So right around the time my husband and I got married, I got this intense baby fever. It was the strangest thing for me. I've never been that into kids, and while I always knew I wanted kids, I never had the urge. Then, about 2 months before we got married, I realized that if I got pregnant, that I would be happy. We've been married for 10 months now, and my husband and I are lining up our plans to start TTC soon. I'm still not sure I'm READY. We have a completely stable life that has room for a LO, but I go back and forth. I know this is completely normal, so I wanted to know, what made you KNOW you were ready (at least as ready as anyone can be)?
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I still don't know if I'm ready and I have a 9 month old, haha.
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@swedishfish: LOL
I think if you wait to be mentally ready for things... you might miss out on a lot.
It sounds like you are financially ready and emotionally ready.
We waited till we were married and bought a house and done with school before TTCing. I'll admit we weren't quite sure what to do with a baby and it was scary.
When the hospital let us take the baby home ... we were like what do we do next? But we figured it out and I think you will too.
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@swedishfish: I was just thinking the same thing!
I don't think I was really ready when we started trying. We had JUST gotten married, and D had crazy strong baby fever, and I sort of figured "I have no good reason not to, and it's what we ultimately want, so why not now?" It ended up taking us over a year to conceive our son, though, and by the end of it I was desperate to be pregnant.
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We were ntnp and got pregnant - I was a little bummed at first but got over it pretty quickly. Then I miscarried and I wanted nothing more than to be pregnant again.
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@swedishfish: lol, same here!! LO is 18m!
I think the most important thing is that you're ready to roll with the punches and be glued to that little person. Everything else falls into place. Just know that for the first few years it can be hard to focus on other things, especially if you have a high maintenance LO. So if you have big plans for work or schooling or travel it may be best to wait...but even if you don't, it will all get sorted out eventually.
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When I was 25, long before I was married, I went through an j tense phase of baby fever. I was living a great life, didn't have any friends with kids, and was in NO WAY ready to have kids, so I am convinced that the urge was *purely* biological.
My husband and I have been together for a long time, so we had a pretty clear set of plans for marriage, having kids, etc. that matched up with career advancements, financial stability... And we had a list of things to do before kids that we finished. We started TTC when we had been married for about 8 months. At the time, I felt like it was the perfect time, but I am not sure I felt really *ready* because it's a huge step.
But then it took more than a year to get pregnant. By the time we found out I was pregnant, we were BEYOND ready.
Given his dreams for a family and our TTC experience, DH was ready for number 2 when DD was a few weeks old. Me, not so much.
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I think you reach a point where the risk is less scary than the possibility of not taking the risk.
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I don't think there is ever a point that you have absolutely no reservations. As long as the major things are in place (finances, relationship, etc.) there is no such thing as perfect timing.
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I was exactly where u were... and just after our one yr anniv and ntnp on the fly for a few mths and the actively ready to ttc after that...it sorta just happened and we were elated. Still the hardest thing I've ever done and will probably ever do.
Im at that exact pt w baby fever for lo2! Will probably ntnp for a few mths soon and see what happens!
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We're TTC right now. We decided we probably won't be anymore ready then we are now. We've been married for 2 years, have a home, no debt and aren't getting any younger. It will be a huge change and will challenge our relationship in ways we could never imagine, but it's something we both want and are excited (at least I am) to take on this next step of life together!
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We never really totally felt ready emotionally but were financially stable enough to have a child. We decided to just let nature take it's course. We got pregnant very quickly and honestly i panicked. Here I am with a 5 month old and while I have days of missing my pre-child freedom I totally love this new stage of life. I guess I'm just growing into a mom at day by day pace.
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@Mrs. Sketchbook: well said
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