Hellobee Boards

I think one day a week is something I would consider doing with MIL. I think I had a post way back when panicking about this issue. I had been in camp "no way"... but am starting to reevaluate my position. For me, it was more of a "I'm freaking out because I have no idea if you're going to ignore our wishes and start implementing things that were OK in the 1970s" (sleeping on tummy for example - and I"m just pulling an example out of thin air here. Insert anything that worked in the 1970s that doesn't "fly" today.)
But I think that I'd trust my MIL once per week while baby is not mobile. Once running, I wouldn't. She has trouble walking and wouldn't be able to keep up.

@grizz: OMG you get a "no way on your MIL" vote from me too! Lol

Nope. They smoke and have a hard enough time following our rules about protecting baby when we are with them. I would never trust them alone with her.

Nope. I don't think it's fair to ask my parents or DHs parents to take care of our child. They have already raised their children, they should enjoy their retirement.

No, I don't think it is fair to our parents and I prefer the structure of daycare.

@littlek: In lots of cultures, grandparents actually play a huge role in raising kids while the parents are working and it's totally normal. I also wouldn't want my mom to have full-time care of LO, but she's said many times that she wouldn't mind at all; when she was a kid and both her parents worked, her grandmother and great-aunt lived with them and took care of my mom and uncle, and when I was a baby, both my parents worked and my maternal grandparents had me 4 days/week and my paternal grandparents had me 1.5 days/week.
I don't think it's good to EXPECT that your parents will do it (and like I said, while it's probably an option for us, we've enrolled LO in daycare and my mom just watches him when daycare is closed or he is sick or something), but I think there are plenty of grandparents who honestly welcome the chance and feel like it's a way they can continue to contribute to the family.

No, other than nobody lives close to us, my parents still work and my IL's have earned their retirement and freedom. I would never ask for care on a regular basis, but every so often I'd be fine with either set of grandparents watching him for a date night or a work meeting.

If they lived closer, I don't see why not.

I don't trust my own parents watching LO but would trust my FIL. Since I'm pregnant, he plans on taking LO for the day on his days off to give me a break. Notice how I said FIL and not MIL... she is crazy and would spend all day watching dramas and making LO watch his own shows on the iPad (yes, this has happened).

Hell to the no on the ILs. BUT, my parents watch him 3x a week. Thats fine by both of us

my mom watches DS once a week, and MIL once every other week. the grandparents(either my mom, or his parents) are usually our first go to for babysitting, when we need one.

My MIL is great. I wouldn't hesitate to ask her, but she's an hour away and I didn't want to ask her to do it regularly because she has a dog and I don't think she wanted the commitment when T was so young and needy. She fills in for my mom (who watches T every Tuesday) when my mom has a conflict. When T is older, I can totally see her taking him after pre-school or whatever for the rest of the afternoon. She's also watched him overnight.

No way, my MIL/FIL will never watch LO, even if they lived next door! They are chain smokers and alcoholics, and there is no way in heck I'd ever let LO spend any time there unsupervised. They are sweet people, but I honestly don't trust them to a) set a good example and b) not smoke directly at LO. Sucks! My BIL/SIL, however, do live about 15 mins away, and they are welcome to watch her anytime!

@Lozza: True in some cultures. In reality, my parents live 8 hours away, so this is not even a conversation DH and I will ever have. DH's mom lives 9 hours away and is very irresponsible and DH's dad is an absentee dad who can't even bother to return his son's phone calls, much less watch our son. If my parents lived closer, I'm sure they would love to watch LO from time to time but I would still keep LO in daycare because I like the structure and I know taking care of a young child is hard and my parents are just now finally retiring and I want them to enjoy their retirement.

@Lozza: I plan on being one of the grandmothers you describe. I really hope I get the chance to be a grandma and take care of my grandchildren regularly! I plan to move wherever my son and his future family are so we can be around to help. (But I promise I will give my son and future daughter-in-law plenty of space if they want it!)

I don't get the people who think grandparents are "retired" from watching children and wouldn't want to babysit for their grand kids. My MIL watches my LO 1-2 days a week. She lives and breathes for it. Same with my friend's mom who watches her son every day. Same with my other friend's mom. MY mom lives two hours away, but will drive over to babysit for the day if we need someone. She loves my LO and never feels like she gets enough time with him.
Grandparents WANT that time with their grand kids. Plus, think about how wonderful it is to be around a little one- I'm sure they miss that feeling too of watching a little one grow and discover.
Plus, I love the money we save. Everyone wins!!

My inlaws live far away, so it's not an option thankfully. I don't trust them to look after LO for long stretches. They're smokers. They also pride themselves on sleeping in like it's the best character trait in the world. Not kidding. It would be pulling teeth to get them ready to care for an infant.

The most they've been alone with him has been a couple of hours. When we visited them, LO got overfed (IMO) by them. They wanted to feed him Cheerios and other food we had to constantly tell them not to.

I trust my parents to watch LO. They watch my nieces and nephews. They work well to impose structure, schedule, and discipline.

Neither of our families live close by, so this won't be an option for us. But, when we were growing up, my dad's mom watched us all the time. Both of our grandmothers did, actually. We liked going to my dad's mom because she also watched our cousins, which means we got to play with them when we went over. We enjoyed it, but I can't speak to whether or not they listened to our parents' rules. I know we went for years, though, so I guess so?