I haven't done a mock cycle; however, I am still set to do a fresh transfer, so that could change if we do a freeze all or a frozen transfer later on. I had an HSG about a year ago and she didn't think that I needed a follow-up one, which honestly, makes me a bit nervous. What is there is a polyp or something sitting in there that has prevented implantation this whole time?
I'm waiting for the new year too to cycle again. We can have a glass of wine "together" tonight. 
Thank you for thinking of me!
This thread has been closed by the original poster.
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@NorthStar: I explained about the mock "thing" I'm going through in my post right about yours. Please tell me if this is different than what you did. I also did an HSS before my IVF. My uterus(?) was blown up and looked at with ultrasound to see the shape and determine if there would be any issues with transferring the embryos.
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@agold: yeah, we were writing our posts at the same time, so I saw it after I hit 'submit' on mine!
I haven't done a mock cycle; however, I am still set to do a fresh transfer, so that could change if we do a freeze all or a frozen transfer later on. I had an HSG about a year ago and she didn't think that I needed a follow-up one, which honestly, makes me a bit nervous. What is there is a polyp or something sitting in there that has prevented implantation this whole time?
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@NorthStar: I'm bummed I'm working on Columbus Day, so I'm happy to sit typing on Hellobee! I hope you don't have to get to a FET and that your fresh transfer is a success! Wouldn't that be amazing? I wish my fresh transfer worked. I'm basically blocking it all out of my mind because i hate that it didn't work. I did the HSG, also, prior to taking clomid. I think that looks at your fallopian tubes. The HSS looks at your uterus. I could be wayyyyy off and totally wrong. but those are my best guesses.
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@agold: haha! I'm at work, but would rather be on Hellobee! lol. yeah, you are probably right regarding the HSG vs HSS. I'm just paranoid because before we got pregnant with my DD, I had a D&C and Hysterscopy because they thought that I had a polyp in m uterus. They ended up not finding anything; however, I got pregnant right away with DD after that. So, of course, I'm just being paranoid now that we are doing IVF and my HSG was performed by my OB back in Sept 2014. I just need to stop over thinking!!!!
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@NorthStar: Yes, stop overthinking it! Trust your RE or you will drive yourself mad!
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@agold: DH and I love the classic holidays and celebrating them as if we were (or as if we had) kids! He is very into his "displays" (like Chevy Chase in the Lampoon's Christmas movie). I find it totally hilarious, but also very sweet.
That's interesting about your mock cycle and it makes sense... Now I'm worried I'm not doing one! Haha. I know I'm in good company with the rest of the worrywarts on here. I'm actually with you on just trusting the RE to do their job...
My sister and I had a good talk this weekend about letting go of things I have no control over in this process, which is pretty much everything except following the instructions I'm given. Yay for some control there. I feel so much better just accepting what is at the moment. It sounds like you are, too!
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@NorthStar: oh, I love that you grew pumpkins! Are they the right kind for making pies?! I have never tried growing them because my gardens have always been postage stamps and pumpkins take up so much space!
In typical fashion, my nurse/clinic is rather vague when I ask most questions. When I asked when AF should come and if the post-retrieval Lupron would delay it, my nurse replied - "don't worry! it should come soon!" Thanks!!!
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This is a late response to @AMELIABEDILIA re: when to move on from IUI's to IVF. We had the same concerns/thoughts. We did 2 "perfect" IUI's and both negative. I decided, before talking to the RE that I wanted to do a 3rd while we got our ducks in a row for IVF. RE had other thoughts. Said that extended clomid use can compromise uterine lining and if it hasn't worked by now with IUI that it was time to move on. Also, we had $15k of insurance coverage. the longer we putz'ed around with IUI's the more of that $15k we wouldn't have for IVF. So our decision was kind of made for us. While I was putting off IVF, I'm glad we went ahead and dove in. Honestly...now going thru an entire IVF fresh cycle I can say that it wasn't terrible. The worst part(s) were the 3 days bed rest after the transfer (and the lack of information on our embryos between ER and transfer) and the endometrin suppository meds 3x's per day. The shots..while not fun...went quickly and really weren't terrible. The pills...I don't swallow pills so that was a bit challenging but that's my own issue. The wait was expected and never fun...but wasn't terrible. Hopefully you'll feel relieved like we did if and when it's time to move on to IVF.
As for me...this morning at 7am was blood test time. The lab (not at my dr's office) said they would have the results to my dr. within 4-5 hours. Then just have to wait for the dr. to call. While I'd love to be positive...I'm pretty sure I know the answer...that it hasn't worked. I'd love to be pleasantly surprised, but not getting my hopes up. Also, my husband is on shift today (works 24 hour shift) so he won't be here for the call. I offered to let it go to VM and would drive down to him so we could listen together, but he didn't want that either. if it's bad news he wouldn't be able to focus and in his line of work that is dangerous. He'd like me to wait till tomorrow to listen to the VM with him, but I told him that wasn't an option. After 2 years and countless shots, pills, surgeries, appointments, anesthesia...etc. I'm not waiting 10 extra seconds. So I'll know today and he, and everyone else, won't know till tomorrow.
Ironically, my husband got an email this morning with the information for our insurance open enrollment. I wrote our liaison to confirm if our $15k of coverage is per year or lifetime max. She quickly confirmed it is per year. Soooo thankfully...if this doesn't work, we can try again on 1/1/16 (and once a year every year till it works!!!) Relieved to know that today, regardless of the outcome, our road doesn't end here. Thanks Human Resources....your timing is perfect.
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@waiting4you: Today's the day! Thinking of you. That's so cool that the news about the insurance is taking off the pressure just a tad. Wishing you all the best.
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@waiting4you: haven't had a chance to catch up with everything else, but thinking of you today!!!
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@waiting4you: I'm thinking of you too and hoping that you won't need the IVF coverage starting in 2016! Positive thoughts
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@Amorini: no, they were the tiny decorative pumpkins. I probably had over 30 of those and then we did grow jack o lantern pumpkins and got 5 of them. I'm not so sure that I'll do them next year as I'd rather grow stuff that I can cook or bake with (i.e., blueberry plants, tomatoes, etc.).
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@waiting4you: Hi lady. I'm hoping for the best for you.
You can share your news with us here if you want to tell someone sooner! @Amorini: Its a great life skill to be able to let go of things you cannot to control. I try my best. But sometimes I'm just crazy!
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@AMORINI @ENDYMION4 @NORTHSTAR Thank you ladies for your thoughts and well wishes. I can now officially confirm that this cycle has failed. We went from 9 follicles, to 9 eggs, to 5 mature and fertilized to 2 5dt's and nothing to freeze....to a BFN. Frustrating part is that the RE didn't even call...it was the nurse. At 7:15 at night. She said the Dr. would like to speak with me in the morning. I think the entire conversation was 30 seconds long. Would have been nice to hear it from the Dr. oh well...the result is the same.
So, at this point we're taking a solid break from everything IF and will try again in the new year. Going to pack all the meds, books, paperwork, etc. up in a box and put them far from sight. The road doesn't end here....hopefully our day will come.
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@waiting4you: I'm so, so sorry! You don't know me but I'm sending massive hugs anyway.
There is no good way to get this kind of bad news. I hope you guys can just hold each other tight and get through these next few days. Please let us know what your RE says and know we are here for you. Maybe finances will allow you to start sooner, but one way or another, you'll get your BFP. -
@waiting4you: I am so, SO, so very sorry! As you said, the road doesn't end here. Here for you if you need to vent!
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@waiting4you: I'm really sorry about the bad news today. I know how devastating it is, and how hopeless this all can feel sometimes. *hugs*
Question for you: have you confirmed with your insurance and all billing depts. that your 15k has been 100% used up for the year already? I think it was @purplepumps who had a similar situation with a yearly limit she'd thought she'd reached due to the published clinic price for her procedures, but then she found out that there would've been available money leftover to use because the insurance's authorized rate was less than the published clinic rate (or something to that effect). So if you have any left of the 15k, maybe you could use it to pre-buy some meds that you could utilize for your next cycle, or use it to do any further testing that is needed? -
@momazon: Thank you for the info. Yes, unfortunately we've exceeded the 15k for 2015. We have done a year of testing, procedures, IUI's, meds you name it. Honestly was surprised going in to this round of IVF that we had $11k remaining to put towards. On a good note, I have meds left over (especially the crazy expensive Gonal F) so it should cost us less next time. We've had to pay about $5k out of pocket for IVF this time because of the running over of the $15k.
A few things that I'll throw out here for everyone...- I did acupuncture with an infertility acupuncturist. She works closely with a lot of the RE's in our area. Unfortunately our dr. is not in the area, but because insurance pays for it, we go to him. He's not the best, and she's let me know that. However, she's close friends with one of the RE's whom she's discussed my details with. Once I let her know this failed, she said the RE told her a specific question I need to ask the embryologist: Ask whether or not they saw cumulus complexes. If they did, it suggests premature ovulation so maybe they need a shorter trigger and retrieval. If there were no cumulus complexes, they might need a longer interval.
The acupuncturist also said that she wants me to go see this RE for a second opinion even though both she and that RE know that I won't be making the switch due to insurance reasons. That it could provide some good insight.
My question to you girls is....should I get this second opinion? I feel like this is the case of "don't try on the gorgeous wedding dress you know you can't afford because you'll fall in love with it and you can't have it". What if I love this RE (who's much closer to my home), but to see her we'll have to come up with $20k.Also, what are everybodys thoughts on PGS/PGD testing? If you did it, what did it cost you?
I'd love to know if there are other things that could be tested for, but I honestly think other than PGS/PGD, we've tested for just about everything.
Thanks for the support ladies. Looking forward to having my husband home this morning to give him a big hug.
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@waiting4you: I am so sorry it did not work out. I know how devastating that can be. I would get the second opinion (this is coming from someone who has seen *five* REs in the last 5 years). But I have always found it reassuring when they overlap in recommendations and fodder for good discussion when they don't. My first two clinics were very much "by the books" kind of clinics and did not look at you as a person so I found it helpful when I found a doctor who would look at my case individually. Ultimately, my last doctor was another factory type one, but I felt better able to advocate for myself based on my experience with doctors who had given that more individualized experience.
As for pgd/pgs- I had have had two losses and a failed FET and my doctor still felt it was not necessary for me to consider pgd for this last cycle, mainly bc it was so cost prohibitive and insurance won't cover it.However if you have the money it definitely increases your odds for success. My doctor said it takes a 50% success rate and turns it into an 80% success rate. That was so tempting but ultimately we could not pull the trigger on the money. However, had this most recent cycle not worked out, my husband and I would have done it for our next Ivf.
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@waiting4you: oh no, hun! I'm so, so sorry and know that we cannot say anything to make you and your DH feel any better. Thinking of you while you decide how to proceed
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@waiting4you: So sorry to hear! Big hugs!
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@waiting4you: I'm so very very sorry that this IVF cycle didn't work out for you.
It's so tough and I'm right there with you. At the very least, one very good thing is that you have IF insurance coverage and you can start again January 1st! That is really not that far away. I, personally, would welcome a couple months of a break. As for getting a second opinion, I honestly don't know what I'd do. I would probably definitely stay with the RE your insurance covers. Will that RE be receptive to you telling him what the other second-opinion RE says?
As for genetic testing, I thought for a hot second that I would get it done, but then realized it was expensive - like over $5,000. I will get you the exact cost when I get home. I haven't been told I need to have it done, so I'm absolutely skipping it at this point. I always see genetic testing knocking out embryos - not doing anything to make the embryos better.
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@waiting4you: If it would help you to have peace of mind or simply more information for your future IVFs, a second opinion couldn't hurt.
I tried to ask my embryologist a few questions about things like how the eggs/embryos looked while under the microscope. I'll write more about it sometime. I'd love to hear what others have gleaned from those conversations.
@jaguar: Thinking about you with your FET today!
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@waiting4You: I'm just seeing this.(been off the boards for several days) I'm so sorry. I don't have anything to add, just know you're in my thoughts. Oh, and I do believe that a second opinion wouldn't hurt.
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@Waiting4You: Wait, I do have something to add about testing. I think testing is important if you are older and your egg quality has declined (like me) OR you are running out of time because of insurance. If they can get enough eggs to test ( IMO, at least 4) it's worth it because once you get pregnant (and I'm really hoping you will) you want to give that pregnancy the best shot with the BEST eggs that are likely to stick.
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@waiting4you: I'm so sorry
I'm waiting for the new year too to cycle again. We can have a glass of wine "together" tonight. I haven't gotten to the point where I could even do PGD, and had enough embryos, I'd do it. If i had say 4-6, I think I'd just take my chances to save some money on testing. But If I had much more than that, then I think it'd be worth.
@momazon: Wow, you have amazing memory!!I'm about 11dpo now. Still waiting on CD1 to schedule a last minute trip to CO. I just discovered though that IVM may still be considered "experimental", so I'm not even sure insurance would cover that. Ugh. But we're still going to go through with the diagnostic testing since that should be covered.
I just got the bill for what I think is the ICSI portion of my last two IVF cycles. My insurance discounted it all and my clinic had been fighting it. Since I used up my max already, it basically meant that insurance would reject it all, and it would fall on me to pay. So I'd been prepping to get like a $4500 bill, which is what they were charging insurance. But when I got the bill, it was only 700/cycle. I owe only 1400 instead of 4500. It still sucks, but sucks a lot less. -
@waiting4you: I'm in the camp of getting a second opinion may be helpful--it could confirm what your RE is doing and making you feel more confident going into the next cycle. OR, it could bring up some helpful questions to have with your RE before going into your next cycle. Medicine, though a science, is so not an exact science, so sometimes someone might hear something in your story that makes them think of something. We have another doc in mind that we may go to for a 2nd opinion if this cycle doesn't work, and if our RE doesn't have anything different to say about it.
We did PGS because I've had 3 unexplained m/cs in the last little over a year. I don't have the cost in front of me, but it was somewhere in the $6-8K range (and we are completely out of pocket for IVF). On the one hand we are hoping the m/cs were "just" a chromosome issue, and with one of the 'normals" we'll have better luck. On the other hand, we ended up with 4 "normal," which is way more than anyone was expecting, so now i'm not convinced that is the issue. Like all other testing, it can sometimes raise more questions. But for us, it was worth it because if the cycle doesn't work, we know that wasn't the issue.
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@jaguar: Oops, I'm a day off, I just realized. GL tomorrow!
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@endymion4: Have you been tested for autoimmune issues? I have them and it's often missed.
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@AmeliaBedilia: My allergist ran an autoimmune panel, and nothing came up. Ever since I had my daughter, i've developed allergies to certain foods, had rashes that won't go away, etc, so there's definitely something going on, but nothing diagnosed.
Did your protocol/meds change at all as a result of the autoimmune issues?
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@waitingforyou: I'm sorry you didn't get your BFP this cycle. I'm so glad for you that you have more chances ahead though! (And honestly a little jealous of those with insurance covered fertility treatments).Your story hit close to home and elevated me from lurker status to bona fide poster.
Am in the process of IVF #1 after 4 failed IUIs. After ER yesterday I had high hopes- 13 follicles retrieved. We did 7 ICSI and 6 natural since DH has always had totally normal SA. Of the 7 ICSI, 4 fertilized normally and 3 "could go either way"(I guess they didn't see what they were hoping for on day 1 but that it's possible to miss it so they keep observing them). Of the 6 natural, 4 were immature and the other 2 did not fertilize at all. Which kind of drives me crazy since I've always believed it's been a problem with me and have been through the ringer with invasive tests and procedures, to think that it could have been an undiagnosed male factor all along.... And how quickly hopes for 13 dwindle to 4 that still need to survive to day 5... Trying to stay positive and count my blessings that I have 4 hopefuls which is closer than I've ever been. I think the saying, "Don't count your eggs until they're hatched" is something I need to remind myself with every cycle so I don't get ahead of myself (which I inevitably do--was picking out strollers after the retrieval lol). -
@waiting4you: I am so sorry. Sending you lots of hugs. For what it's worth, most clinics tell us that MOST women (read: most) get their BFP within three cycles. It took me 2 for Georgia.. but this is #3 for baby dos, and no luck there. I guess it really is just random. The $$$ aspect of that is the worst.
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@Amorini: Nope, you weren't! We had our 4-day transfer this morning.
Thank you for thinking of me!Here's our squishy.
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@jaguar: I think that looks like an amazing embryo!!!!!!! I am hoping with all I have that that little squishy is Georgia's little sister or brother.
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@agold: Oh hun, thank you! This is the nicest embryo we've had since Georgia's. (Hers was still WAY better, but not comparing.) ... so excited to have a blasty on board, even if it's an early one.
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@jaguar: good looking embryo! Fingers crossed very tightly for you that this is it!
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@jaguar: Hey, thanks to the time difference, I was right on time! FX-ed this is one is sticky and unstoppable! So glad the FET wait is over for you and now you have this 2ww to focus on.... So much
@Mrs. Peacock: Congrats on your ER and welcome! Different circumstances but I know how hard the number drop is, having gone from 22 eggs retrieved to 2 frozen embies in a snap... it's one of the biggest challenge of this process so far for me. Hoping your four (or seven) keep growing and you have some nice ones on day 5! Are you planning on doing a fresh transfer?
AFM, I'm about 14 days past ER and AF is here. Hopefully I'll get a FET plan and schedule today or very soon.
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@Mrs. Peacock: I'm so glad that you've decided to post and let us hear your story as well. I agree, the hardest part of all this is hearing the numbers dwindle. I'm a bit jealous that you had enough eggs that they were even willing to let you try some natural/non-ICSI fertilization. We did not have enough and they said it would be a waste of our time and money to try any natural as it would be just like repeating the 2 IUI's with 4+ follicles that didn't work out. You're right...it's soooo hard not to get ahead of ourselves during all this. I, like you, went out and purchased the sweetest little outfit for a baby girl to try to be positive and keep my hopes up that this was going to be "it". (I chose a girl outfit because my husbands partner at work is having a little girl in March, so I knew I could gift it to her if this didn't work out). I'll say lots prayers that your 4 make it to day 5 and you've got healthy embies to freeze!!!
As a follow up...I have a call scheduled with my RE today at 11:15 to discuss the failed cycle. Very curious to see what he has to say. In the meantime, it's back to the gym for me today and my margarita at dinner last night was AMAZING.
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@jaguar: Your squishy looks absolutely beautiful! I hope that you are feeling better about this one and try to keep the positive thoughts up
@Mrs. Peacock: I'm so sorry to hear about what you've been through and hope that those embies that you do have will be the lucky ones. Are you doing a fresh or frozen transfer?
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@Jaguar -- congrats on your squishy. Sending you good thoughts.
@MrsPeacock: Welcome and thanks for sharing your story. Here's to those lovely four!
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