Hellobee Boards

Liv was the same way. If I went in and touched her or just shushed her, she got piiiiiiiiiiiiissed. Honestly, the drowsy but awae thing didnt work for us until like 7 or 8 months. And even up until now, I nurse or rock her to sleep, and she wakes up during the transfer to the crib. Usually she stands up and looks at me, then lays back down and falls to sleep. It did take some crying .I was VERY anti-CIO, but Id had enough one day and over the course of the following 3 days, she figured it out on her own with CIO.

Subscribing to this thread.....

Cobi was the same way... I think that method is often called the put down pick up method, and there is a similar one called the sleep lady shuffle. Both are supposed to be "no cry" options and very gentle and soothing, but Cobi just felt betrayed and emotionally hurt. He would look at me with sad, sad eyes and just bawl, big tears rolling down his cheeks. It was heartbreaking.

It never worked for us either until Cobi was 6 months, then we started sleep training and it was still hard, but now we're over the worst of it. We found out he only responded to the extinction method. I hate the idea of it, it sounds so cold, but he would only get angry if we were next to him and doing nothing. He would calm down the second I picked him back up.

I wouldn't have done the extinction method before 6 months though. I think anytime earlier is too young.

I think that your best bet is to just keep trying every few days or once a week or so.

Ultimately this is such a short time in your life right now - she will only need you for so long. I now look back on all the months Cobi slept on me, the long nights I rocked him in my arms and forfeited sleep for me - I don't regret one night. I was tired, sure, but it was so. worth. it. I would give a million bucks to relive those nights of holding my precious sleeping baby who NEEDED me. Now? He won't sleep in my arms. He thinks it's play time if he's with me. It makes me sad!

It took me awhile to get to that place where I was HAPPY doing it, I had to realize there was a little human who needed me. He needed ME, he wanted me. He felt comforted by me - now how awesome does that make you feel?! I couldn't amount that feeling to anything. It was priceless.

I hope you find a solution soon!

We are working on this too, but we are doing it in stages. For now When she is drowsy but awake I put her on a pillow on our bed and then put her pacifier in her mouth. She doesnt feel as alone as when she is in her crib, so she relaxes, sometimes plays a little and then sleeps. Once she is asleep I transfer her to her crib. Eventually I will transition to putting her directly in her crib.

@cvbee: hahaha well I have big boobs lol but also his mattress is still at the highest it can be.
Oh and his crib isn't very tall either, just above waist level for me. AND I am tall, 5'8, so that might make it easier lol.

A variation I used to do was hold him away from my body over the crib so that he didn't fall asleep because of the warmth/closeness of my body. That is a huge reason babes wake up when you put them down - all of a sudden they lost their heat source and it startles/scares them.

My midwife suggested putting a blanket in the dryer, then right when you are ready to lay them down, put them on the blanket.

@BeachMama: @Sandy wrote an excellent description of what she did. It was such a help for us and I've gone back to it numerous times. (It's the 12th entry)

http://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-do-before-sleep-training

Good luck to you!!

@BeachMama: I totally feel your pain. I think we started sleep training right after the 4 month sleep regression. I even started a topic on it at the time lol (shes almost 14 months now.) CIO was the ONLY thing that worked for us. People think Im evil for it, but its not like I let her scream for hours. HEres a tip-you know the difference between angry screams and sleepy wails and the screams that are hysterical and inconsolable. Id go in for those hysterical ones and pick her up and calm her down, but the others I just let go. Its hard, but it gets easier, and it took literally 3 days for her to only cry for less than a minute.

@BeachMama: My fix was to wait longer before putting him down for a nap. I know the experts say the opposite but my experience says this. For example, this morning it was 2.5 hours before his 1st nap. Now he's been napping for an hour and twenty minutes and counting. When I was putting him down 'at the first sign of sleepiness' (which was much earlier) he was only sleeping 45 minutes. You will have to keep experimenting. Good luck! (And as I said earlier, I've only figured out naps, not how to keep him from waking up in the first hour of bedtime....putting him down earlier or later for bedtime doesn't seem to make a difference yet there).

@cvbee: aw thanks! It's crazy how much you can learn in just 6 months of a baby's life!! I should write a book bahaha.

@BeachMama: Sounds like you are doing great! I was going to chime in and say that LO is 17 weeks and we have been sleep training since about 12 or 13 weeks, after having one hellish week of very little daytime sleep.

I was never opposed to CIO so perhaps it was easier for me that way? I am also lucky in that LO very rarely loses it for longer than say, 10 minutes. If she does I will go in and comfort her and, if needed, try and put her down again later after she has settled.

I know there are opposing viewpoints on this matter, but do not let yourself feel bad for doing CIO. Think of all the babies whose parents did CIO. I'm sorry, but I just don't believe that they are all damaged adults. On the other hand, if you find that it absolutely does not work for your baby, don't feel bad for abandoning it. You have to do what's best for you, but I totally feel you on the need for sleep (for both baby AND mom!). It's so important!

@artbee: I think this is how I'm going to handle it. I don't mind rocking him to sleep after a bottle at all, and I'm sure I'll miss it when he grows out of it.

I don't think I can do cry it out, and, *knock on wood*, his sleep is getting better, so hopefully we won't have to. I do try to jostle him a little when I transfer him to his crib, though, so he wakes up a bit and realizes he's in his crib. If I set him down totally passed out, he'll wake up in 30 minutes.

@bree72: We got lucky with my LO's night time sleep, she was always a great night time sleeper and slept 12 hours by 2 1/2 months. Nap time was a different story.... she was an awful napper and I'd always have to move her and do stroller, car, swing, etc. We also didn't feel comfortable with CIO and just dealt with it. Then one day when she was 8 months DH stuck her in her crib and she fell asleep, no tears. She's been a great crib napper ever since!