My daughter was born the day after Christmas via c-section and everything went will with the procedure and she and I are both healthy. I was fine emotionally in the hospital but the day we came home I start feeling sad in the late afternoon and then crying uncontrollably for hours, worrying about how my life has changed, how my relationship with my 6 y.o. son has changed and then freaking out about existential matters like death and climate change. It's been the same pattern every day since (today is the fourth day). Since I've had S.A.D. in the past, I believe the mood swings are triggered in part by the sun starting to go down. I have a light box I've been using and I think that helps, but it doesn't stop the crying or negative thoughts.

Six years ago after my son was born I was diagnosed with PPD. However my midwife diagnosed me on my first day home from the hospital and prescribed me a really powerful drug, Ativan. I'm not sure I even had full on PPD but Ativan didn't really help and in fact was extremely difficult to go off of once I started feeling better. It took a few months to feel better, and I think that was just due to time passing. I already take antidepressants, which worked fine before a few days ago, and I'm worried that if this is PPD I might have to take a more powerful drug.

Anyways, I'm hoping this is, in fact, just the baby blues, and I'm writing this in the hopes that other moms can tell me it gets better. I read that 75% of moms experience similar mood swings and that usually they go away within two weeks. That seems like a long time to me at this moment, but I'm hoping it's true.