My 18-month-old is an absolute beast to get into the car seat. 90% of the time he throws an absolute fit arches his back flips over grabs onto the car seat rips off the cover… And he's 30 pounds and crazy strong. I have a bad back and neck and I have more than once tweaked my neck or my back trying to force him into the seat. I've tried to wait it out And see if he would eventually sit down. Nope. He climbs down and wanders around the SUV. What on earth am I supposed to do? Anyone have any brilliant suggestions as to how they coerce their Young toddler to get into the car seat?
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I have no great ideas but have sympathy. My 18 month old has started doing this sometimes- not usually at home but when we are coming home from someplace, especially if the car is warm. I thought maybe the black car seat was burning her or something but it doesn't feel hot to me. She flipped herself back so hard she hit her head on the top of the car seat yesterday. She was also just diagnosed with a double ear infection so I'm wondering if it's related in our case. It sucks.
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Every kid is different, but a few things you could try that have worked for me: we do a lot of transition counting. "Ok in 20 seconds we are putting you in your seat unless you can get there first!" "Are you ready to get in your chair or do you need ten seconds?" "Show me how fast you can get into your chair!" If it's non essential/ fun trip, not going could be a consequence. If it's essential I force it quickly as possible to show mama means what she says (this has become rarely needed now, thankfully). I also offer something fun (he likes books) IF he gets in his seat quickly. Hope one of those helps?
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My DS was exactly as you described at that age (physical size too). Not too proud to admit I had to pin him down screaming the times I was desperate (like if we were outside in rain/snow). I often skipped going out or opting to take the stroller on public transit because I dreaded it so much.
Unfortunately we had to turn his seat forward facing early right around his second birthday to alleviate some. It did also help to occupy his hands with a snack or a toy as we approached the car to distract him from the fact that he was going in the seat.
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I distract with toys and snacks to get him to sit still when this happens! Ugh. We went through a long period of this and he's gotten better.
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I bribe with snacks, toy, anything.
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@Raspberry: @dolphin: @hellobeeboston: I've tried toys but he chucks them. If it is a particularly appealing treat like a gummy or something, it works about 50% of the time. Sigh.
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Bribe. Fruit snacks.
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We bait her. A snack *oh my gosh I brought a gogo Squeeze today!* Or, a bandaid. One day, out of desperation I ripped the first aid kit open, trying to find something to entice her. Luckily there was approximately 100 of the bandaids that are so tiny they are useless. She gets one "ban-ban" per car seat buckling.
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We were having issues with our 19 month old and now I do what @MrsBucky: does and prep him for the transition. When we are walking to the car, I say "we are going to the car to go _____ and you will get in your car seat, can you say ok?" And he says ok. Then I say "I'm opening the car door and it's time to get in your car seat, can you say ok?" And then if he's having trouble, I say, "I hear that you don't want to get in your seat, but it's not a choice. I'm going to help you" and I force him in basically. then I usually ask him to help me click the buckle, which usually helps him stop crying/straining. I say "listen for the click!" And then we say "CLICK!" when it goes in and clap. I just started doing this a week ago and I've gone from forcing him in every time to him going in easily every time for the past 3 days. I think making him say "ok" and saying the same "script" really helps since he knows what to expect. Fingers crossed it keeps working.
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@MrsBucky: Thanks. He doesn't seem to understand those kinds of statements yet. He understands we're going in the car and get in your seat I think. But if thens are beyond his comprehension so far. But hopefully once he starts to understand those concepts, it'll get easier.
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@peaches1038: man your LO understands and says a lot of words. We aren't there yet.
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We've been there. Sometimes still there. I refer to it as combat origami.
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@travellingbee: I'm not sure that he actually understands everything, but I think he's gotten used to the words since I say them at least twice a day. He just had a big word explosion, which definitely helps in these situations.
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@lilyofthewest: lol folding him into the seat!
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@peaches1038: ah good point. Mine turns 18 months next week, and he has about 30 words, and understands a lot of nouns and commands, that's about it.
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@travellingbee: I bet he would catch on quickly! 30 words is a lot!!
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My 3 year old does this on occasion and bribes don't work when she's in meltdown mode. I have to put my elbow where the bottom clip is to prevent her from sliding down, cross one arm over the other to get her arms through the straps. As long as I can get too clip, I can usually get bottom. Sometimes I'm sweating by the time I'm done!
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A karate chop to the middle (not hard, just to fold her) and using my arm to hold her back while I get her clips buckled. Then I can usually finangle her into the harness and keep her pushed back while I tighten it. She's almost four and FF.
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My 19 month old does this but I think implementing a script will really help her. She just doesn't (and never has) like being confined.
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@matador84: This is totally me!
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We talk about the transition, ask him to help, bribe with toys or goldfish crackers, and talk up the destination excitedly. I have taken DS for stroller walks in the rain after getting home from daycare because that was the bribe to get him into the car seat.
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Mine was like this, until i moved him forward facing. I moved him right when he turned 2. No advice, it really sucks!!
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Is he into buckles yet? DD has been for a few months, and if I let her snap the chest clip she's happy to get in. Prior to that, I wasn't afraid to bribe with snacks when needed.
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My daycare mum is having the same issue with a smaller sized 20 month old. She plays him nursery rhymes on her phone to try and get him in. I put him in today after we went on an outing together and was able to put him so it's just a parent fighting thing I think. I also suggested she give him a snack to take into his seat or a stuffy or a book. Today I suggested that she get him a little magnadoodle or something that is only for the car and car seat. I keep two stuffed animals and a few books in the car for my daughter and give her one as soon as I am putting her in the seat usually.
Mhopefully something like that might work. Toddlers are surprisingly strong! I would also make sure you praise when he gets in the car seat like he should. -
You have an older one right? Getting my 4.5 year old involved has helped tremendously! "Look! sissy is getting in her car seat too!" Sissy says "buddy! Do you want to let mama buckle you and we can hold hands in our seats?!". They are next to each other with one FF and one RF so they can easily interact. Once he sees that big sis is onboard, he chills out about 90% of the time.
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I had a tough time with getting DS in the car seat the months leading up to him turning two. When he was old enough to get it I'd bribe him with my phone and let him watch Frozen on the two minute ride to daycare. Another thing we did was flipped him forward facing and that helped a lot. Turns out he's super prone to carsickness and I think that's why he put up such a fight. It definitely helped when we turned him around.
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C is fine getting her in, once she is in and we are enroute she takes her arms out of her straps and unbuckled the whole seat.
I have tried everything to get her to stop, sympathies to you.
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