I know that she does it specifically because it really, really winds me up. And I've tried acting like I don't care if she eats or not, but then she makes a huge drama, asking for something different (when she chose the first food in the first place) and loudly fake crying when I refuse (ive also tried making the other food, but that gets refused too) or hitting me.

Every meal time is a battle. She's never been a great eater but now every food is "yukky", "I don't like it", "it's got mud on" etc. Sometimes, she looks at the plate then launches into a horrible fake cry/wail. And I want to scream.

Now here's the interesting part - she eats (very limited foods) when I'm not there. After a ten minute battle about crumpets this morning, I stormed upstairs to change the baby and, in my absence (with DH supervising), she ate two bites. But DH is rarely here for meal times and, if I leave her alone with food, she tips it out, finger paints the walls with it, chews it up and spits it on the floor, anything to cause me to tell her off.

WHY DOES SHE WANT TO BE TOLD OFF SO MUCH???

It wasn't such a problem when I was working because she ate all of her meals in childcare settings 5 days a week. And she was a great eater at nursery. But now I'm on a long maternity leave and she only goes to nursery in the mornings, so all meals fall to me. I wouldn't mind, but if she doesn't eat she is a BEAST.

Any ideas?

Even cake is "yukky" to this child by the way. Even food she has helped to make - cakes, smoothies.... not a bite will pass her lips. She loves to help set the table, but then she won't eat. I've tried bribery, but she will not budge an inch.

Heeeeeelp!