My husband is a groomsmen in a wedding out of town in Nov. the same weekend our in town family is going to a separate out of town wedding. At the time of the wedding we will have a 2.75 yr old and a 3 month old.

The groom told us to book our room already because they were running low so we did. I also had my husband ask if it is okay to bring the kids and the groom said yes, but when the save the date came and I went to their website it says it is black tie. We have already booked hotel and airfare so we are going, but I don't know what to do about the kids. Here are the options I have thought of.
1. Ask my BFF to stay at the hotel that night. She lives 1.5 hours away from the wedding and we have plans to hang out anyway. Downfall is she has a 1&5 yr old of her own that then her hubby would have to watch.

2. Fly my mom in. We could pay for her ticket, but that is gonna be $450.

3. Go, but have me just stay with the kids and not attend the events.

Any other ideas? What would you do?