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Maybe ask him to wear a jacket over his clothing any time he goes out to smoke and then take it off when he comes in?

This wasnt a huge issue for us because my DD was older before she was really exposed to anyone who was a smoker (like 7-8 months old, I made them wash hands). But with a newborn, I could see requesting a clothes change.

We make sure LO is swaddled when SMIL holds LO. And then changes blamkets when she is done. It still bothers me. but this was the best way we could think of to handle it. I am not sure what we wil do when LO is too old to be swaddled:/

Oh man, we have had issues with this. Especially with my in-laws. I think the best thing to do is to make sure they wash their hands, and if you go visit them make sure they are not smoking inside (our biggest issue). I know it sucks because you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings but your LO's health is much more important!

DH smokes and he goes outside every time, so everyone else follows suit.

In terms of third hand smoke... We'll cross that bridge when we get to it (LO is due in 8 weeks).

This may be the unpopular stance, but I think the third hand smoke is a bit blown out of proportion. Obviously I'd never want someone blowing smoke in LO's face, but holding him after having a cigarette... I don't think I'll raise a big fuss. DH understands that cigarettes aren't healthy for anyone, especially a newborn, so it'll be up to him to take the appropriate actions and he will.

All of dhs family are heavy chain smokers. I refuse to take DS to their home because they smoke inside and it has caused a lot of drama. DH is overall supportive but still thinks in being dramatic since he grew up in a smoky house and its fine. When DS was a NB I was crazy with postpartum hormones and mil couldn't hold DS without a blanket over her. A lot of his side of the family think I'm being ridiculous but DS health comes first!

My in-laws smoke and honestly, it's slowly ruining my relationship with them. It just causes SO MUCH STRESS on me, my husband, and our marriage. And they live a two hour plane ride away... I can't imagine what it would be like if we lived close to them. We require them to wear a jacket while they smoke outside and that jacket has to be left outside when they come back in and they have to immediately wash their hands. Honestly, I can tell my FIL thinks this is absurd and I couldn't care less. If you don't want to follow our rules, then quit. My in laws also got super pissed when we went home and stay with my parents instead of with them... but they smoke in their freaking house! We spent ONE night there and my baby basically refused to nurse because she was so stuffed up and couldn't breath when she tried to eat. I'm never dealing with that stress again and I will never stay in their home overnight again and neither will my child. My husband forced the issue for us to stay a night with them but now that we've been through it he completely agrees that we can't do it again.