Hellobee Boards

I would move nursing up to before changing into pajamas. Then she'll wake up a bit while she's changed and you can do the preferred routine. If you're already having some supply struggles, I would really try to keep bedtime a nursing session rather than a bottle.

Is she in a sleep sack/swaddle/Merlin suit? I find the easiest way to interrupt the nursing to sleep link at bedtime is to nurse, then put in sleep sack or whatever, which should wake her up. Then sing a song, turn on white noise if you use it, and put in crib. I have done this with both my LOs paired with sleep training (Ferber) around the 4-4.5 month mark.

@littlejoy: There's a sleep regression happening in the 4th month. We just chose to ride it out and by month 6 she was sleeping longer stretches. Even now, I nurse and then move to the birth ball to bounce A to sleep (she's 14 months). So maybe do nurse then rock/bounce and see what that gets you?

@littlejoy: Yeah, that didn't work for either of my kids. Do you feed at every wake-up? Could you hold the bottle until after you are done nursing?

My solution was to throw a boob at the baby and neither kid slept through the night until 12-13 months. So obv. not what you are wanting to do.

Have you tried the paci again? It took a few months for my kids to even take one.

@littlejoy: If you want to try it, we used the Wubbanub paci's because the animal made it easier to keep the paci in her mouth.

I know how you feel regarding not waking your older daughter, I definitely give in a lot to avoid that (especially since our girls share a room), but just know that this phase will pass if nothing works out. Or maybe top up with formula if you are open to it.

@littlejoy: meant to say previously - we had this same problem with DS (he's now 3) during the 4 month sleep regression. I gave it two weeks, and when he clearly didn't improve, we sleep trained. We did Ferber with checks and the 7-10pm wakeups were gone within 3 days. If you are cool with sleep training Ferber is really, really helpful in training for simple sleep association problems which it seems like you have.

@littlejoy: I remember some pretty rough months in the first few (i.e., 6ish) months. I always laugh now thinking back at how I would pour myself a glass of wine and never even be able to take one sip of it! (I wasn't laughing at the time.) I specifically remember the 4th month being so tough. I thought it was just the Christmas holiday bustle that was throwing her off, though. And it was just what you are saying - I'd put her to sleep and she'd be up crying 40 minutes later. And multiple times through the night. I did nurse her each time she was up at night for several months. But at some point, I started to gently sleep train her when I thought that she was ready and she started sleeping through the night. And then I wasn't needing to get up and go to her during the night because she was able to soother herself to sleep. So even now, if she wakes up fussing, she can usually go back to sleep in under a minute. But on the rare occasion, I will still, at 15 months, get up to give her a bottle if she is crying hard in her crib for a bit. I think 4 months is a little too young to sleep train, but of course, each mom is going to have a different opinion on this. And you need to do what you think is best for your baby, and only you will know what is best for your baby. And of course, you need to take care of yourself, so you have to figure out what you can handle. Best of luck to you!!!! Its tough but it all really ends so quickly in the scheme of life. ETA - I second the suggestion to try wubbanubs. I keep three or four of them in my girl's crib. I think this helps immensely with her sleep situation. They are something to snuggle.

I completely understand where you are coming from. The one thing that really gets to me is not having any time in the evenings to myself. I need my kids to go to bed, preferably by 8, and I don’t want to spend hours working on it.

Unfortunately I think we are just hitting the 4 month sleep regression. That and DD learned to roll over so I had to swaddle wean. Suddenly it’s taking her longer to go to bed and to stay settled. I ordered some zipadee zips because I think having her hands covered will help.

I had great success breaking the nurse to sleep association with DD1 by waiting until after she nursed to put her sleep sack on. Then we let her cry with checks. The longest she cried without s check was 10 minutes and she only got there once or twice. After two nights she could put her self to sleep and she’s been a great sleeper ever since. She was 10 months old though. For me 4 months is a bit too young for my CIO method. I’m aiming for 6 months this time and just enduring a couple months of frustration until then.

If I were you I’d nurse, then put her in her sack, then take turns rocking, patting, sushing with DH until she falls asleep.

I have no idea if any of that is helpful or makes sense. I’m tired. Just, right there with you!