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Pregnancy After Loss Support Thread

  1. ChiCalGoBee

    nectarine / 2028 posts

    @bhbee: Thinking of you. When’s your appointment? How far along will you be?

    I had healthy NIPT results delivered today which was such a relief. Thinking of all of you during the early, precarious weeks. Time moves so slowly and there is so much worry. Sending all my love and positivity your way. Today at 11 weeks with NIPT I am finally starting to allow myself to get excited, and I hope to cheer all of you on as you reach the milestones you reach.

  2. MrsJBeeG

    clementine / 787 posts

    @ChiCalGoBee: so so so glad to read your update! It’s so wonderful to find out positive news for those of us on this board. It’s also wonderful you’re getting excited!

  3. bhbee

    cantaloupe / 6085 posts

    @ChiCalGoBee: so exciting to get good results! Congrats! I feel like i can also relax a bit then if i make it there (and then worry again as the anatomy scan comes up)

    My scan is Wednesday and I’ll technically be 9w but by ovulation expect to measure closer to 8. I’m going to beg to get the nipt in 3 weeks instead of waiting the usual 4 between appts.

  4. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    @bhbee: Ugh, the vivid miscarriage dreams are the worst Pregnancy dreams are super dumb in general, but those really get me

    @ChiCalGoBee: Yay, such wonderful news!!!!

  5. ChiCalGoBee

    nectarine / 2028 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: Thank you so much! Can’t wait to hear how your next scan goes!
    @bhbee: 4 more days. I’ll be thinking of you and anxiously awaiting your update!!
    @periwinklebee: Thank you so much! How are you feeling. You’re almost there!!

  6. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    @ChiCalGoBee: Thank you - I'm feeling pretty decent; not exactly comfortable, but I'll gladly take third tri over first tri any day. I can't wait to meet our little guy!

  7. Mrs. Champagne

    coconut / 8483 posts

    Hi guys.

    I'm 10 weeks into pregnancy number 5. I've got two kids, I had a miscarriage after my son and another one after my daughter and now hoping this one sticks. My symptoms have been coming and going which is making me super nervous.

    I had a good ultrasound at 7 weeks 4 days. And now I just feel so unsure. I was so so nauseous on the 25th and 26th but now I'm feeling fine and it's freaking me out. I have a doctors appt on the 9th and hopefully they can hear the heart beat.

    Hope everyone is doing ok! I hate being nervous. We thought we wanted 4 kids but I don't think I can do this again. The anxiety and losses are too much for me to handle 😩

  8. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    @Mrs. Champagne: I'm sorry for all the uncertainty I hated with first tri how I spent most of the time feel really sick, and it was hard to enjoy the moments of relief because I was worried something was wrong. With my loss, I felt just as miserable between when the hb had stopped and the D&E, so I know it doesn't even work like that, but I couldn't help worrying... So just to say, I think we all feel this way. I hope the time flies by between now and your next appt. Will you be doing an NT scan or NIPT then as well?

  9. bhbee

    cantaloupe / 6085 posts

    @Mrs. Champagne: hugs not as far along as you but i struggle with the same thing every time i don’t feel awful. Hoping time passes quickly until your scan.

  10. ChiCalGoBee

    nectarine / 2028 posts

    @Mrs. Champagne: Thinking of you. Not sure if this helps, but around 10 weeks my symptoms seemed to lessen, too. They are better on the whole but I’m still throwing up once in a while. All the this is to say that the wait for the next appointment sucks but your baby is hopefully doing fine.

  11. LCTBQE

    nectarine / 2461 posts

    @Mrs. Champagne: stalking this board-- I'm 6.5 weeks but I don't have the guts to join before an ultrasound Just wanted to tell you my good thoughts are with you, and also that my symptoms almost completely cleared up by about 10.5 weeks during my pregnancy with my son. I was really nervous about it as I remembered during my first loss that the lessening of the symptoms was consistent with fetal demise--but that was much earlier. I think a lot of people start feeling better around 10 weeks hang in there.

  12. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    Sending so much for 2018 to be the year where we all get to hold our sweet babies

  13. Mrs. Champagne

    coconut / 8483 posts

    @LCTBQE: @ChiCalGoBee: @bhbee: @periwinklebee: thanks so much ladies. Your words made me feel a lot better. Hope everyone is having a nice New Year's Day

  14. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    @bhbee: Thinking of you - what time is your scan tomorrow? How are you feeling emotionally?

  15. bhbee

    cantaloupe / 6085 posts

    @periwinklebee: early thank goodness - and it’s the first day back to school for my 5yo so it should be busy enough to move things along until the appt at 9:30.

    I don’t know how i feel ... i was freaking out more a week ago, now i am going between thinking “this has to work out” and “no way there’s a healthy baby in there”. I know all the negatives can easily be reasoned away but .... I’ll just be glad when it’s over. I also just thought through that i could have a d&c on Friday if needed because my mom is visiting my brother and could watch my kids. But i thought it kind of in a zen way at least.

  16. ChiCalGoBee

    nectarine / 2028 posts

    @bhbee: Thinking of you constantly, and I will be waiting to hear how it went tomorrow. Sending so much love and hope.

  17. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    @bhbee: I'm glad you got an early appointment - sending so much

  18. bhbee

    cantaloupe / 6085 posts

    thankfully the morning went by quickly. my OB cut to the chase and found one baby with a nice fast hb (she doesn't measure rate). measured 8w1d which lines up with opks. so far so good.
    she definitely knew I was nervous (she even remembers my history before I saw her which I give big points for) and offered to let me come back in 2 weeks, but I settled on 3 so that I could also get the NIPT done then.
    emotionally I'm kind of all over the place, I think I might need a good cry to reset. I know it's unlikely to have another genetic issue loss but I'll just feel better when first tri is over.

  19. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    @bhbee: Yay!!!! I've been so nervous for you this morning, such wonderful news!!!!! You are right that odds are definitely in your favor now, but I know it is still so hard... NIPT will be here soon - we had ours done at 11 weeks as well, and results back by 12 weeks. Have a good cry, or a good self-pampering, or whatever you need to feel better in the meantime

  20. MrsJBeeG

    clementine / 787 posts

    @bhbee: yay! So happy to read a good update for you. I know the road is looking long and uncertain but you are a step closer to a third sweet baby.

  21. ChiCalGoBee

    nectarine / 2028 posts

    @bhbee: YES YES YES!!! Congratulations!! What a relief!

  22. bhbee

    cantaloupe / 6085 posts

    @periwinklebee: @MrsJBeeG: @ChiCalGoBee: thanks for the love ladies! I have been feeling better about it after getting some distance from the emotion of the appointment. I took a little plunge and ordered a new big sister shirt for my oldest and a little sister and little brother onesie for the reveal to the kids, assuming we get past NIPT (thank you free amazon returns!).

    hopefully the time will pass pretty quickly - I think between feeling sick and having both my older kids' bdays coming up that should keep me from stressing too much.

    and @MrsJBeeG: thinking of you - good luck tomorrow!

  23. MrsJBeeG

    clementine / 787 posts

    I posted on the August due date board. Sadly the embryo stopped developing in the last two weeks so I’m going to miscarry in the future. Not thenews I was hoping for and I don’t know what the future will hold - if we’ll keep trying or not. But I know that all of you ladies are wonderful and I’m so keeping you in my prayers that your babies are healthy and happy!

  24. bhbee

    cantaloupe / 6085 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: oh no, no no no. I am so sorry. Take care of yourself we are here for you no matter what.

  25. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: I'm so, so sorry Please know if and when you decide to try again that there are so many stories here of women with consecutive losses who finally got their beautiful rainbow babies: @Shantuck: @LCTBQE: @winniebee: and many others. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this

  26. MrsJBeeG

    clementine / 787 posts

    @bhbee: thank you so much. I’m already feeling better about what is happening. My DH wrapped me in his arms and just held me for many minutes.

  27. MrsJBeeG

    clementine / 787 posts

    @periwinklebee: thank you! Your message is very sweet and does give me hope. My doctor was very nice and told me it’s likely old eggs and if we keep trying - we’ll get a good one.
    He pointed out to me that all looked good with the pregnancy until today so we know we can have kids - which is a good thing. That gave me hope too. I suspect we’ll keep trying after the dust settles from this loss but only time will tell. Thank you for the hope.

  28. periwinklebee

    grapefruit / 4466 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: TTCing while "old" sucks. I'm so glad though that your husband has been really supportive. Take care of yourself

  29. Shantuck

    pear / 1767 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: Sorry for your loss. I'm dealing with old eggs as well (I'm 38 and have a diminished ovarian reserve) and was told by an RE that it will be a perseverance game for me. After my first two losses, I had my beautiful daughter and while I can now say that she was worth all the heartbreak, it definitely sucked while it was happening. Sending virtual hugs.

  30. chypmunk

    cherry / 239 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: I’m sooo sorry!!! I can’t believe it, please know that I’m thinking of you often, and so sorry this happened. Stay positive your rainbow will come ❤

  31. ChiCalGoBee

    nectarine / 2028 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: Oh my goodness I’m so, so, so sorry. Sending so much love during this hard time

  32. math.nerd

    apricot / 253 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: I'm terribly sorry to hear this. No need to decide now what you'll do next. All you need to do now is feel whatever it is you are feeling - mad, sad, and probably a mixed up combination of a million feelings. My heart goes out to you and we're all thinking of you right now. xxxx

  33. MrsJBeeG

    clementine / 787 posts

    @math.nerd: @ChiCalGoBee: @chypmunk:

    Thank you. I read your posts earlier and it made me cry - happy tears because of sweet thoughtful friends - perhaps nontraditional friends since we haven’t met - but friends in my mind. I do appreciate it. Probably going to stay away from HB until I work through the emotions, the actual loss and what to do next. I don’t know what we will do as it relates to TTC - I do need to deal with what is happening now I admit. But part of me still feels, even after a day like today - that DH and I are meant to have our own baby and it’s just a matter of time if we keep trying.

    Thank you all and my prayers are with you all.

  34. crazydoglady

    nectarine / 2431 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: Just jumping in to say how very sorry I am. I am so sad to read this. Like many others, my son was my rainbow after two losses. I have so much hope that your rainbow is right around the corner, but I am so sad you are going through this now. Hugs.

  35. Mrs. Champagne

    coconut / 8483 posts

    @MrsJBeeG: I'm so sorry for your loss ❤

  36. crazydoglady

    nectarine / 2431 posts

    Can I hang out here? I'm currently 5 weeks on the dot and while my 2 losses were before my LO, I very much still feel like a "loss mama" if that makes sense. As much as I hated morning sickness, it would make me feel better because it was the only difference between my loses and my pregnancy with LO.

  37. bhbee

    cantaloupe / 6085 posts

    @crazydoglady: you are welcome here! Hoping your sickness shows up this week sending you lots of sticky dust

  38. ChiCalGoBee

    nectarine / 2028 posts

    @crazydoglady: Welcome, and I'm so sorry for your losses. I have my fingers crossed for a sticky baby for you.

  39. bhbee

    cantaloupe / 6085 posts

    Ok ladies need some Doppler input. I’m almost 10w which is around the time trouble started appearing in my last loss. So that’s on my mind a ton. But i can’t decide if a Doppler will make things better or worse. I keep wondering what i would do if i couldn’t find the hb one time and how much i would freak out perhaps for nothing. It’s 2w until my next appt.
    What was your experience if you used one? Did it cause extra anxiety too

  40. MaryM

    pomelo / 5129 posts

    @bhbee: I've used one through this pregnancy. But I didn't get it until 14-16 weeks. I was afraid that any earlier, I'd freak out more.

    And even when I did receive it, the first time I used it I found my own heartbeat instead of the baby's and got really worried about why it was so low.

    If you're willing to wait about 6 weeks, I could send you mine. I got it from another mom who said I could pass it on instead of sending it back.

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