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@Raindrop: I did well in school too, but observing schools and workplaces today, they seem to push extroversion way more than we were kids, which is why DH and I started talking about it. I want to honor my son's inclinations but I also want to teach him to "turn it on" when necessary for his benefit - which is what my parents did for me.

@Raindrop: My parents were the same - immigrants working nonstop. But they saw pretty early on that I only liked having like 1-2 friends at a time, that I really loved coming home from school and reading books, or riding bikes alone through the park, and they were afraid I was going to be too introverted for my own good. I think the one thing they really talked a lot about was that sometimes we have to do uncomfortable things to make our life better.

So they made me do a few activities that would occupy me while they worked, but that had a good introvert/extrovert balance, like orchestra/band, which was an individual task done in a group setting. Dance team and cheer was like that too - you need individual skill, but you have to do it in a group setting to "succeed." Church was also a non-negotiable, so we were always in group settings and doing group activities for that, but again, it was a good balance because they were familiar faces I saw every week so it wasn't as overwhelming. Occasionally, my folks would also force me to do a really uncomfortable task, like a public speaking contest or Bible quiz once or twice a year, just because I needed to learn. Over time, it helped me make my own decisions about activities too. Foreign language was one. Its something you have to work hard towards yourself, but you really don't get fluent until you start conversing frequently with other people and you don't get to learn that culture until you really try to branch out and explore a country or community that speaks that language. So after 6, 7 years of learning French, studying abroad was something I independently decided to do to better myself, even though I knew I would find it really hard. And it was! Super mentally and emotionally draining. But I never once regretted doing it.

I really credit my parent's approach to helping me be a social introvert. When I tell people I'm an introvert, they are really surprised because I can speak well in public and socialize in big group settings, etc. But I find it really exhausting and need a lot of decompression time. I want to make sure I'm cognizant of that in my son and be able to be a good advocate for him in a school setting so that he's not pushed aside or mowed over.