4 month nursing strike / skipping 2 feeds (!)

By irene Jun 24, 2012

My LO is 4 month 23 days old, and he's been fighting us on feeding for about 2 weeks now but nothing like this weekend. Starting yesterday he cried when I tried to nurse him the regular times, and today, he basically skipped 2 meals!

Normally we would feed him 7:30a, 10:15a, 1:15p, 3:30p, and 6:30p. He would wake once at night around 3am to feed one more time. This morning when I nursed (and he fought), he basically took 1 oz at 7:30a, SKIPPED 10:15a (I tried to nurse him but he cried and fought hysterically), and he's now napping and I am about to wake him to try to feed him again for the 1:15p feed.

He look really normal in general but I am freaked out a bit. He plays and is active and all except when I tried to feed him then he would fight and cry. I am a bit worried about my supply because now I don't know if I should pump or if I should wait 15 mins and try again...etc. I didn't want to establish a habit of pumping and feeding bottles so I am trying to avoid that.

Has this happened to you all? What did you do?

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21 comments

BabyBoecksMom
GOLD / papaya / 10166 posts

Jun 24, 2012

If he's missing feedings, I would try to pump and give a bottle. That way, he's getting the food he needs and you're keeping up your supply. I wouldn't worry about if it becomes a habit since breastfed babies will almost always prefer the boob over bottle.

Do you think he might be teething? It can be painful to nurse if he has teeth coming in, and often they will prefer the bottle until they get over the hump.
lemondrop
bananas / 9118 posts

Jun 24, 2012

We've been going through that too, it is very upsetting- I feel for you!

We figured it is because of teething, he would nurse great early and late in the day, but in the middle it was hit or miss for about a really long, really bad week. We've been giving bottles of pumped milk from the beginning, so we did that when he refused to nurse. It sucked, my feelings were really hurt!

It never hurts to talk with your pediatrician though, just in case, as sometimes ear infections can be a cause. Mine said as long and he is happy with lots of wet diapers we were ok.
MegWag
persimmon / 1135 posts

Jun 24, 2012

Is there a reason you are on such a strict schedule? I just nurse on demand. I find that my baby lets me know when he's hungry. Honestly, if your baby seems active and is still having enough wet diapers, I'd try to relax. Maybe he's just adjusting his schedule now that he's older.
brownie
grapefruit / 4110 posts

Jun 24, 2012

I would pump for sure because then you are comfortable and maintaining your supply. I wouldn't feed it to him unless he says hes hungry. It may be time to extend your schedule. So you can try that as well. 2 feedings won't kill anyone. People know when they are hungry.

I would definitely also talk to the doctor because ear infections, teething, etc. may be the cause.
irene
nectarine / 2964 posts

Jun 24, 2012

To answer everyone, yes he is teething- we saw a white spot coming out at the pediatriatians last week when we went to check if he had a flu or something cuz of the eating habit change.

@BabyBoecksMom: We have a nanny that comes in during the weekdays and she gives him a bottle.... That's why I m not us if he is establishing a habit of preferring the bottle because bottles are so much easier - no sucking required....

@lemondrop: That s how I feel too today...! At 12:30p when I woke him up to feed (after eating only 1 oz at 7:15a and completely skipping 10:15a because we were out and can't give him a bottle) he drank fine at my breasts he even spit up. I was so happy I almost feel like I want to celebrate, then next thing you know when I fed him at 330p he took my weak side for 5 mins and cry bloody murder again. I decided to pump and his dad gave him a bottle he took 4 oz. I am so hurt. So does this really gonna go away in a week???

I am so concerned because our nanny is off half a week next week so if this is the beginning of a horrible week I'll have to ride through it on my own, not to mention I was hoping to work at home while juggling a baby.

@brownie: @MegWag: If I fed on demand, I think he'll only take two meals a day and wake up all night to eat. This guy doesn't cry when hungry. Today he basically didn't cry for food from the 1 oz at 7:30am ....and he still hasn't cried at 12:30 when I woke him from his nap. Our lactation consultant says its ok to feed him every 3-4 hours, it is just normal to be concerned when he goes 5+ hours without food, right?

The routine / schedule, it just keeps me sane and it is an easy way to work with our nanny. We can go out and run errands around his feed /nap schedule and it worked fine until now.
irene
nectarine / 2964 posts

Jun 24, 2012

What I want to know is is this nursingstrikethingreally gonna go away in a week or two? We are going to Australia in 2 weeks and if he behaves like that I don't know how to pump and feed on the plane for 15 hours ride......
brownie
grapefruit / 4110 posts

Jun 24, 2012

@irene: yes I wouldn't feed him extra (the bottle) unless he says he wants it. And it looks like your at less than 3 hours now so it may be time to try extending the times. He may not want food as often. I don't think you need to dump the schedule just look at changing it.

Do you know for sure he only took 1 oz? He is likely getting more efficient at nursing at this time.

If it were me, I wouldn't change the schedule or try feeding again until the next scheduled time. Or change the schedule (especially if you are waking to feed).
ohapostrophe
apricot / 464 posts

Jun 24, 2012

We went through a nursing strike and it was SO frustrating! It lasted a week and then we were back to normal. Hang in there
irene
nectarine / 2964 posts

Jun 24, 2012

@ohapostrophe: Thank you that's really reassuring.....

@ohapostrophe: @lemondrop: Did you both try to offer the breast, and if he doesn't take it, then give him a bottle and pump? I am really eager to know what do I need to do because I am very afraid I'll mess it up.
irene
nectarine / 2964 posts

Jun 24, 2012

@brownie: I read many resources and they all say that I should pump and give him a bottle during a nursing strike... and when I say nursing strike he literally doesn't take the boob, arches his back and cries.... and would gladly take a bottle. And my baby is almost 5 months ... so it won't be ok if he only eats 2 times a day....

I was so stressed just now that pumping didn't yield much milk - I pumped at 7:30 and got 2 oz (after he took a 5 oz bottle and not taking my boobs), and 8:30 and got 1 oz. It's like my letdown has broken because my breasts definitely has stuff in it...
ohapostrophe
apricot / 464 posts

Jun 24, 2012

@irene: Yes, I just kept offering, but didn't force the issue- you don't want to make it a negative experience. I pumped and my husband fed a bottle (which yes, killed me!).

There was a really helpful webinar on nursing strikes by an LC that I liked... the link is at the bottom: http://www.parentingstartshere.com/index.php/breastfeeding-chat-learn/
lemondrop
bananas / 9118 posts

Jun 24, 2012

@irene: Yes, exactly what @ohapostrophe: said- she is one of my breastfeeding heroes

I tried to keep it as relaxed as possible even though I was feeling so upset. I would offer both sides, if he arched his back and screamed (see, you aren't alone!) I would lay down with him skin to skin to see if he would relax. It only worked maybe 25% of the time. If it didn't work then I would pump and offer a bottle and call it good until he started looking hungry again

Hang in there!
lemondrop
bananas / 9118 posts

Jun 25, 2012

I just remembered one more thing that worked occasionally- if he refused to nurse I would give him a bottle for a couple of minutes, then make a quick switch to boob once he relaxed a little.
irene
nectarine / 2964 posts

Jun 25, 2012

@ohapostrophe: @lemondrop: I am a bit freaked out. I fed this morning (he took 1.5 oz from bottle and maybe 5-6 minutes from me) and pump afterwards got 1.5 oz after 20 minutes. Pumped again at 9:30am, yield 1 oz. (Which usually would have gotten at least 3-4 oz) Then i called the lactation consultant and went to buy more milk special blend, took 1 dose, at 11:30a I pumped 5.5 oz. Then now at 1:15pm I pumped again, yield almost nothing. (again usually yields 4-5)

Don't know if it is stress or what's the deal.... or if I really accidentally weaned myself....
LivsMama
pear / 1728 posts

Jun 25, 2012

@irene: I doubt you have weaned in just a week. A sudden refusal to nurse is a strike-not the baby weaning. I started a post when Liv was 4 months old and on a strike as well. I was terrified that it was all going to just be done, but out of nowhere one day, she took to it again. She also did it at 6 months. I pumped and gave her bottles after offering her the breast during the entire strike. Very important - dont try to FORCE the breast as it will create a negative association. Offer it, and once he pushes away and refuses, go to a bottle. I had her on infant nipples for the slowest flow (we use tommee tippee as their infant nipple is SUPER slow.) One of my friends suggested taking a bath with her and offering while in the tub with her laying on my stomach. That worked for the 4 month strike. At 6 months it didnt, but she just suddenly took back to it in about a week.

As for the lack of output while pumping, that could be due to stress preventing letdown. But my LC told me during strikes, pump as often as I would feed her.

Hang in there, hopefully it ends soon for you!
ohapostrophe
apricot / 464 posts

Jun 25, 2012

I was a champion pumper...except for the two times when I was stressed, rushed, and needed a certain amount for leaving my son. Those two times I got next to nothing- had always heard stress can block lactation but wouldn't have believed it until I saw it. There's no way that your supply really could have tanked that fast! Hang in there...keep pumping, keep offering, try snuggling skin to skin without directly offering the boob....it will pass!
irene
nectarine / 2964 posts

Jun 25, 2012

@LivsMama: @ohapostrophe: Thanks you guys.... I am now very hopeful that this will end in a week. And thank you so much for the tips. I would have so screwed it on my own (I used to really force him when he doesn't eat).

My friend also suggested taking a bath with him so I did tonight without drowning him (!). He likes it but when I tried to move my nipple next to his mouth he doesn't seem to know what to do with it. Then we laid in bed together for a bit for some skin to skin time, I tried to offer my breasts again he cried. Finally I gave up and did the normal bedtime routine, and surprisingly he latched on! Before the strike he's been a fast eater and would be done with his business within 10-15 minutes. Tonight he was dozing on and off for 40 minutes, and I slide him from 1 side to another and back. Usually I would wake him up if he fell asleep / not sucking but tonight I just let him, because I figured this is good skin-to-skin time / positive breastfeeding experience anyway. Then he finally let go and I put him to bed.

I am bracing for what's in store tomorrow.... but I'll try to take it positively. I'll keep you all posted when this phase ends...
lemondrop
bananas / 9118 posts

Jun 25, 2012

Yay, glad you had a good evening!

Keep thinking positive, they can sense when you are upset. Taking it day by day is all you can do, we're rooting for you guys!
irene
nectarine / 2964 posts

Jun 26, 2012

@lemondrop: Thanks

@lemondrop: @ohapostrophe: @LivsMama: Question for you guys - During the nursing strike, if your LO takes 1 side, and when you switch sides he cries and refuse to take it, would you pump the other side and try with a bottle, or would you just take it as he's done?

I'll be home with LO for the rest of the week (nanny's off). Just now I tried to feed him, he takes 1 side, basically fell asleep while sucking; but when I attempt to switch him to the other side, he starts crying. It is my weaker side that he took so I know he is probably still hungry. Nanny gave him a 2.5 oz bottle while I pump the other side, and he finished it like a champ. But when it is by myself, I don't know if I have the energy and time to accomplish that.... just curious what did you guys do.

I guess my question is, at what point do you know the strike is truly over, if he takes on one side occasionally?
LivsMama
pear / 1728 posts

Jun 27, 2012

@irene: I would wait on the pumping to see how he reacts if you dont top him off. If he is still hungry and refusing the other side, Id pump it while he is nursing so you can immediately offer it.

youll know the strike is TRULY over when he starts nursing totally normally again
irene
nectarine / 2964 posts

Jun 28, 2012

Yesterday he was completely normal again and I thought, Oh goody this is over! Then today he is acting a bit weird again.... I hope this is just a little fluctuation before returning to complete normal and everything will be normal again soon.....

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4 month nursing strike / skipping 2 feeds (!)

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