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Question: who know you are TTC? We went to brunch at a friend's house and people started asking if I was pregnant because we are the only couple without kids, and I told them no, then started talking about the possibility of open bar at a wedding I am attending next weekend to 'prove my point'. I feel like my friends will all just watch me like a hawk if they knew we were trying, and I don't want the attention. And I really don't want to mention my cp. But at the same time I feel bad lying. How do you ladies handle the 'you're next!' attention?
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@raspberries: yup fmu all three times. although i can usually feel which side i'm ovulating on and yesterday i definitely felt it on my right side and today i started feeling it on my left side. Do you think its possible that i released an egg from each side a day apart? would that explain the 2 LH surges or is that crazy?
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@Mrs. Microscope: a few people know. I told my BFF, my fav cousin, and SIL (because we're real close)
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@Mrs. Microscope: I told a good friend and I've alluded to the fact that we're trying to my parents and sister, but besides that no one knows. The last time my Mom was around we went on a brewery tour, so I'm sure I'm sure she does suspect I'm keeping anything. Sometimes it's a little fun keeping people guessing though. I'm pretty sure one of DH's good friends was convinced for a while that we were.
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@Honeygold89: @auggiefrog: my bff knows, but she is out of state. My local friends tend to obsess about these things and it makes me nervous. One friend struggled with IF for 2 years and literally every time we hung out the other girls would prod her about why she wasn't knocked up yet. I don't want that to be me...
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Count me as a cheerleader!
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@Mrs. Microscope: Yeah I know none of them will hound us. They're the same people I told when we started TTC DS
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I'd like to be a cheerleader too! I love stalking for BFPs!
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Cycle Day: CD 1
TTC Cycle #: 6
Ovulation and POAS dates: Ovulation should be around 11/9 or 11/10 and POAS will be 11/24 on CD 30 (i usually have 30 day cycles). Excited to see I have a POAS day buddy already. Nerve-wracking that it's Thanksgiving week though! Especially since we are hosting!
Baby #: 1
Your plan this month: charting/vaginal temping, BD at least EOD during FW..and lots the rest of the month too : ). pre-seed/conceive plus, prenatals/DHA, multivitamin for him, trying to get back into working out/start doing yoga for relaxation
Chart link: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/50c7e8
Fave cold weather drink: Hot Chocolate (with Bailey's until I get that BFP!) or Caramel Apple Cider from Starbucks@auggiefrog: good to see you here! I hear you, I always thought it would take a month or two. I got really down last cycle (beginning of #5) and this cycle is beginning of #6 and I'm feeling hopeful. Still frustrated at times, of course, but DH and I tend to deal with things by taking the time to talk it out/feel all the feelings/ and then buck up and move forward. That's not to say there aren't sad or frustrating days along the way, but since we talk about everything, we talk about it and then move on again. This is pretty much the same way we approach any tough thing. I hope that you and your DH are able to support each other because it really is hard!
@Mrs. Microscope: lots of people know! We get asked all the time about babies, too. My mom passed suddenly and unexpectedly (and way too young- 58!) last year, and that changed a lot for us. Every little bit of joy is really treasured now, and why not share it. Even moved up our TTC date by a year or two. We don't really care what people think about us sharing our TTC plans...we're happily married and ready for a baby and if they're asking, then they're going to find out! And when people ask for updates, I just smile and say "hopefully soon! We'll keep you posted!" and then people usually laugh and said "okay!"
I always thought it was weird before when people told me they were TTC, like "eek, what do i do with this information?" but now I realize it was more for them that they were saying anything. They were excited and wanted to share that...and honestly, why not, if that's something you want to share? I keep a fairly low profile about it at work, but my close work friends know and if people straight up ask (I work with a LOT of women, and some people ask some pretty blunt questions! I'll tell them we'd love to have a baby whenever it happens. Then I usually blush. I just don't go into a lot of detail because 1) why? and 2) there are lots of pregnant ladies at work, and it's pretty much protocol to not announce until at least 8 weeks or people talk about how ridic it was that you announced earlier, so TTC is similar. It's cool if people know, just play it cool and don't talk about it a lot.
Our parents also know, my brother does, and a couple of my aunts I'm close with, and my grandma (our only living grandparent between the two of us) and a few close friends. We had a funny moment last week where DH and his bro and I were running an errand at the grocery store together a couple nights before vacation. DBIL was going to be house sitting for us, so we were setting him up with groceries, and DH goes "honey, do you want some tests while we're here or did you mail order those this month?" and I turned beet red as his brother started to grin. Well, his bro knows now too! I laughed with him a minute later, but it just shocked me that he asked that in front of his bro. He was just trying to be helpful! DH also got excited and even told our next door neighbor, and now he and his wife are cheering us on...they're older than us, with kids in HS and college and are super sweet. We've lived next to them for a year, we like them a lot and they will be an awesome support when we do have a kid!
I totally understand why people don't want to share, it works for us, but everyone is different!
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No one knew when we were trying in the past but now that we are going through fertility treatments I have shared with all my close friends and family. I want support.
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@MissLace: I don't know if you can ovulate twice in one cycle but it doesn't sound completely crazy to me either, you know? Either way, you can be pretty sure you ovulated and maybe you'll end up with twins!
My temps are weird.. they went up Sat, and even more again Sun and then this morning a dip. So FF put Friday as O-date. But I started OPK's on Sat, and they were negative for two days and only gave me the smiley today. Then FF told me I used conflicting data and it couldn't tell me anything reliable! Ha! I'm thinking I should go with the OPK because I'm only now noticing fertile CM and I think my temps are so strange because we had the hour change over the weekend, DS hasn't been sleeping well so I wake several times a night and on Sun I was actually already on my feet when I realized I hadn't temped so I quickly went to lie down again! Obviously, I'm no good at charting!
Anyway, at least we got good timing so far! -
@auggiefrog: once I hit that six-month mark I felt pretty down too! I thought it would be easier TTC #2 but that's not the case for us yet! When I heard that close friends with a baby same age as DS got pregnant NTNP while I just had a third CP, it was really tough. So we took a break and now I'm actually hopeful again! Hang in there with me!!!
@Mrs. Microscope: some of my colleagues know, my mom, and a few good friends. Others probably assume it but I rarely get direct questions about it. Sometimes patients ask me how old DS is and when they hear he's almost 15 months they say "ooh, it's time for a second then!" but then I just smile and say "we'll see what happens". My BF and her husband are trying for their first and I'm so hoping we get to be pregnant together!!!
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@travellingbee: I hope you can convince your doc to continue with Clomid this month so that you don't feel like you're wasting time. It's great that you can move forward with concrete steps (either clomid or the iui)!
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POAS Dates TBD: mrsjyw
11/2: Honeygold89
11/3: Worrywart, auggiefrog
11/4: MissLace
11/5: SunnyFarmMama
11/7: abmamma
11/9: raspberries, Mrs. Microscope
11/10: Bluemasonjar
11/11: lil owl
11/13: mrsvdv
11/14: shortiecake
11/15: Jone0603
11/16: travellingbee
11/17: Mrs. J
11/18: NorthStar
11/24: MrsStar, EleanorRigbyCheerleaders: littleblessings, QBbride (thanks for cheering us on, ladies!)
@MissLace: That's totally possible. You probably have a better than average chance this month, if your BD was timed well!
@EleanorRigby: I'm basically of the same school of thought - I usually brush it off if someone is just being nosy (like, if we're at a child's birthday party and a random person says something, I'll just laugh and say, "Oh, someday.") But if I'm out for dinner and drinks with friends and they inquire, I'm more than happy to spill the beans. DH was so excited when we started actually trying, he pretty much wanted to tell everyone in the world, and I had to explain that it's not really socially acceptable to explain what OPKs are to the check-out girl, hahaha.
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So I'm a little lost:
I'm not temping this month as LO has a cold and is practically nonstop nursing at night... So I only use OPKs. I got one with two lines, one a bit lighter than the other on CD8 and one on CD9. I usually O around CD 13/14. In the last days I got only OPKs with one line. So, did I ovulate really early this month? Or not yet or not at all? Or is this cold (LO passed it on to me) messing everything up?@MissLace: One of my moms friends ended up with twins from ovulations 5 days apart. The OB/Gyn said that's rare with humans but common with cats... the babies could even have two fathers... I always thought that's weird and a bit disgusting, maybe that's why I remember...
@Mrs. Microscope: Last time we told no one except my parents. This time it's so much harder on me. Whenever someone asks if we're TTC or why LO has no sibling yet I just say: Of course we want another one, but it's not working! Usually that shuts them up pretty quickly. If not I go into details of LOs birth and how bad that was... I know I'm a bad person...
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Coming out of lurkdom and joining because I need support for this wack-O cycle.
Cycle Day: 13
TTC Cycle #: 4
Ovulation and POAS dates: I've been Oing CD 18 the past few months, but this month still has me at low (on CBF monitor) so I think this may be a late O cycle. I usually have some months that my cycles are longer by 5 days so I'm hoping this is one of those cycles.POAS date probably around November 15 or later... will update as monitor/opks change.
Baby #: 2
Your plan this month: CBFM, OPKs, just trying to enjoy fall activities, DS' upcoming birthday (2!), and the holidays!And just for fun... what's your favorite cold weather beverage: hot apple cider in the fall, cinnamon dolce latte during the holidays!
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@lil owl: I am right there with you!! I randomly decided to use a wondfo opk on CD7 and got similar lines...and one was even almost as dark as the control line... way too early to O right, esp when my usual O day is CD18+...
now my CB monitor has me at low for the past four days (when I had high days/two bars by now - I usually have them for a week and then two peak days).
anyway, I'm hoping that the earlier OPKs were just a fluke and that I'm actually Oing closer to my usual or even later!
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@lil owl: @mrsjyw: I'm jumping on the who-the-heck-knows-what's-going-on-with-O bandwagon. I was due to O yesterday, but I haven't gotten a positive OPK yet - I'm just hoping it's late and not an anovulatory cycle? Poor DH is getting worn out over here.
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@raspberries: @mrsjyw: @lil owl: It's frustrating when O is hard to see!
Are you ladies doing oral temps or vaginal temps? I found vaginal temps gave much clearer shifts (although the last couple months I was sick during FW which made it harder to tell, but there was still a shift!). Even though the shifts were a little rocky due to illness, I found a giant different with the oral temps when I did both for a month.
I use the clear blue digital OPK's that are not the advanced kind. They are the kind with either the smiley face or blank circle. I don't think I could use the non-digital kind because I think I'd get frustrated trying to interpret darkness. I buy mine on amazon for $33/20 pack, which is way better than any store price (at CVS it's $41 for a 7 pack!).
I've had a little trouble pinpointing O the last couple months because of being sick/OPK's not matching up with temps but hoping this month is more clear.
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@raspberries: this EOD thing is exhausting...we're taking a more relaxed approach this time around...EOD when we feel like it, but since I haven't gotten "high"s on my monitor yet, I'm not inclined to overdo it right now
@EleanorRigby: I've never temped before, but use the CB fertility monitor. Usually gives me a week or so of high fertility and then two peak (O) days. I haven't hit high yet and the past few months hit high by CD 11, today is CD 13. It might just be a hormonal thing and I won't know about a late O until well, it's late next week!
Just frustrating when I was getting used to a pattern.I looked at my cycles since the beginning of this year and mine have varied in length month to month from 29 days upwards to 36 days. And it's just been the past few months that I've been using the monitor/ttc that I've consistently "O"ed on CD 18. I'm going to keep everything crossed that I still O relatively close to that day and that it isn't an anovulatory cycle. I also did have a head cold last week so maybe that was a factor?
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@EleanorRigby: I use the same clear blue digital OPKs that you do - otherwise I'd be posting to HB every other day being like, "Is this positive? Okay, is it positive now?" Hahaha. I'm thinking about switching to advanced with the flashing smileys, though - I think I might do that when I run out of these ones.
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@mrsjyw: we tried for ED last cycle...whew! I think chilling it to EOD unless we REALLY want to one two days in a row will work out better for us! Esp since I'm still trying to figure out which day I O/if I actually for sure O!
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@EleanorRigby: we ED the cycle we got pregnant with DS (first time using the monitor) .. it was like 11 days straight because I had that many "high" days before my peak O day(s). These past few cycles we've been doing a loose SMEP plan. EOD from CD9 and then ED on peak O days. And even that's exhausting... I have no idea how we did it before!
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@EleanorRigby: Oh, and I'm actually not temping - I did for a while, but I got a little obsessive about it so we're just doing OPKs. I'm trying not to get all cray cray about TTC, but it can be a struggle!
@mrsjyw: Do you think the fertility monitor is worth it? I've had long/weird cycles since coming off of BC in January - varying from 35-45 days in legnth (although this is the first that OPKs haven't confirmed O yet.)
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@raspberries: when we were TTC DS, i was a total newbie and didn't know what i was doing AT all. I had longer cycles too (33-38 days then). and the first month we used it, i found out that i was a late ovulator (CD26) and got pregnant that cycle. I started using it again this time for #2 and found out that my O days have moved up! by a week! CD18~... I don't think they're any different than the CB opks you're using though. I just needed the extra comfort of knowing, since i was SO clueless...and def didn't want to use wondfo line tests, etc.
I bought the monitor on eBay used for $100? Included that month's worth of test sticks, so back then for me it was worth it.
So far I've spent $70 on two boxes of test sticks while ttc #2. (We had a CP cycle 2)
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@mrsjyw: That makes sense. I'll probably switch over to the clear blue advanced tests after I'm done with these ones (still hoping I won't actually have to buy more OPKs, but NOT buying them feels superstitiously wrong.) Maybe I'll check Ebay to see if there are any monitors on sale too... that's not too bad of a price, especially if you can turn around and sell it for the same thing again after you're done.
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@mrsjyw: We're following a loose SMEP plan too. Uh, I cannot believe A is going to be TWO! (but that also means J is going to be one. waaaaaaaaah). But yes, EOD is exhausting with a child.
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@EleanorRigby: I temp orally, but have considered switching to vaginal.
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I just heard back from my nurse and they probably are not going to let me try clomid this cycle because my labs (HIV etc.) are not back yet and they aren't allowed to start before getting those in. ARGH.
ETA: If they don't get those in today, I won't bother POAS this month. I'll let ya know by tomorrow if I'm dropping off the list.
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I'm in!
Cycle Day: 19
TTC Cycle #: 7
Ovulation and POAS dates: O date I *think* is today-ish (10/27)... + OPK 2 days ago, no sustained temp shift yet. I won't POAS until 12DPO which is 11/8
Baby #: 1!
Your plan this month: We meant to BD EOD but got so nervous that we'd "miss" the right day, so have been ED for a good number of days and will continue until we see a temp shift. We'd go back to EOD but now that O date is either here or very close, we'll keep at it!And just for fun... what's your favorite cold weather beverage: Definitely local hot apple cider... with a cider donut of course
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POAS Dates
TBD: mrsjyw
11/2: Honeygold89
11/3: Worrywart, auggiefrog
11/4: MissLace
11/5: SunnyFarmMama
11/7: abmamma
11/8: YogiRunner
11/9: raspberries, Mrs. Microscope
11/10: Bluemasonjar
11/11: lil owl
11/13: mrsvdv
11/14: shortiecake
11/15: Jone0603
11/16: travellingbee
11/17: Mrs. J
11/18: NorthStar
11/24: MrsStar, EleanorRigbyCheerleaders: littleblessings, QBbride
@travellingbee: Hope you get the labs back ASAP!
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@travellingbee: How frustrating! FX for speedy results!
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@Mrs. J: I know. I mean, I will sign an affidavit saying I swear I don't have any VDs!!!
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@travellingbee: aargh, frustrating! I hope you get good news soon!
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@lil owl: @raspberries: @mrsvdv: @EleanorRigby: @auggiefrog: @Honeygold89: thanks for your stories! I think I am going to keep up my white lies to most for now. Its not their business and it stresses me out!
@travellingbee: so frustrating! Sorry!
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@Mrs. Microscope: Do what works for you and don't be ashamed of it or afraid to change it later if it no longer suits you!
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@travellingbee: aw that sucks I hope you get them.
I forgot what ttc and a house full of pregnancy test will do to you lol. I'm only 7dpo or atleast t think 7 and I already want to poas.
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Cycle Day: 11
TTC Cycle #: 6
Ovulation and POAS dates: ovulation tomorrow or wednesday and POAS on 11/12
Baby #: 1
Your plan this month: We don't really have a plan. We are just ready for our sticky baby -
@raspberries: I have a monitor that I am looking to sell. I'd be happy to make you a good deal.
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Hi ladies, I'll be cheering you on this month. Best wishes. After having an ectopic pregnancy, we are in the ~4 month wait to start trying again. I'll be joining again in January.
POAS Dates 
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