an hour and half away but they've been traveling a lot recently.
persimmon / 1355 posts
Nope. We don't have family in the area, and money is too tight to hire a babysitter.
papaya / 10343 posts
Not really but LO is asleep by 8 or 830 most nights and we don't go to bed until 11 or 12 so I feel like that is a pretty good break.
blogger / nectarine / 2600 posts
My MIL comes once a week for a few hours but thats when I go to babysit. Im never without kids, mine or someone else, ever.
pear / 1693 posts
Some moms I met in a local moms group and I started a childcare co-op, and I use that sometimes for a break (errands alone, exercise class, whatever). It's been a really great way to get a break without having to spend money.
coconut / 8079 posts
No. My parents live nearby and I need to do better about asking for help. They are happy to do anything, it's just me who has trouble asking for help.
honeydew / 7295 posts
Not unless my husband is home or we have a rare date night. I could use more breaks.
grapefruit / 4291 posts
We get the occasional break when my parents come to stay but otherwise I'm with LO 95% of the time. It's not so bad because I have a group of girlfriends who are in the same boat so we get together on a regular basis. I must admit though that I do enjoy it when DH takes charge so I can sit down and not be "in charge"!
Fortunately my LO will start preschool / kindergarten in mid-late 2015 although we're expecting our second baby at the end of March.
kiwi / 728 posts
No. I wish though. Especially this morning after waking up all night and then deciding that 545 is an appropriate time to wake up and start her day.
persimmon / 1461 posts
I'm the complete opposite, I use my mum and MIL to full capacity and never ever feel guilty about it 
My mum will look after DD at any point I need to drop her off, and MIL is a phone call away. Today my MIL had 4 of the other grandchildren so I popped over with mine too for playtime. Whats another one rugrat, they all take care of each other and the more the merrier! I ducked off to do groceries for 30 mins and when I came back it was as if I never left. I appreciate their help more than I can even say, they've never complained about timing or overdoing it. My MIL feels like she wants to enjoy babysitting kids now, because by the time they're teenagers they won't wanna hang around with granny!
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
We had a nanny for 4 hours a week when I was at home. I tried to convince my husband not to spend the money, but he insisted, for my mental health.
wonderful cherry / 21504 posts
No but I think I should get a babysitter for a few hours a month or something. The only family nearby is my younger BIL who works as many hours as Dh or more. Sometimes I start going crazy though.
squash / 13764 posts
Only if I have a Drs appt...you know your a SAHM when going to a Drs appt by yourself feels like a luxury!
honeydew / 7230 posts
Not at this point. My twins are almost 9 months and have separation anxiety pretty bad. My inlaws are 45 minutes away and have babysat a couple times while DH and I went out. It never goes well since they won't fall asleep or eat much for other people. Someday when they are older (2? 3?) I'd like to get them into preschool or mom's day out.
pomelo / 5660 posts
We have a sitter come for 3 hours Wednesday afternoon. I also have him attend mothers day out a few times a month.
bananas / 9899 posts
Short breaks... I've been out of the house for 2 hours once 2 months ago to eat dinner with my DH without LO. About once a week I get to take a 1 hour long hot tub at the IL's while they watch my DD. It's not much, but it's nice. DD is 5 months.
persimmon / 1328 posts
@hilsy85: haha I so know that feeling! I don't have any regular breaks - although the ILs only live down the road and love taking care of him. They both work full time though so it can be tricky. I recently was horrendously sick with norovirus and DH was working, so I had no choice but to send LO to the ILs for the day, and it was SO WEIRD having the house to myself!
cantaloupe / 6692 posts
Occasionally we have T's regular sitter watch him for the day if we have an appointment or something to do. We pay her for the day so even though the thing we need to do is only for a couple of hours we take the rest of the day off. Lol
Tomorrow is one of those days. We have a few household things to take care of and its just easier to drop T off at the sitters for the day. I go back to work in a couple of months so I like to keep him used to staying with her.
pomegranate / 3053 posts
Before we moved to Asia, hardly. And the only time is when my ILs were in town or we're at my SIL's house. So it's about a couple of times a year before. Now that we have live in help, we do go out on our own, but not as much b/c my husband travels a lot and sometimes has to leave for weeks at a time. However, during the day time, I do get out to do some yoga, take a class here and there, and have lunches with other SAHMs here who also have live in help or have older kids who are in school full-time. Sometimes I feel REALLY guilty though... like I'm not giving my second son the same amount of time I had with my oldest when he was this age. He's not taking as much classes as his big brother. I do take him out a couple of times a week for play dates or just to the playground for some one-on-one time.
papaya / 10343 posts
Reading some of these responses I think maybe I didn't understand that you consider DH watching LO a break. My DH does help out. He works full time and is in night school too so he's not around all that much but he does as much as he can. He gets up with LO every morning and lets me sleep an extra 30-60 min (depending on when he has to get to work). On weekends we trade kid-duty back and forth so we can shower, do projects (me) or homework (him), run errands, etc. He is also fine with my going out with friends sometimes-- although I think I've only done that maaaaybe 3 times in 8 months because it has been only recently that LO would take a bottle or sleep for him. And because we don't have a ton of nights together right now so I don't necessarily want to be gone when he's home.
pomegranate / 3872 posts
We don't do sitters or MDO but I'm lucky in that dh is in and out throughout the day and can shuffle his schedule if I need to do something. I'd say I get out for a bit by myself once a week on average. Every few weeks I get to go to the grocery store on my own and that definitely feels luxurious lol.
hostess / cantaloupe / 6486 posts
My mom does sometimes but it's not a regular thing. LO is usually with my mom if I have a pregnancy check up or something like that. she works and Im too independent/prideful to ask my mom to watch her just so I can do things uninterrupted. My MIL shares property with us but I don't think I'll ever let her watch LO until she is 3 or 4. I've never had anyone other than my parents or DH watch LO. I've looked at a MDO program recently (twice a week and pretty cheap) but I just don't know about it.
honeydew / 7916 posts
No, and DH is starting to have 2-3 nights a week where he comes home at 9 or 10. The only time we've had anything close to getting out or away was when he was in the hospital and counted on the nurses to watch him and we went to the cafeteria. It's bad when you consider the nurses babysitting!
grapefruit / 4213 posts
Yes, my mom babysits once a week. I used to work from home those days but now I'm on an extended maternity leave so I'll get a nice break. I'll have DD2 for awhile those days and my mom will get some one-on-one time with DD1. Eventually she'll take both kids once a week.
grapefruit / 4085 posts
Yes - my MIL is 15 min away and my parents are an hour and each come by once a week for a few hours to watch her while I have some time to myself to go out. I feel very fortunate to have them so close and to want to come by so often and help out.
pomelo / 5093 posts
Absolutely. My mother in law takes her about 10 hours a week, and she's in preschool that much too. My husband and I switch off to give each other breaks to do fun things too.
GOLD / kiwi / 605 posts
not really? My 14 month old isn't the biggest fan of staying with Daddy, so I might be able to slip out on a Saturday or Sunday morning for a quick solo errand.... but I don't get many real breaks.
My MIL came in on Friday and watched her for me for a few hours (she used to granny-nanny for us when I worked so my daughter is super comfortable being left with her still) and I was able to get a pedicure, eat lunch and visit a friend all by myself which was fabulous 
All in all though, a break for me is pretty much a half hour bubble bath every other day or two, depending on how late my husband gets home from work! And when we take "car naps" and I get starbucks and park the car in the parking lot of a local park and read my kindle while she sleeps in the carseat hehe
clementine / 830 posts
Sort of, my 2 year old goes to daycare 3 morning a week from 9-12:30. This way I only have one kid and she naps from 10-11:30. That's when I workout, shower, cook lunch and prep dinner. Then they nap together from 2-4 so if I get all my household stuff done then I can sit on my ass and do nothing.
coconut / 8079 posts
@Mrs. Pink: we totally do the car nap when needed! I need to keep a book in my car.
apricot / 342 posts
DS has little gym twice a week (but that's not really a break from him since I'm participating also). The only real "break" I have is during his nap but DH is home at 3pm Mon-Thurs.. He takes over when he's home so I can relax or continue with anything else I didn't get done that needs to
bananas / 9118 posts
I take them to the Y for an hour 2-3 times a week so they can play in childcare and I can either work or workout for a bit. Heck, sometimes I find a quiet corner and take a nap. They don't care what you do as long as you are on premise.
Otherwise I'll go run errands during naptime on my husband's days off to get a little ME time.
bananas / 9227 posts
Up until she was 19 mo, nope. Looking back, I would never do that again. Although we don't have family close-by that can babysit on a regular basis, and the daycares around here require children to be at least 1 yo, I would find a way to get help. Even a hour of quiet time a day is essential, heck 15 minutes is essential
persimmon / 1281 posts
Yep every Wednesday he spends the day with MIL so I can catch up on stuff at home and one or twice a month SIL babysits so DH and I can go out. This Friday our friends are babysitting as well (an expectant couple). We also hire a nanny on days when I must work from home.
pomegranate / 3716 posts
Thankfully both of our families are local, so yes! I'm partially SAH, as I'm self-employed and CAN work from home. But I do have an office space that I rent. About 3 weeks ago, I started going into the office for a few hours on Wednesdays when my MIL watches LO, and also on Fridays when my mom watches him.
apricot / 411 posts
Not yet, since DS won't stand to be held by anyone apart from me or his dad. Argh! He's only 4 months old though
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