DH and I are flying out of town to visit some relatives. We will be staying with them for the weekend. I have never done this before... should we bring something to thank them for their hospitality? DH said we could offer to order pizza or something for them one night. Is that Okay?
His cousin is expecting so we will bring a baby gift too. I just don't know if we should bring something, and what bring. It's difficult since we are flying and will only have carry on luggage.
wonderful pea / 17279 posts
they are probably not expecting anything at all. Springing for pizza is a great idea- one less meal for the hosts to have to plan or clean up!
As a guest with a car I have gone out and picked up breakfast from Panera.
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
For the gift, I would arrange to order something and have it delivered to your destination.
I think ordering and paying for the food is a nice idea, it's not expected, but welcome.
cantaloupe / 6131 posts
We stay with my ILs when we visit for the holidays. We typically pay for dinner out once or twice (depending on how long we stay) and I will cook dinner for the family and buy my own groceries for that unless they already have the ingredients I need. Its not expected, but I typically send a thank you card and a small gift after we return home - usually something I notice that needs replacing or something I think they need.
nectarine / 2262 posts
When we go to stay with someone (i.e. ILs or my family) we usually pick up dinner once or twice like @gingerbebe said. That being said, it costs a FORTUNE for us to fly to visit family (especially the inlaws - we're talking 2-3k) so they don't expect anything from us.
For your shower gift, I would ship it to your ILs house (buy directly from amazon or whatever) so you don't have to carry it.
grapefruit / 4545 posts
I think anything you do is nice, and probably not expected. You could also offer to help with anything she needs to do in preparation for the baby? Maybe pay attention to their favorite restaurants and send a gift card as a thank you after?
persimmon / 1111 posts
Are you going to visit them it using their place while coming to their city for another purpose? I'd say offering to buy dinner is great if you're visiting them. When people are using my house as a crash pad it is awesome if they bring wine or breakfast because they're normally not here for dinner.
persimmon / 1345 posts
If it's your inlaws, I think offering dinner or something like that is okay. If it's a distant relative (cousins, aunts, etc), bringing a small gift would be a nice thought. I went to visit my cousin in another state and we stayed at their place with our then 6 month old. We paid for a couple of meals as we did some touristy things and I brought a small throw for their new home.
clementine / 854 posts
Just to clarify, we aren't going for a shower or anything - I was thinking I would just pick up something small to acknowledge the fact she's having her first baby. Some onesie or something. In my family at least, we always get a small baby gift for someone if we will see them, even if there is no shower. So I want to do that. I'm talking like $10-15 because we have only met her once before. Nothing is expected.
We are staying with DH's aunt. His grandmother is visiting from another country so that's why we are going. I have never met her and DH had only met her a few times.
The food works well because while we are thanking his aunt for hosting we would be thanking his grandmother as well (I believe she will be making all her 'famous' foods) but then I worry if she's cooking a lot, pizza might not work.
I just want to be polite. I've never had to stay with relatives before and I want them to know we appreciate it.
clementine / 854 posts
@misolee: I wish I'd known about the trip sooner because I crochet as a hobby and could have made something like a throw. This trip was very last minute though!
Although it want to get his grandmother something too so yeah, that probably wouldn't have worked anyway.
clementine / 854 posts
@gingerbebe: I really like the idea of a thank you card. I will do that. I feel like people don't send them enough these days.
persimmon / 1367 posts
We host out of town guests all the time (both friends and family), and never expect a thank you gift. That being said, my favorite was the time that someone left a thank you note with a gift card to a local take out place that we had mentioned enjoying. It was great to have a "free dinner" on a night that we could just relax and chill at home without having to entertain anyone else!
clementine / 854 posts
@Rocker2014: thank you! This might be the best thing for us to do.. I'm sure at some point we'll have a chance to go out and pick something up. At the very least maybe a nice bottle of wine.
When I go to family or friends for dinner locally, I usually bring a bottle of wine, so I feel I need to do something when going for a whole weekend!
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