My 1yo has been getting up at 4:15/4:45 for about 3+months now so I don't believe it's connected to teething, walking, "leaps" etc. He wakes up grumpy and sleepy so I know he needs more sleep. Sometimes he falls asleep on me nursing- I've tried to not nurse him til 6am or so as not entice him.
We are naturally early risers- I get up at 4:30 also but even on days I sleep in he wakes so it's not me waking him.
He takes 2 naps at daycare and I don't think his carer would change his schedule because she's very structured... he gets a 30 min morning nap and a 1-2 hour afternoon nap. I don't let him sleep past 3:15. He's grumpy in the evenings during witching hour.
Bedtime is a very strict 7:30 set by him. Won't fall asleep earlier. And no matter when I adjust it, he wakes up at the same time.
I feel like his naps are quite good and he STTN great. Why is he waking up early? To be with me?!
CIO does not work with him- he completely escalates into hysterics.
What have you done that works?!
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My son did this and I just brought him into bed with me to cuddle or nurse. He would just fall back to sleep and we'd wake up for the day around 6 or 7.
But he is almost 3 and still comes to find me in the middle of the night. He usually sleeps the second half of the night in my bed. I'm ok with this, but depending on your parenting philosophy you may not want to go there!
Personally I am all about maximizing my own sleep, and letting him sleep with me was the best way to do that.
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Two thoughts. One, you could be waking him on weekdays and he's used to getting up that early, which is why he's waking early on sleep in days too. Two, how do you treat a wakeup at 12 or 1? You have to treat that 4:15 wakeup exactly the same. That's a MOTN wakeup, not morning. I have no specific advise because my kid didn't STTN until 18 months and I nursed her back to sleep until then.
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@Grace: I agree. Treat it like a Motn wake up, every time. Even on days you are awake that early. It needs to be consistent.
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I don't think he's napping enough. My girls have all taken two 1.5-2 hour naps at that age.
I'd work on lengthening his naps and she how it effects night sleep. 13-16 hours of sleep is normal at that age and he is well below that. -
@oliviaoblivia: definitely could be but my one year old take 2 naps that are both between 45 min and 1 hour and sleeps great at night.
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@travellingbee: he's doing 11/12 at night though right? This little guy is only getting 8-9.
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I agree with pp about treating it like a middle of the night waking. That's what I used to do when my one year old woke between 5-6, which was from 10 months-13 months. She didn't start sleeping until 6:15-7 until I stopped nursing in the morning. I think she was waking up to nurse in the morning. Sometimes she wakes early (at least once a week) and I go give her a cup of milk and put her back in bed.
ETA- for a while she was doing two 45 minute naps. We switched to 1 nap at 11 months and now her nap is between 50 minutes-2 hours. It's usually around 1 hour 15 and then bed at 7:30, sleeps until 6:30/7.
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My first woke at 5 on the button for a long time. He would sleep 7-5 and take 2-2.5 in naps. When we went to one nap he did sleep more at night but only napped 1.5. So would sleep 730-630 and nap 1-230.
I tend to agree that overall it does not seem that he is getting enough sleep. I would leave him until at least 5 am to try to train him to sleep until that point. While some kids are on the low end of sleep needs (like my older) he's only getting 9 at night and 1.5-2.5 in naps. I feel like the 30 min morning nap serves no purpose. For a nap to be restorative it needs to be 45+ mins. Is that what he does at home too?
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I think you're all right, I need to treat it as a MOTN waking. I think I do wake him up. Its hard to get him back down... We've brought him into bed a few times but he is AWAKE and refuses to go back down.
In terms of napping, I'm not sure if he's getting enough but I will say he has absolutely never been a good, long napper. Since he was born he's only napped longer than 1,5 hours like 5 times! And he's in daycare so I have no control over anything.
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@winniebee: His morning nap is usually 20 -1 hour and it's at daycare so I have no control really.... He Really had always been a bad napper
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@Grace: @oliviaoblivia: agree with two things you said.
1) that 4:15 wake up needs to be treated like a motn wake up. My sons wake up time is 7am. I just won't get him earlier than that. So even if he wakes at 6am and calls for me, I go in and act as if it's 2am. No talking, I rock for like 1 min tops and tell him it's night night and out him back. He may not sleep but he's quiet and knows it's night time. Then when it's 7am or later it's lights on excitement lots of talking. So he understands the difference.
2) that definitely doesn't seem like enough nap time. Does she wake him at 30 mins for his first nap? If so I would be emphatic with her that she needs to let him sleep. Her schedule is not more important than your son's. And I'd make that clear. You can definitely share articles with her on naps and how much sleep he should be getting at that age. There are TONS that would back you up. And if the morning nap is later the afternoon nap will also be later which will help with the evening witching hour. And I BET you can keep a 7;30 bedtime (not have to push back) and after a couple weeks of the new schedule he'll get out of the overtired and wired cycle and will sleep better.
But you HAVE to give it a fighting chance. Sleep experts suggest at least 2 weeks even if it feels like it's not working. They have to adjust. -
@pachamama: Both my children are naturally early risers and had this same schedule at that age. I think it's worth trying all the pp's suggestions. We did but we never cracked the code to ideal baby sleep. For us it took time, walking, and weaning. They still wake up at 5 most days. The thing that helped me most was finally accepting it. I go to bed earlier and concentrate on enjoying the bonus time in the early morning instead of treating it like a failure. Definitely not ideal but the mental shift made it a lot more bearable.
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My 3.5 yo is an early riser and regularly goes through 6+ month long phases of waking at 4am for the day. The latest he will ever sleep is 6:30. It has been by far the most challenging thing we've ever had to deal with so I feel your pain. And like your lo, he wakes exhausted and grouchy but refuses to go back to sleep. we've cut out his nap, exhausted him with activity, changed his diet, pushed back bedtime and some other things I can't remember to try and get him to sleep later. Nothing works - he is just a super early riser. But over time we decided to be very strict about treating anything before 6:30am as a motn wake up - tucking him back in, telling him it's still nighttime and ignoring his screams after that. We also implemented the "okay to wake" clock and did not give up when it didn't seem like it was working. I will say that it took about a year to see any results but he's finally starting to "get it". We have been super consistent and even take the clock with us anywhere we go. Now there are more mornings than not when he wakes up on his own but stays quiet until the clock turns green. That was worth all the effort and I'm hoping it's only going to get better!
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@SweetiePie: No one ever wakes him up from a nap, since he was about 3 months old he's taken that short morning nap! It's the worst! As for the early wake-up, it will be a battle- he would never just chill in his crib. It's going to be wailing and flailing.
I just don't know if it's worth the battle for an hour or so more of sleep? Less by the time we get him settled...? -
@pachamama: For what it's worth, at that age I could never get her to sleep in bed with me. She treated it like a party, every time.
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@pachamama: If he wakes that early what time is the baby sitter putting him down for his first nap?
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@mrswin: They respond to him, so around 8:30-10am he takes a morning nap, then around 1 is his afternoon nap.
@Grace: totally haha! He's not a cuddler in general, never has been.
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@pachamama: There's no chance she could drop the morning nap? I feel like that's the problem. Both of my LOs were done with 2 naps by a year. In fact, my older LO was done with a morning nap at 10 months and stretched his afternoon nap to 3 hours.
Once we cut LO2's morning nap, he stretched his afternoon nap to 2 hours, and started sporadically sleeping through the night, but he was also getting molars. It was the only reason he was waking at night. For the last month, he's been consistently sleeping 11-12 hours at night and taking a 2 hour afternoon nap.
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@2PeasinaPod: Hmmm I really don't think he's ready to drop the morning nap; he's very fussy and falls asleep very easily and wakes up happy. His daycare is pretty experienced with it and I think they'll let me know when he's ready
Update: I treated yesterday's 4am (!) wake up as a MOTN and he immediately fell back asleep til 5. Today he slept in til 5 and quietly complained til 5:30 when we got him from his crib. He seemed rested and overall good! I'm hopeful he will learn to sleep even longer..
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@pachamama: I'm glad that there has been progress. I was also going to suggest dropping the morning nap. I believe there is a discussion of this issue in Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child book as well as in Ferber's book.
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