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Same as ladybee, the table gets set and everyone serves themselves

She doesn't cook.

If she cooks us dinner at her house we always just do family style; everything on the table and serve ourselves.

If she cooks us dinner at our house, I typically plate up in the kitchen and always serve her first since she is the guest!

Yep, buffet style!

She serves me first. Being "served" at their house was something that took me a while to get used to - we grew up collecting our own meals from the kitchen/stovetop... She makes a point of collecting FIL's plate when they have dinner at our house or at my parents place (when everyone else serves themselves). I find it a little rude, actually, as if its insinuating that guests should be served.

We usually do buffet style. I'm breastfeeding, though, so she keeps a constant stream of food on the coffee table for me. I think she's afraid I'll starve to death if there isn't food constantly within arms reach!

On the extremely rare event that we go to their house for dinner, we typically just serve ourselves. However when dh and I were dating and we'd go there she would serve us sometimes. I think she served me first but can't remember. I always hated being served!

When we visit and she cooks, we serve ourselves!

We have only had dinner at her house. She serves her son first.

She sets the table and we pass dishes to the left.

Self serve!

Family-style/ self-serve.

We do self-serve buffet-style around the island in the kitchen.

Buffet style here, too.

No idea. Everyone just grabs for different platters. I don't remember her ever truly serving us. It's so formal.

@Ocean girl: when not at home I make my husband's plate, not because I think the hosts are rude for not making the guests' plate, but because I make his plate at home.

Me first!

@Ocean girl: My husband and your FIL are very capable of picking up a plate and putting food on it, but that isn't the point. I didn't grow up seeing my mom serve my dad and always felt it was rude when my aunt would insist that my mom do it just because that's what my aunt did for hers. However, making my husband's plate feels right for us and it's an act of love. Once he was chided by friends for "making" me do this, which was so incredibly rude and wrong. I am not ordered by him to fetch this or that.
Continuing to be ourselves outside of the house doesn't hurt anyone else. I don't ask the hosts to do anything different or special for my husband. It's just the way I treat him. Don't take it personal, it isn't about you unless your MIL makes comments that her son should be served, then by all means tell her to mind her business.