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Is it possible to start at 3 then progress to 5? If she's never been in a daycare setting and isn't overtly into playing with other kids then I'm afraid starting at 5 days might be too much for her? But then I can see your point about routine for her as well.

My LO is nearly 3.5 and just started preschool this year. We had the option of five mornings per week but chose to do two mornings per week and it's been perfect. She is similar to your daughter in she never attended childcare and hasn't spent a whole lot of time around kids. I thought five days a week was way, way too much for a just turned 3 yr old and I still stand by that decision. I may up her to three mornings per week in January but definitely not more than that. Kids spend so many years in school, why force it early, even if it is play based?

ETA: my LO thrives on routine and consistency as well but had zero trouble settling in to two mornings per week. She knows she goes on Tuesdays and Thursdays and that's it. I don't see how five days is any different to two or three days - they get used to what days they go and that's it.

My son turned 3 at the start of the school year and loves going twice a week. At this age it is not confusing for him, I don't think. What I honestly feel is that they will spend SO much time in school there is no need to push it or overdo it when they are so young. Especially if you are able to stay home, take advantage of it!

Eta I just saw you said Grandma is currently watching. I would include her in the decision. How lucky for them to be able to spend so much time together!

DS started a 3 day preschool program this past September at 2.75. (Previously a grandmacare baby). He loves it and while I think he would be fine going five half days too, this is the right mix for us and just enough where he isn't burnt out either. I'd say do the 3 days first then the 5 days the following year.

@Pirouette: It goes through phases. He's been there 14 months. He cried for a while in the beginning but then got better. Most recently, he's begun crying saying he wants to stay home with my mom. I think there was a new teacher at school that he didn't like. So we are trying to be really consistent and make him go every day. Previously, there were days I'd let him stay home because I knew my mom could watch him. Every other day wouldn't work now for that reason. He'd always want to stay home!

Eta: my mom watches my 18 month old. He'll then start at 2 when baby #3 arrives. And my mom will care for the baby.

@Pirouette: Yep, I work from home, so I handle pick up and drop offs... My mom watches him along with DS2 when I'm working.

@Pirouette: She's starting to play well with the other kids - she still mostly parallel plays, rather than playing interactively, but I'm not worried about it. She loves going to school though and is always really excited to go, but equally excited when I come pick her up. Our situation is a little bit different here though as kids start full time school when they're four (my DD will be 4 yrs 2 months old), so this should be her only year for preschool. I'm fighting it though and am trying to get her a delayed start (starting school at 5 yrs 2 months instead) so she can have another year in preschool, but that aside, even if she does have to go full time next year (argh, makes my blood boil just thinking of it), I'm still not doing more than three mornings a week this year as I think it is wholly unnecessary....

Judging from my 2.5 year old (who is in pre-school full-time, 5 days a week) - she does WAY BETTER when she has her daily routine. Weeks where there is a mid-week holiday or we keep her home for some reason, she gets really thrown off.

This is my opinion. My daughter just started kindergarten, and is gone 5 days a week for 7 hours a day, she did not attend preschool. I miss her. I miss her a lot.
Your DD will be in kindergarten soon enough (trust me it goes fast!), so if she doesn't have to do 5 days, I say don't.
My son is 4 in February and he'll start three days in the fall, because I know that soon enough he'll be gone for a long time. But, I'm shellfish!

I would do 5 days. Our LOs are the same age and my daughter is already in full day (well, 8:30ish to 4) daycare. After she turns 3, she will switch to the big kid "pre-school" class with the same hours. I think routine is good. What does grandma think? Will grandma still provide care in the afternoons? If so, I think it's a good compromise between getting socialization/interaction with other kids and grandma time.