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@HappyBluebird: Scorpio.
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@simplyfelicity: scorpios are pretty cool too
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Hugs to those of you struggling. I've had a few tears already today, with the 15th remembrance stuff.
My positive news: transfer Saturday! And my hubby was supposed to be flying back to the USA for work.... is now HOME for it. They've cancelled the second half of his conference, so he gets to come along now. I hope this is a good omen!
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@jaguar: I am so happy that everything is working out so far.
And hugs that today is so hard...I am putting off going to get my two candles. -
@jaguar: so glad your hubby gets to come along
I think we are going to light a candle tomorrow for the 15th. I had no idea about it until a couple days ago.
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I won't be home tomorrow night to light a candle, but it might be good for me to get out anyway. A friend is coming in from out of town
And the angel I received today is carrying a candle, so I'm realizing it's even more appropriate!
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@MaryM: How beautiful. I love that one!
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@MaryM: She's a beauty.
I sent a friend who had a pregnancy loss at 6 weeks the other week a Willowtree figurine, because I love them so much.
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@MaryM: How beautiful!
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@MaryM: love that! I've seen those in the store but never bought one. They are beautiful
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Sitting in the drs office waiting to have my blood drawn and its a little like torture having to sit around 5 pregnant ladies with big belies
Can't wait to get out of here!
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@HappyBluebird: That is always rough... Hopefully you can get in and out of there soon!
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@FliegepilzHut: I wish I could just go to the lab directly instead of the office! I am back at work and I'm on my own here today so I can enjoy the quiet and get some work done!
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@HappyBluebird: Oh man. I feel so bad for you.
For one of my last draws, the doctor forgot to give the receptioninst my paperwork so I had to sit and wait for it (instead of going straight to lab like usual)
Well it was busy, and I ended up waiting 20 minutes watching women ooh and ahh over their sonogram pictures.
I nearly left in tears. I was SO mad.
Hopefully your numbers are coming down and you won't have to go back!
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@HappyBluebird: Yeah...maybe you could, if you needed to go again! I thought about doing that (had LOTS of beta checks, follow-up labs, etc)...but ultimately maybe the "desensitization" process was good for me? I'm eager to get my SHG done next week...but kind of dreading being in my RE's office, since the last time I was there (for an early US) was so hard...
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@MaryM: That's the worst! Thankfully none of these pregnant ladies were very talkative so I'm sure it could have been much worse today. I'm definitely hoping I can stop going so often soon and depending on the pathology results maybe I can stop all together! Wishful thinking maybe but I'm trying to be more positive!
@FliegepilzHut: I hope your SHG and visit to the RE goes smoothly. Its certainly not easy going back in the office. Fingers crossed for you!
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@HappyBluebird: Thank you!
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Hey all! I'm just stopping in to wish everyone love and hugs today for the remembrance stuff. I actually took the day off of work (DS had his first school trip this morning). It's a good day for extra cuddles and I can't stop obsessing over this tww as well as the mc.
to each of you!!
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@ValentineMommy:
to you too! I hope being off helps you occupy your mind with other things!
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Dropping in to say hi and send hugs
to everyone today. I hope you all take a moment to remember your special baby/ies, but also to commend yourself for the strength to keep going and the hope that you have. I really like this poem -- the top one about the shoes. For all of you who know and share my pain and most of whom I will never meet -- thank you so much for being there when people I do meet are not:
http://vincenzobenedetto.blogspot.com/p/poems.html -
@Tidybee: I was just about to post the same poem!!!
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@HappyBluebird: I am sorry. It's so awful to be around pregnant women when you are hurting. Many hugs.
@ValentineMommy: @Tidybee: Thank you for sharing this. I don't typically think of myself as a particularly strong person but I have survived through it. I think of miscarriage as a club you hope you and others never have to join but, if you do, you are relieved to not be the only member.Thinking lots of thoughts for all you ladies on this day.
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@ValentineMommy: Hope the school trip was fun, glad you get in some extra snuggles today!
to you as well!@Tidybee: Thank you for the link! I liked the What Makes a Mother poem
to you today! And thank you for being there with advice and support for everyone else!@simplyfelicity: Thank you, hugs to you today as well. I wish none of us were in this club but you are right that it is relieving to know that others understand and are there as support.
To everyone on this board, lots of love and thoughts for all of you, especially today. And all the best luck in the very near future.
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Changed my profile pic to this...closest I have ever come to announcing my losses.
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@simplyfelicity: Forgetting I wasn't in facebook, I instinctively went to click "like"
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@simplyfelicity: I haven't announced our loss but this is a good picture to put on facebook.
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Speaking of posting on Facebook, I was thinking about posting something like an article about the day or a poem or something. If I do I'm not going to openly say that this has happened to DH and myself but people would probably make assumptions. Posting would open the door for people to ask me about our m/c. I'm not against talking about it with people if it comes up.
Mostly I want to do it so that in the future if this were to happen to any of my family or friends they would know I understood and could talk to me if they needed to. It was extremely beneficial to me to talk to people who knew how I was feeling and told me it was ok to feel all of the ways I was feeling. Of course, I didn't find out any of those people were in the same situation until afterwards because its not something people talk about openly.
I hardly ever post on facebook and usually I'm in the camp of thinking people really overshare on it but part of me feels like this is really the only way to "announce" it without coming out and saying it in person (which to me feels extremely awkward and would make people feel uncomfortable).
Trying to weigh out the pros and cons before doing it. Anyone ever put anything on social media about your loss and regret it later? Or feel like it was a good choice?
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@HappyBluebird: Are you me? I've been feeling the same way.
A friend who live blogged her IVF experience (it didn't work out for them) posted this last week. I'm tempted to share it, but then don't know if I want to deal with the questions from EVERYONE. close friends and family, sure. But there are people I honestly don't care that much about that I'd hate to invite to share with me.
http://stillstandingmag.com/2014/10/10-ways-honor-friends-child-died-october/
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@HappyBluebird: I really admire and respect your willingness to share and be approached...and be private about it all at the same time. I have not shared at all on FB...but most of my friends IRL know and I am pretty open about it, even if it still hurts. I'm considering putting a picture of my (or a) candle on FB today.
@simplyfelicity: That's a lovely picture!
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@MaryM: Well I'm pretty sure we both like to crochet too, maybe we're long lost relatives
But in seriousness, I feel like that too, that I'm definitely ok with talking about it with family and close friends but maybe not the prying from the distant friends on facebook. I don't have alot of friends on facebook so a little weeding out might help me with that. It's definitely a con that I've thought about@FliegepilzHut: Thats really nice of you to say, thanks! Good to know that you don't regret telling your IRL friends. I expect that at times it will still hurt but I feel ok with that.
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@HappyBluebird: Did you also say you're a libra? Because so am I!
I think I'm moving toward posting right before I leave work. That way it will rest there for a while and I won't have to react immediately if people do post.
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@MaryM: Yes I am a libra!!
I think that sounds like a smart idea. I may do the same.
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@MaryM: That's a great article!
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@FliegepilzHut: I thought so too! It said all the things I'd wished I could have read when I was in the midst of everything. I also like the one in the sidebar that was posted this week on "the people you'll meet"
The pull quote made me think of you guys.
"You're going to meet a lot of different people along your grief journey. Some helpful. some hurtful. The best are those who quietly come along side you and ay "I'll be right here with you, for as long as you need me."
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@MaryM: I read that one too...only I'm pretty sure I've either been (or would've easily forgiven) most of those people, at one point or another along this journey.
It's so hard for folks to know how not to step in it...
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@FliegepilzHut: I agree. I don't fault people who are rude because clearly, they're ignorant of what they're doing (fine, I might hate them in the moment, but in the big picture I want to say "Bless their heart" and realize they don't know what they're doing!).
I think it's very true how they say the "ones who get it" have probably experienced grief themselves.
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@MaryM: That's definitely been the case in my experience!
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Alright, I posted the article. With a simple "Thank you [friendsname] for sharing this
" comment.
I figure those who care will get it and might say something. Those that I don't care to hear from...will they even notice or assume it means that I've experienced it personally?
I did notice one of my cousins posted a couple of memes. She's the type to post a billion memes a day (prayers and positive thoughts and what not) so I don't usually pay attention, but I'm glad I did.
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@MaryM: I posted too and like I expected a good amount of people assumed it applied to me. I'm happy I did though. After I posted and got home a huge rainbow was outside so I took that as a good sign.
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@HappyBluebird:
And hugs that today is so hard...I am putting off going to get my two candles. 
Can't wait to get out of here!
But in seriousness, I feel like that too, that I'm definitely ok with talking about it with family and close friends but maybe not the prying from the distant friends on facebook. I don't have alot of friends on facebook so a little weeding out might help me with that. It's definitely a con that I've thought about
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