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We are two and through because I absolutely cannot go through fertility treatments again, and can't handle another potential loss

Mentally, I am checked out

Because I don't want to be pregnant again

Mine aren't here yet, but we've always planned on two because we liked the idea of having two kids and two adults. We feel comfortable with the financial burden of two later on (college tuition) and not more. We feel like we will still be able to live comfortably with two. Since TTC and discovering we couldn't get pregnant on our own, we are also done after these two (twins) for the reasons @Mrs. Jump Rope: mentioned too!

just because we don't want to spread ourselves any thinner.
both kids get tons of attention and love and I can manage 2 without feeling guilty.
i'm tired too. both kids are weaned, both are sttn.. life is good!

We're just on #1 but I think we'll be 2 and through. We like the idea of playing man to man defense. When you get to 3 you have to switch to a zone system and it seems like things get a lot more complicated haha.

We aren't completely sure at this point, but I think we are planning to stop at 2 because of the logistics...travel is harder with 5...we would need bigger cars, possibly a bigger house. If we really want to have another one after 2, we will consider it (because those reasons aren't enough if you feel like your family isn't complete) but I would also love to be a short term foster parent in the future, so I am open to having a smaller biological family so that we have room to take in little ones who need a short term place to be safe and loved.

@locavore_mama: From what I hear when you get to 3 it's mostly a matter of just blocking the exits so you don't lose anyone lol

I don't want to drive a minivan?

But seriously, being pregnant again doesn't sound appealing.

@chopsuey: haha I'm the oldest of 3 & I already feel bad for Chloe being the first!

@mrs. wagon: DH comes from a family of 5 kids and we agree that even numbers are better than odd. HAHA.

@mrs. wagon: good point about siblings. that is the only thing that occasionally makes me think I'd want more. All my aunts and uncles have 3 or 4 kids, and all of my cousin sets are super close to their siblings. Like bff with them. I like the big family dynamic when the kids are older… but getting them all into school seems rough haha. Also the pregnancy thing. Not fun. Don't want to spend the better part of a decade pregnant.

@mrs. wagon: Those are some good points! This is going to sound ridiculous and is slightly embarrassing to admit, but my younger cousin loves the show Good Luck Charlie and has gotten me to watch it with her and I like it, it is super cute - they have 5 kids spaced reasonably and make it look like so much fun! In reality that would never work for us and obviously TV idealizes things, but sometimes when she's watching it I'm like, "Aww, I want a whole bunch of kids!" Then I come back to reality.

I thought I wanted 3 (although DH would not agree) until trying for #2. further infertility and losses have just been too hard and I can't imagine doing it again for #3. if we had an oops baby, great! but financially it probably also makes sense to stick with 2.

We love the idea of a big family, but odds are finances will keep us at 2 and through. Although, LO #1 would be a good start.

@mrs. wagon: haha I'm definitely from more than 2- six kids in my family - and I don't want that many. I loved/love having a lot of siblings and family get togethers are very fun. However, I myself don't desire a large family. I think I could possibly want it IF we had endless amounts of money to support them, maybe have a PT nanny, etc.. But I am an anomaly - because most families I know who come from larger families, want the same thing. So I know what you're talking about.

We're not sure if we're one and done, two and through or open to more. We have absolutely zero idea what we want at this point. And I'm ok with that.

@mrs. wagon: I felt the exact same way as you after I had my first. I just knew that it wasn't the end for us, and there was a certainty there that there would absolutely be a second...

Now that we have our 2nd, I have similar thoughts about not wanting to make J a middle child. We are not 100% absolutely certain that we're done, but I feel like I'm mostly keeping that small percent chance open because my husband still isn't sure, and he is right that we are only 30... and we could change our minds once J is no longer a baby. Maybe I'll miss having a baby and want another.. who knows!

But right now, it feels like we're two and through. I feel like right now we have that perfect balance of having a full, rambunctious family, but our marriage is still thriving, we still have downtime for ourselves, and we can still focus on our careers. I feel like we'd be stretched so thin if we have another. It's just financially crazy to think about, I don't want to go through pregnancy/birth/breastfeeding again, and I also don't want to play zone defense!

Eta: DH thinks that we might change our minds once J gets bigger, but I have a feeling that the more we venture OUT of the babyhood stage and the spacing gets further apart, the LESS we'll want another. I don't want to start ALLL over again when both our kids are self-sufficient enough so that we can finally do stuff as a family (without timing things around naps, nursing schedules, etc) and ENJOY it.

@mrs. wagon: @chopsuey: @Mrs. Jump Rope: DH is the oldest of three, and that's why he's so open to having another! He liked it - but it could be because he's the only and oldest son!