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TTC after loss

  1. mrsmacandcheese

    blogger / clementine / 984 posts

    Lots of love today.

  2. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    Date of loss: No HB on our second u/s at 7 weeks (5/11); will take misoprostol some time next week.

    How long are you waiting to TTC again: Hopefully asap

    Any kids: DD will be 4 in August

    How are you feeling? I go from being shocked and not surprised.

  3. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @marley: I'm so sorry. Do you have a follow up scan booked? I don't know your story snd certainly don't want to give false hope. My 7 week scan was an empty gestational sac and I left with no hope. My scan two weeks later showed a 9 week fetus. I hope you are having another scan. Did they see the fetal pole? I have had experience with misoprostol. If you do have to go that route there is a thread here with a bunch of our experiences. So much love to you.

  4. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    @delight: I'm getting a sonogram today at the hospital. My OB is concerned because my hcg level is over 160,000! She wants to see if there's anything thing else is wrong. Should I wait two more weeks? Part of me wants to, and part of me wants to just get this over with and try again. We all know 2 weeks is like a lifetime.

  5. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @marley: honestly the two weeks of my waiting was flipping awful. I locked myself in my room and cried half of the time....not easy when you have a toddler. I thought for sure it was over because I had just gone through the same thing in October. I just went and read your December thread and you have a tilted uterus. I do too. At 9 weeks, right away they saw my baby. It is obvious my doctor just missed everything at 7 weeks, but I hear with a tilted uterus it is easy to do. Like I said, I hate giving false hope but I wouldn't rush into misoprostol. There are rules, in Ontario at least, about diagnosing a mc. The sac has to measure a certain size so make sure you have all the answers. I'm glad you have another scan today. Good luck. I know it is so hard.

  6. oskarsmommy

    kiwi / 563 posts

    @delight: I have question.. When you were going through that were you having your beta's done? Were they doubling? I know I cant change the past (and I am SOOO happy for you that you have a healthy growing baby!) but your story makes me think - I can't help but wonder if I would have waited 2 weeks would my mc have ended differently.. I KNOW odds are no, but I would say I still think about this weekly. I did have my beta's done, and at 7 weeks they didn't increase at all, in fact they dropped a tiny amount over 4 days..

    A MC is definitely trauma.. It's like my brain is stuck in that time, and I replay it over and over (not daily, but I have my moments) like I am trying to fix it so I can move on.. Only I can't fix it..

  7. Tanjowen

    nectarine / 2423 posts

    I'm so frustrated today. I wound up in the ER 2 weeks ago with what was eventually diagnosed as very painful ruptured ovarian cyst. I am now over a week late on my period and the doctor says they won't do anything until I miss 2 periods in a row and just make sure to keep track. I keep reading medical journals online (I know, I know...stay off the internet) about how I could have other cysts forming and it can prevent pregnancy. I also am tired of feeling like crap going on 2 weeks now.

    Just want to vent. Thanks for listening.

  8. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @oskarsmommy: I had my betas done only at 17&21 DPO and they were doubling. After my 7 week scan the doctor didn't order any more, he just took a "wait and see" approach. I know it's hard not to go back and relive the past. Heavens know I do it all the time. However, if your betas had decreased at 7 weeks then the doctor likely made the right call. Hang in there. You will have your rainbow. I do know what it's like to replay things In your head and question everything. I can't get over my 22 week loss which was followed up by a 10 week loss. I am 15 weeks now and am so happy but am scared every day. Good luck to you.

  9. Coffee-lover

    apricot / 340 posts

    @marley: Aww, so sorry to hear this! Hugs

  10. Coffee-lover

    apricot / 340 posts

    Hi Everyone,

    Date of loss: I started bleeding 5/1 at 6 weeks. I passed everything on my own. The dr confirmed through blood work and ultrasound a couple different times last week.

    How long are you waiting to TTC again: I am trying as we speak. My OB told me to go home, drink wine, and try again in 10 days. MY OPK's are positive and we have been trying the last couple days.

    Any kids: My daughter is almost 1.

    How are you feeling? I am starting to feel better. I had a bad feeling about that pregnancy from the beginning. I am glad to have a fresh start.

  11. Shantuck

    persimmon / 1268 posts

    Sorry to see all the newcomers here but hopefully you will just be passing by quickly.

    @Tanjowen: Sorry to hear about your cyst and ER visit. How scary! It's so frustrating to just want to get on with it already and not have your body cooperate.

  12. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    False alarm. Tech saw a heartbeat at the second scan. I'm so mad at my doctor! Thank you everyone for the last 24 hours and good luck to you!!

  13. catlady

    grapefruit / 4951 posts

    @marley: That is amazing news! So glad for you!

  14. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @marley: AHHHHHH Awesome! See? Anything can happen. I've learned that even doctors make mistakes So happy for you. Best wishes for the rest of the pregnancy.

  15. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @Coffee-lover: SO sorry for your loss. I'm glad that you got the go ahead to try right away, and that you are feeling up to it. Best wishes this cycle!

    @Tanjowen: I'm sorry you are feeling so crappy. I have never had a cyst, but I have heard from friends how painful they are. I hope your body heals quickly.

  16. Shantuck

    persimmon / 1268 posts

    @marley: Yay! I'm so happy for you!

  17. winniebee

    hostess / wonderful grape / 20749 posts

    @marley: amazing!!!

  18. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    @catlady: @delight: @Shantuck: @winniebee: amazing and horrifying!

  19. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @marley: I really hope no one wild have let you take the miso before a follow up! If you had someone pushing for it, I'd put up a fuss! So happy for you though!

  20. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    @delight: she wanted me to take it today or tomorrow so I could have the weekend to deal with the pain etc. I said I wanted to do it next week and she was not happy about it.

  21. Mrs. Champagne

    GOLD / honeydew / 7956 posts

    @marley: omg. That's amazing news! But crazy they pushed for you to take miso already! When I had my mmc I measured 6 weeks (should have been 9) and they still made me wait a week to be sure and do three blood draws to be extra sure!

  22. winniebee

    hostess / wonderful grape / 20749 posts

    @marley: that's terrifying. Is this your OB? I would absolutely call tomorrow and relate what happen and relate your horror that she wanted you to take the drug so soon.

  23. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    @Mrs. Champagne: @winniebee: Thanks! Yes, it's my OB, and my husband called and left an angry message. We still can't believe she was pushing the misoprostol before getting a second scan. She was annoyed that I didn't want to take it tomorrow. I'm looking for a new OB now. I don't think I can even speak to her again.

  24. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @marley: honestly the more I think about it the more I feel it is malpractice. You should look into the guidelines for diagnosing a miscarriage. 7 weeks is really early and I know there are guidelines but I'm sure different hospitals follow different rules. Where I am, you have to have more than one scan at least a week apart. If it is an empty sac it has to be more than 25mm and if there is a pole it has has to be more than 7mm without a HB to say it is for sure over. Sounds like your OB really jumped the gun and I would be worried she would do this with other patients. I am so glad you didn't listen to her and are finding someone new.

  25. winniebee

    hostess / wonderful grape / 20749 posts

    @delight: agree

  26. catlady

    grapefruit / 4951 posts

    @marley: I agree with @delight. It's terrifying to me that you might have been pushed to abort a healthy baby. My miscarriages were super obvious, but for my first one (should have been 10 weeks, measured only 6 with no heartbeat), they still asked if I wanted to wait a week and be re-scanned before taking miso. I was the one who pushed to take it sooner (because there was no way I would have been able to get a bfp when I did if I was only 6 weeks along) but they were happy to have me wait.

  27. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    @delight: @winniebee: @catlady: I couldn't find anything conclusive regarding guidelines in the US. I think they vary by practice? But whatever it is, I still can't believe she didn't order a followup scan. She called this morning and I couldn't bring myself to pick up. I was hoping she's just leave a message about the scans but she just said she'll call me later. Ugh.

  28. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @marley: I think it is just bugging me because I feel like she would have diagnosed my current pregnancy as a miscarriage with my 7 week totally empty sac. I know it'll be hard to talk to her on the phone, can your DH answer and just let her know your concerns? She was completely wrong in not ordering a follow up scan. At any rate, I'm sure you just want to forget about this and enjoy your pregnancy. i I hope you are able to just breath a sigh of relief knowing baby is ok! I'm glad we are having this discussion though because maybe someone will find this thread on their google searches and not be so quick to do medical management in early pregnancy.

  29. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    @delight: absolutely! I was almost resigned to taking the miso when I found the misdiagnosed miscarriages site. Reading all those stories really helped. I'm probably going to submit my story on there to help other ladies in despair.

  30. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @marley: I was thinking of submitting mine too but I am not sure if she still accepts new stories. It was a great resource for me too. I read through them all. Every day. For two weeks. Haha. It got me through my waiting period.

  31. Shantuck

    persimmon / 1268 posts

    I agree with @delight. There are certain guidelines that they need to follow in order to make that diagnosis. I had a blighted ovum in December and I basically had to wait and see and come back for another ultrasound, do more bloodwork, etc. until they could officially make the recommendation to do the D&C. It sucked to have the whole thing drag on but at least I could feel confident in the decision to move forward with the D&C. I'm so glad you went in for another scan!

  32. marley

    kiwi / 706 posts

    @Shantuck: so sorry you had to go through that.

  33. Coffee-lover

    apricot / 340 posts

    @marley: so glad it was a false alarm!

  34. Coffee-lover

    apricot / 340 posts

    @delight: I am so not feeling up to it, but I just have to push through. I really want another baby. The sooner we have another baby, the sooner I can quit my job and move out of state, so im kind of pusjing myself. I almost broke out in tears the first time I had sex with my husband, but I think pushing through it is making me feel better.

  35. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @Coffee-lover: ugh sorry mama. TTC after a loss is hard. I know after my losses I just wanted to desperately be pregnant again. I hope your stay on this board is short.

  36. Tanjowen

    nectarine / 2423 posts

    Ok, so my head is spinning now! I posted earlier that I went to the ER 2 weeks ago for a CT scan, and then followed up with my OBGYN last week and she diagnosed a burst ovarian cyst. All pregnancy tests were negative.

    Skip to this week, and I missed my period. I called the nurse who told me that trauma can cause a body to skip a period and not to worry, but if I missed next month to call. Disheartening since it seemed a delay in becoming pregnant.

    I woke up this morning and just felt...off. My pants don't fit right, my breasts felt more full, and sure enough, I took a test and it's positive!!!! I'm not sure what to think and trying to be very cautious in my excitement as I had severe abdominal pain, light pink bleeding and am still having light cramping (what I thought was pre-menstrual cramps!). The hardest part will be the waiting to see if this our our sticky baby.

  37. delight

    pomelo / 5281 posts

    @Tanjowen: oh my! Sending many positive and sticky thoughts your way. Congratulations!

  38. catlady

    grapefruit / 4951 posts

    @Tanjowen: That is crazy! I hope this is it for you. Congrats!

  39. Shantuck

    persimmon / 1268 posts

    @Tanjowen: good luck!!!! I had cramps for weeks after my positive test and was constantly convinced it wasn't going to happen. After several weeks things calmed down.

    @Coffee-lover: We pushed through after our losses as well. I actually felt better knowing I was doing all I could to stay in track with our family plans. At 35, I didn't feel like I could delay.

  40. QBbride

    GOLD / nectarine / 2669 posts

    @marley: just reading this thread now and I can't believe your story! I would strongly encourage you to file a complaint with the regulatory body. For instance, in Canada, you could file a complaint with the College of Physicians and Surgeons. Imagine other women who have not second guessed your OB?! You were probably not the first person who was "diagnosed" early with a miscarriage. Horrifying! And congrats

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