Any bad language? Behaviors? Sad stories?
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DS started preschool this year...
Within the first week, he found out his new-friend's dad died, apparently from falling asleep on the couch with a blanket over his head; not sure on the real reason but we've heard he's had a rough life already (poor kid!).
Same friend told ds he was 'dumb as shit', which LO wasn't phased by and asked before he repeated what was said, it makes me sad that the friend is hearing that language!
This week another friend apparently had a bad day and was calling everyone names, and said 'f#cktard'. I appreciate that DS know's its a bad word that we don't say, and asks before he repeats it.It honestly makes me more sad than anything that these other kids hear that language! And I appreciate hearing from LO's teacher that he is super nice/sweet/friendly to everyone at school, even if they're having a bad day / not nice back.
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Language is the big one for me. In part it’s the bad or inappropriate words that we are not okay with DD saying. (Though not the types of words you shared - mostly things like stupid, hate, butthead, and similar) But also just how some of them communicate - baby talk, whining to get their way, etc. One of her friends last year tried to teach DD to cry to get her way because it’s what works for her. We had a long chat about that. This year one kid has decided he hates preschool and that it’s for babies. He has been so negative and DD was repeating it, even though she LOVES school. So again lots of chatting about why her friend might feel that way, how she could make him feel better, that it’s okay to not play with him when he is grumpy, and that she can love school even if someone else doesn’t.
Overall we are very lucky at DD’s preschool. We parent the same way as most of the other families when it comes to the big things. And for the other things we just talk a lot about how different families have different rules, and that’s okay, but we have to follow our rules.
In your case though, I agree, it would make me sad that parents or caregivers are speaking like that to or around the kids.
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So far *knock on wood* she hasn't repeated any bad words, but there def have been characters/concepts that I wasn't happy with that I know she got it through school (she told me). I can't remember exactly what. It was all more preschool/prek though; kindergarten has been fine so far, I think!
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@josina: Oh my gosh! My DS is also in preschool, but the words he repeats are "meanie," "stupid," etc.
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So, my daughter's daycare does ALL THINGS WITCHES around Halloween. We are a Christian family and I would prefer that it was about pumpkins, harvest, etc. I actually love Halloween, but does it have to be just witches?
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@crazydoglady: @catgirl: A lot of the kids in our district are low-income, not that I want to blame it on that. And the worst is that he's actually hearing it from pre-school friends vs. on the bus from the older kids!
@crazydoglady: I was suprised but our preschool didn't do halloween at all, just a 'fall theme'. -
My son talk about the "bad guy coming" (Waldorf Pre-K) 🙄. Also he learned to chant "you can't come in! You can't come in!" Mean.
But he also shouted "Fire in the hole!!" (From Blippi 🙄) and his teacher was not happy about that.
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Bad guys and guns. Not sure where he got it, though. We are 100% anti-that in our household.
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Oh yes. DS started PreK this year and immediately started coming home saying girls can’t play with him/that he’s in an all boys play club. At 3.5!!!
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Yep bad guys and guns and shooting. Plus:
‘You’re not my friend anymore’
‘my picture/toy/whatever is better than yours!’
‘I don’t CARE!’
We’ve also had ‘so and so says f—k’ and poopy head, dumb, etc. He’s only in SK! -
DD is obsessed with firetrucks and firefighters. At one time, she thought she had to become a boy before she could become a firefighter. Just as we overcame that, she wore her firetruck shirt to school and a girl told her it was a boy's shirt. DD said "I'm just not gonna listen to her!"
We live in an area with prevalent deer hunting and I come from a family of hunters. One day, DD came home describing a story told by a classmate that detailed harvesting a deer. It was graphic and used very blunt, callous words. Not at all how I would describe it to a 4 year old.
She also learned the word "hate" at school and comes home talking in a whiney baby voice after spending time with my niece, neither of which are tolerated in our house.
@pachamama: bah! What Blippi episode is that?! Will have to remember to skip!
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DD is 3 and started preschool two days a week and she came home recently with the word "die". Ugh. Its not the worst, but its an entire concept that I don't want to deal with at her age.
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@SweetCaroline: do you have any Princess Awesome clothes? They have a firefighter dress that might be perfect for your dd!
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DD (newly four) has definitely picked up a lot of gender stereotyping from kids at school, though she is thankfully very talkative about it, giving me plenty of opportunities to shape her understandings.
"Bad guys" have also figured prominently in playground play recently, though I am still not totally certain what her conception of them is.
Any and all bad language, she picks up at home.
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@lady baltimore: true for me too. I have a filthy mouth and for some reason I cannot contain it! He pretty much reprimands ME now but he loves saying "dickhead" and "f*cking Christ" when he's feeling super naughty 🥺
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Preschool- spitting, biting. My Lo didn’t have a clue about these until it happened to him.
He hasn’t done it in a long time because even though it’s “developmental “ I’m not having that. So a lot of time outs and talking about good behaviors has stopped it so far.
I wasn’t happy when he learned about spitting. I saw the little brat who was doing it in the Director’s office quite a few times for it!
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Oy... die and kill games... I really don't like!! "mommy, josh said he was going to kill me" ….ugh really?!?!?!? That's just not right people. I wish that wasn't the word they'd use.
Also DD came home all upset about the prince who got his head cut off and then became an elephant boy and also a monkey boy … I found out it was incorporated into different teachings of Christmas i think and it's from the hindu religion?? but really to tell at 4 yr old that a prince got his head cut off and then they put an elephant head on him?!?!?!? eek
oh and DD also came home and asked what the middle finger meant bc the older boys were telling her to show it to the teachers.
We are unique in that we do swear in our home and DD does know what bad words are, she could give you a list if you asked her to (would include stupid and idiot
) but she knows that goodies too but she also knows she isn't supposed to say them. So swear words aren't really a concern to us bc she already knows them. HAETA: phew.. just read all comments and yes about swear words @lady Baltimore and @pachamama
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Scary stories! Last year there was a story circulating among the kids about Pennywise the clown living in the school's basement and stealing kids. And adults can't see him, so pointing out there's nothing in the vent where he lives wasn't helping. Just... what?! DS was pretty terrified and couldn't sleep at night. This year I haven't heard any specific stories yet, but he's having trouble sleeping again so I suspect the kids are trading horror stories again
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@DesertDreams88: @muffinsmuffins: @Ajsmommy: yeah, this. My kid just turned 3 and started at a public grant-funded pre-k program this fall. The other day on the playground he picked up a stick, pointed it at me and said, bang bang, this is my gun, you're dead. I thought we'd at least make it until kindergarten with that bullshit.
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@lady baltimore: @pachamama: @Ajsmommy: I'm sure DS hears plenty of swear words out of my mouth too, lol, so want to clarify the part that makes me sad is calling someone 'dumb as shit' or a 'fucktard'. I guess we don't use the bad words in that context.
Last week out of the blue DS put 2 quarters on his eyes and said, 'look, I'm a dickhead!'. I couldn't help but laugh, like where did he get that and how do the two go together!?
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The biggest thing that stands out to me is having to discuss religion with my first grader because it was prompted by a conversation in her class (public school) about how different winter holidays are tied to religious traditions. We managed to turn it into a good academic conversation about origins of holidays and different religions and their traditions, but I wasn't expecting her to come home and ask why we don't have a religion or believe in God (which apparently a kid told her is the case because we don't go to church, like 99% of her classmates do).
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@josina: my 7 year old picks up a lot of sassy attitude from school and also learns lyrics to songs I would rather she didn't sing
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@crazydoglady: Oh yess this jogged my memory, DD1 was in either preschool or prek and she came home talking about zombies
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@josina: That's a fair point. LO (newly 4) hasn't yet picked up any foul language outside of our home, that I have noticed, but I'll be pretty upset if/when she comes home having heard the n- or r-words, or calling someone a pussy. Those are very different than when she hears (or echoes) a "dammit" over a spill.
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I got worried last night when I thought DS was saying "I love pot", like oh god, who is teaching him THAT at school.
Turns out he was saying "I love pop" (which he only gets when he 'sneaks' my open cans).
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@agold: the death thing is hard though. My fil died a couple of weeks ago so we’ve been having a lot of conversations about things. Things like, “I don’t want to die, but Pappi wanted to die.” Not easy conversations to have with a 3-year-old, so who knows what he’s saying at school.
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DS has started singing Old Town Road all.the.time. I can't stand it because of how often it gets played and now it's been stuck in my head the past week...
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@JennyPenny: lol. DS's favorite song and he says all the kids at school know it too.
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DD was talking yesterday that some kids think their parents are Santa and that their mom's dress up as Mrs. Santa... why would the parents do that... ??? LOL
She's only in K, it seems that magic doesn't last quite as long as it used to....
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@josina: lololol dickhead is my personal favorite
. I like the quarter detail.
@SweetCaroline: It's one of the museum episodes, where he goes into a pirate ship. -
So the bad language is really starting to annoy me... last night DS told me a boy said shit head and dick head and dumb as shit. It's happening at wrap-care, no not actually preschool. I told his teacher and she said she's trying to stop it.
I feel like if they can't stop it they should just kick the kid out of wrap care! I'm just glad DS know's they're bad words and this kid is a bad kid to say them. -
@josina: I'd almost be more concerned about having the kid at home than at wrap care if this is the kind of language he is hearing. I, of course, don't know this child nor his family nor his situation, but I feel the need to pipe in to say that I doubt he is a "bad" kid, just a kid in a bad situation. Feel free to disregard my opinion, I just had to say it.
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@meganmp: I totally get it! I do feel sorry for the kid(s) since it's a couple of them, just hope the teacher's are talking to their parents about it. These kids are calling my kid these names - luckily he doesn't seem too bothered by it but my mama bear instincts kick in.
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My son spent his first year at preschool only socializing with a group of three sweet little girls. This year, the girls are gone and the class is mostly boys. I see a huge difference in his aggressive behavior during play. There have been several "incidents" at school that involve him getting hit or shoved or smashed and while I don't hold it against any of the other kids, I do kind of wish that he was hanging out with the girls again instead.
Oh, and turning everything into guns. I hate that so much.
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@josina: Matthew is a follower and picks up a lot of what the other kids do in school, whether it's climbing all over the playground equipment (his teachers don't like for them to get on top of the tunnel to the slide) or words like poopie head from the boy that's 2 months older than him. We constantly have to say that just because so & so at school does X, doesn't mean we do it too. Not looking forward to Kindergarten at this point. LOL
) but she knows that goodies too but she also knows she isn't supposed to say them. So swear words aren't really a concern to us bc she already knows them. HA
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