Hellobee Boards

Pregnancy announcements are hard for me. We've been trying for 10 months and I was diagnosed with PCOS so I don't know how much longer it will take. I've been really open about our journey with my friends, so they have for the most part been really sensitive about telling me - emailing me/texting me instead of telling me in person so I can process the news privately. But to be honest, whenever I get the news that yet another person in my life is pregnant, my initial response is sadness. I wish it wasn't that way, but I think it's pretty normal.

I totally understand how you feel. I was the last of my friends to get married so I have also lived through that. And now that TTC has taken an unexpected turn to IVF, I feel it even more. It is ok to be happy and maybe a little jealous all at the same time. My friend and I started TTC at the same time and now she is halfway through her pregnancy. That was quite a blow. But continuing to have a positive outlook on your own journey can only be good for you, too, so I definitely encourage happy thoughts for her and happy thoughts for you.

We aren't TTC yet either and it still gets to me, more than I would like. Like a few other people said, we were on the later end of the engagement/marriage wave, and now yeah, it just feels so familiar. And we haven't started trying, so it's ridiculous to get upset about it, but there you go.
The really judge-y part of me gets upset because we are waiting a few more months until we are in a better position financially, while people who I (in my judgmental little mind) feel aren't in a good position to have kids get pregnant. I can't even admit that to anyone but H.

It's hard. I still don't do well with it. I am always nice, but it still hurts. I have to remind myself that their success doesn't mean ill be a failure. They are not related, but its still hard to deal with. Ivebeen having trouble with the people who were pregnant with me are having their babies now. All have come with some sort of complication, but the babies have been okay, which is wonderful! But, its just hard when their babies are ok and have a chance but mine didn't.

Hugs!!! Sorry, it does suck. I am generally happy for them because I see now how hard it can be to conceive and I'm happy that they don't have to deal with our problems. I guess that's what I try to tell myself. It's hard to keep those negative thoughts away about why it's not happening to us.

First of all, don't be too hard on yourself. What you're feeling is completely normal. It took us 11 cycles of TTC before getting a positive and I remember hearing from my very fertile friend complaining about how it took her a long time getting pregnant with her 2nd son ... when I asked her how long, she said it took a whole 3 months!!

Hugs!

Boy, I can sure relate on the marriage front. I started getting really bitter about being "left behind" especially at all these weddings. I was happy for my friends, but it all seemed so "in your face"... and I'd imagine it would be VERY similar with pregnancy since there is the obvious baby bump and the sudden "mommy brain". That analogy really helps me understand how hard it is!

@JoJoGirl: I will admit with a little bit of shame that I felt a little inadequate and jealous all those years. My friends started getting married just after college (so I was 21) and I didn't get engaged until I was 37... Think of all the wedding presents, dresses, etc I had to buy during that time. I finally had a huge meltdown (in private) just before a wedding about 6 months before Mr. Jacks proposed. It wasn't pretty, but it was cathartic!