Hellobee Boards

@bhbee: Thanks. Luckily DH is so good and I went out after dinner to the gym and then came home and holed up in the basement while he took care of things.

@knittylady: Sorry you guys aren't on the same page. Waiting is tough when you just want to move on and keep trying.

@Jruess: I totally get that telling is hard, but they have to do it. I'm lucky that my mom was here for a few days visiting so I didn't have to call her but still.

@periwinklebee: Making albums would be a good distraction and fun to do. I hope you are under 2 and can stop going for draws.

@bhbee: I hope you guys can get to be on the same page. Sounds like a fun getaway. Hopefully it will be relaxing.

I think DH and I are in similar places with still trying. After a year of trying for number 2 we were so excited. Now we are both scared of trying again but we know that we would love one more in our family. It's a hard decision how long do we keep trying but for now we will. My family doctor says to wait for 3 months and the nurses at the loss clinic said one cycle, so we will start not using protection this cycle and see where that goes. I'm not ready to track or time things yet.

@ALV91711: that it happens soon!

@Kemma: I'm so sorry. Those announcements are the worst. Hopefully your cycle gets back where you want it soon!

Ok ... I just put it together that yesterday felt better because I did not have to be around pregnant people. I've been avoiding my SIL who is pregnant too (would have been due 1m before me). Sigh.

Never, ever, ever go into Target at 11 AM on a weekday. That place is crawling with newborns and tiny babies.

I'm struggling today.

@Kemma: @mrskansas: sorry you ladies are struggling! I've overheard my boss & co-worker discussing her pregnancy but they haven't said a word to me. She is new & this is her first. It has been so hard & honestly I think it's worse because it's like they are hiding it.

@ALV91711: oh no, I get it. He should definitely share. My parents were a big source of comfort for us because they lost my sister at 20 weeks so they knew what we were going through. I think the reason my hubby was reluctant to tell his parents was because they would say something insensitive. Which is exactly what they did and the reason I'm barely speaking to them. His mom's first question was to ask if I was eating properly.

Nothing like getting another d&c bill to brighten your day! it's just insult to injury that they don't cover the pre-surgery (ie finding out) visit like a pregnancy visit.

As for today I'm kinda confused because my cm says DO IT NOW but my opk is totally negative (which is better than a false positive but still). So I'm guessing I'm either going to just have a lot of ewcm this cycle or not really ovulate? I usually wouldn't see cm like that until the day of opk+. Oh well it's a lot of progress at least!

@periwinklebee: I'd be ok with af too! that might even be better honestly. But I've noticed that pre-ov type soreness too and I've been ... in the mood so maybe there's a chance for ov. Honestly who knows! Can't wait for normal cycles!

Ugh I'm kind of a wreck today. We attempted bd yesterday (i.e. actually trying on a fertile day) and it just felt complicated - all in my head but still. After I was an emotional mess and today I feel swamped in sadness after some very good emotional days. Maybe we are not ready. But part of me is still desperate to be trying. And I just took these tests so I guess ovulation is trying to happen (still a bare squinter on hpt but must be really low and I got opk- for several days prior). I'm not really looking for advice just venting. Dh doesnt get any of it which i know we all deal with. I am a go with your gut/heart person but I'm not even sure what that is telling me to do. Im now pretty sure we'll miss next month (and July) so that is messing with me too.

@bhbee: I'm sorry you're struggling. It's so hard...

I had a positive opk this morning (and very close to positive yesterday) and we did bd. At this point I'm not really acknowledging the possibility that it could work out mentally, though. I feel like I need a break from TTC, and I have such low expectations that I don't expect it to lead to anything. I'm hoping a cycle of really low expectations will feel close enough to a break, and I will be ready to feel more hopeful again in the future.

PSA to other Sept loss mommas, I hadn't been on social media in forever but for some reason went and skimmed through fb yesterday. Mistake - it's right around the time when people with Sep due dates are having anatomy scans and announcing on fb. I'm happy for everyone with a sep due date but it made me really miss the baby that we lost.

@periwinklebee: I'm sorry about fb. it's the worst sometimes.

@periwinklebee: Also, we're low expectation cycle buddies!

@mrskansas: maybe it's because I usually don't test in am and caught a different part of surge. I have short surges sometimes too so who knows! I'm always so relieved to get past ovulation and relax until I start obsessing at 7dpo. Or hopefully not at all this time? Ha.

In following the low expectations plan, I had a fight with dh followed by checking-the-box bd. Ha. But with a super positive opk yesterday afternoon I'm fine with it. Definitely calling it a day on this month! For some reason I just don't think this will be it but I'm glad we did something.

Thankful we can go on our trip without worrying about bd timing too. Hopefully that will help get me through the tww without obsessing too much!

@knittylady: good luck at the interview!

@mrskansas: yes, I'm 0 dpo and I told myself low expectations. And today I bought frers and looked up a due date. Right now I feel less emotionally invested in the outcome, let's hope that sticks.

@periwinklebee: I've noticed that with the September announcements, too It's hard; I'm right there with you. Big hugs

@knittylady: I hope it went well!

@theotherstark: it's hard, lots of reminders. Thinking of you.

@mrskansas: I'm so sorry. It's hard. Maybe just a break is in order? You both might feel differently after a couple months off. Or not but it might clarify things. Might feel better for you if the door is not closed yet.

I don't think though that medicated cycles are actually much better (and sometimes worse if they do something like affect your lining) if you already knew you could get pregnant. I did about 4 iui with clomid and trigger trying for #2 and only got one early loss out of it. But I did eventually get a sticky one later. It felt like a long road, though I know others have much worse. Anyway my point is that if/when you decide you do want to try again, there's still lots of hope. And if you decide to be done I get that too! I'm not sure how hard we will keep trying before we're done. Maybe a few more months here and there but I understand all the points you have made! Hugs

@mrskansas: I'm so sorry thinking of you.

@bhbee: gave great advice - you have lots and lots of time to decide what's right for your family, and if you're unsure about continuing or just need a mental health break, taking some time off could help. You're also coming up on your due date from your first loss, right? That just sounds super hard - and it's completely normal to feel super down about it. We didn't get pregnant right away, so no due dates coming up, but it still sucks to reach the point where we could have had a baby if we'd gotten pregnant right away. I am really dreading hitting my due date in September.

Anyways, we are all here to listen and commiserate.

@periwinklebee: I do think summer will help! But that sadness is totally normal. We were just on a mini vacation where I felt great but coming back, with the emotions for end of a trip too, the sadness came back some. I hope the sunshine has you feeling good soon