Hellobee Boards

@GreenThumb: I was offline yesterday and I'm sorry to hear about the vanishing twin. I'm thankful the other one is ok, but I know that doesn't lessen the pain any further. Thinking of you..

@PurplePumps: Lots of hugs coming your way as you move forward. I know that it will take time for the pain to lessen..

@NorthStar: Thank you for your thoughts... as always with IF, taking it one day at a time. How are things going for you?!

@LoveHope: I'm sorry to hear that you have to join us, but I agree that it is so helpful to have the support of everyone here. Wishing you much success!!

@NorthStar: It is right around the corner!! I'll be cheering you on!

@LoveHope: Welcome, and I echo all of the other ladies that this is a place of tremendous support!

@NorthStar: May 31st will be here before you know it! xo

-No results today. Kind of annoyed but half expected it. I feel like deadlines and dates never get hit. But tonight I was told tomorrow morning, so we'll see.

@LoveHope: I would do icsi even if you had to pay out of pocket.

@LoveHope: We did icsi (it's almost standard at my RE's clinic) and had a really good fert report. Out of 13, 11 fertilized. Obviously I don't know what it would have been left to their own devices But I was very happy with that.

@SweetiePie: Oh, I am so sorry to hear about your results. I absolutely understand where you are coming from about hoping you could accept being a family of three, but once that darn bit of hope slips back in, it is hard to know when enough is enough. I'm hoping you can find peace and acceptance with whatever decision you make. It is all so incredibly sad and unfair.

@LoveHope: We did ICSI because DH had low morphology, but I would definitely at least have your DH do the semen analysis again and then decide. I've also heard of couples doing partial natural fertilization, partial ICSI if there are enough eggs retrieved to justify trying that. You are going through a lot with IVF, so it is important to make every decision count - even if you have to pay for it.

@GreenThumb: @agold: Thank you both so much. Sometimes all you want to hear is "this sucks, I know how you feel".
On the positive side, my husband has been so kind today after hearing the news. He's usually very cut and dry and not very emotional (I was expecting a "see, I told you not to get your hopes up"), and he's just been so sweet with sending me little texts about how happy we'll be either way and what a great mom I am. I really needed that from him.

I know it'll be ok, its just trying to figure out what to do next that is the hard part.

@LovelyPlum: thanks, friend

@SweetiePie: I think that the "i know how you feel" comment is one of the best and only comfort comments that us IF girls can give and receive. And kudos to your husband for stepping up and saying the right things at just the right time.

@NorthStar: I'm already thinking about LO#2 and I know I will be having the same feelings you just expressed. I'm thinking i will just do one IVF cycle and, if it doesn't work, resort back to fun sex and praying for a miracle.

@NorthStar: Sadly, I still have yet to return to fun sex. That's a whole different story for a different thread! But baby is doing so well, I think! Thank you for the well wishes. I really wish you all the best as you move forward with your family plans.

@PurplePumps: it might be that you're still dilated from the D&C? I think that's why they want nothing in there. Infection because you're "open" and maybe pain is the body's defense mechanism? Totally guessing!

@PurplePumps: ohhhhh ok. Well I'm glad that's the case because doing it after the D&C made me nervous!
Could it be the buildup from the crinone? I remember when I was on crinone if I had too much buildup and I tried to put a new one in (applicator) I'd hit resistance and it felt painful. And then I had to "clean out".
Also your cervix might have been irritated?
Definitely wait as long as you need to try again. I think it took me a couple of months post D&C to feel ready. If it's less for you, great. If it's more that's ok too!

@SweetiePie: @PurplePumps: omg, ladies. Laughter through the tears. You know you've been through hella IVF when... Someone should start that list.

@PurplePumps: I do think the Crinone would make it more tender down there. Higher P right before my period (even in a natural cycle before IVF) I think made that happen before for me.

@agold: I know you were on pelvic rest for awhile. Are you still? My poor DH. We haven't done it regularly in a looong time. BCPs, Lupron, stimming, over-stimming, freaking-out ovaries, Crinone, early BFP paranoia... Now I'm just uncomfortable (20+w). We snuck in a session here and there but IVF and the MFI diagnosis, in a more psychological way for him, have really screwed with our sex life. Next up: a kiddo! We'll get back there. I just feel guilty.

@SweetiePie: I'm sorry about.the news on your embie. You can unload here all you want and need. I'm so glad your DH is being emotionally present for you. We all know it's not most guys' forte. I also know no one IRL who has gone through this (or any kind of IF) so I felt/feel so alone except here among ladies who have been there. My LO #1 is only half-cooked but I'm 99.9% sure we will be one and done, due to my age and MFI and having IVF as our only option. There are no more snowbabies and there won't be a "reset" or a super swimmer surprise!! Let alone the grueling physical and emotional aspects, doing IVF all again and paying oop for decreased odds is pretty much unthinkable. This effects me and saddens me more than I really want to admit. Like you, I feel pretty alone in the IF reality. Most people at my age are done and/or are content with their gaggle of kids and are preventing future pregnancies... not quietly pining for what might have been and not have had much of a choice in the matter. I'm so grateful that I am pregnant, so grateful IVF was even an option for us and really just hoping that all will continue to go well...but I also foresee some therapy for me around this whole issue... Sending you lots of

@NorthStar: Thinking about and your upcoming FET!

@LoveHope: We for sure did ICSI because our main challenge was MFI. I'd have your DH test again just to have the confirmation, but I probably would also pay OOP for ICSI -- and anything else that might increase the odds -- if I were you.

@Winnie13: Sorry that you have to do IVF but welcome and best of luck to you! I never attended a class but I'd just make sure you know who/how you can have any post-class questions answered. Something(s) will inevitably come up! I had one nurse who all my q's went through and was happy we could handle most things via email.

Thank you ladies!! I appreciate it! I'm sure I'll have a 1000 questions once I get my schedule and all my meds! I'm familiar with some of the IVF "stuff" as my SIL has done 4 fresh IVF's and 1 frozen. She is about to do her 2nd frozen in July. She has had 2 miscarriages and 2 chemicals and she still has the strength to move forward. I definitely am looking to her during these next couple of months. Not that I would wish this path on anyone, but it's comforting to be going through a cycle together.

@purplepumps: I'm so sorry to read about your loss. Praying for your healing physically and emotionally.

@sweetiepie: I'm so sorry about your embie! Praying you have some direction on what to do next.

@greenthumb: I'm sorry to hear about your twin. Praying for you and your sweet baby!

@agold: Girl, I feel you. When I was pregnant I was horny All. The. Time. But he just wasn't into it. He felt like he would poke the baby. And I had to explain that in order to poke the baby he needed a 12 inch penis. Spoiler alert: a 12 inch penis he does not have. And I think he was hurt when I said that because in their own minds, all men have a foot-long weiner.
ETA: now I feel bad, it's more than fine. But...not enough to poke a baby in the head.

So, we basically went a year without sex (pregnancy plus a few months after I wasn't into it). But we eventually got back in the groove. And then out again. We've always had ebbs and flows in that department (it's been 17 years of togetherness, enough said) so we're ok with it.
You guys will be ok too

@NorthStar: do we have the same husband? I hope not Same situation where I am always the initiator and he'll always oblige, But he doesn't initiate. Like maybe once a year he will, haha. It's funny, that's his personality with everything. Even going out to dinner with friends or taking a guy trip - he'll never start the conversation, but if someone says "hey lets go get drinks tomorrow" he'll always say yes. He jokes that socially he's not a leader, he's a follower. But at work he's the total opposite, he's the head of his department.
Anyway, off topic. I digress.