I feel like I've had a few in-law posts lately, but it's just something thats been an issue for me recently. My in-laws are wonderful people, and I'm really pretty lucky honestly....

But, I'm finding myself having a hard time with the idea of leaving LO with them. And I have no idea why. It just makes me uneasy and it bothers me to the point where I get mad thinking about it. I know it's unfair, and it stupid, and unreasonable, but I can't help how I feel. We left her with them for 2 1/2 hours once so far, and I hated it. I'm afraid I'm having some resentment towards my MIL because as I've explained in other posts, she has made a competition between the grandmas, and has put me in the middle, and made me feel like I couldn't be honest with her without her making it into a big deal. I don't feel comfortable calling her to check on LO without her turning it into me "not trusting her to babysit" (that was actually said because my mom babysat first when I came to work). It's not about trust, it's about comfort. I'm not comfortable instructing her on how I want things done. How do I get over this??? It's mostly small stuff, but it makes problems for us at home that I don't want to start. Like they hold her all. the. time. They get her up when she's napping to hold. We really try to put her in her crib for naps, and let her rest. I don't want to have a baby that will only sleep when being held. And when they hold her, they treat her like a toy. Like, FIL will hold her for 5 min, decide hes done, pass her to MIL, then decide 10 min later he wants to hold her again. Poor thing gets no rest! The one time they did watch her for me, MIL didn't feed her when she was supposed to, and didn't lay her down for her nap like I told her to so she only "catnapped" for a few minutes in her arms. It left me taking home a mad, hungry, sleepy baby for the evening. I don't mean to sound like I'm in-law bashing. They are good people. And I'm not trying to deprive them of their grandchild. I just need to know how to let go of control, and become more comfortable with them watching her. They are going to have her 2 days a week, from 3-10. How do I become more confident in voicing how I want things done? And how do I do it gracefully? I'm really struggling with a establishing a happy middle ground...