Hi everyone,
This is my first post, although I have been reading the boards for a looooong time. I always find such interesting topics and great advice here, so hoping for some feedback/perspective on my current situation.
Brief background: DD is almost 2.5 and attends a daycare centre two days per week (Th/F). My mom looks after her at our home from M-W. I have never LOVED the centre, but after the initial transition period last fall she adjusted and seems happy enough to go there. However, there have been several incidents over the past year she’s attended that have bothered me slightly, including one that REALLY upset me in early July:
After some tears at drop off, I logged into the webcam one day around nap time to witness my DD being pushed three times in a row by the same child. She fell over each time, and would stand up and walk away, but he continued to follow and push her over again. After the third time she lay on the carpet and started to cry, and it looked like he tried to kick or hit her in the head. Finally, one of the staff intervened, but it took far too long, IMO. I was so upset I called the supervisor and asked her to check on my DD, and when she came back on the line I felt like she completely avoided the issue and instead began telling me about how my DD was “off” that day, and wasn’t “engaging” with the other kids or the staff, so they didn’t want to “force”her to do anything and risk upsetting her. I had to clarify what my concerns were and specifically ask AGAIN if my DD was okay and if anyone knew what actually happened. She said my DD was “fine” and didn’t have any bumps or bruises. I was asked if I wanted them to file an incident report and I said no, but that if it happened again I’d like to be informed. Haven’t heard/seen anything similar since, but a few other minor things have happened that I’m not impressed with, and I honestly feel like withdrawing her altogether and finding a new daycare.
So, my question is, am I over reacting to this incident and letting it sour my entire perception of this daycare? Or do I have a legitimate reason to be upset/concerned?
I always mix up everyone that doesn't.
And then to have my concerns sidestepped would feel like an injustice. My DS’s daycare does not have cameras, but one thing they do when there are incidents is really describe the whole scene. They just give a lot of details in addition to the incident report that gives me peace of mind that they are on top of it and keeping kids safe and correcting problem behaviors. Details like where they were when it happened, where the kids were, how many kids they had in the class, what they think precipitated the behavior, if it’s been happening with other kids, how they are going to prevent it next time. Whether DS is at fault or the victim of the incident, I will usually have a follow-up email or in-person conversation about the circumstances in order to get details. Since you saw what happened, I would have conversations along that line with the teachers and gauge the reactions and responses that you get. Yeah, and unfortunately, I would be prepared to find a new place. Sorry you are going through this and welcome.
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