DH's best man is getting married in a few weeks and we've received an invitation to a dinner the night before the wedding. We mentioned this dinner while out together the other day, I mistakenly called it a rehearsal dinner, and the fiancee she said she wasn't invited. Apparently his mom thinks the rehearsal dinner is a party just for the groom. AND THE BRIDE ISN'T INVITED.
Has anyone else heard of this? I'm scandalized.
GOLD / squash / 13464 posts
@oliviaoblivia: UMMMMM.... WHAT? What I can't believe is that the groom actually let this happen.
persimmon / 1479 posts
What the heck! Either the groom completely forgot to tell her or the MIL is crazy!
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
Oh jeez!! I have never heard of this! Poor bride!
pineapple / 12793 posts
I told DH to tell his friend to intervene, that it's totally inappropriate. They are going out together in a few minutes, hopefully he says something.
coconut / 8279 posts
I think it's weird that there were invitations involved, were they actually mailed invitations?
We didn't have a rehearsal dinner per se. My DH, FI at the time, had gone out to a hockey game with his best friend (we didn't have MOH/Best man), so I had a dinner with my family and bridesmaids and we went over the ceremony. There was nothing formal about it but it was a dinner the night before where we rehearsed what was going down the next day without DH/FI.
Maybe it's like that? Not so formal?
pineapple / 12793 posts
@rachiecakes: There were proper invitations and it's being held at a fairly expensive restaurant. I checked the restaurant's website and it looks like it'll be about $60 a person.
I know the wedding is really laid back, backyard, DIY, BBQ kind of event. This is crazy.
bananas / 9628 posts
Wow! That is insane! Has anyone mentioned it to the mother? Is she just an idiot or is she out right refusing to allow this poor girl to go??
My ILs hosted a party the day of our wedding that we weren't invited to and then showed up to our wedding 2 hours after they were supposed to be there. In laws are awesome!!
wonderful olive / 19353 posts
What in the world?! I've never heard of such a thing! I'm also baffled the groom is allowing this to happen.
blogger / honeydew / 7081 posts
That's HORRIBLE! Are you serious? Who does that? Does the MIL have a major problem with the bride?
That makes me sick even thinking about it. If I were her, I'd throw a wicked fit, because that's just not fair.
wonderful pomelo / 30692 posts
That's messed up. Even if it wasn't a rehearsal dinner - why would you ever have a dinner where you DIDN'T invite the significant other??? That's just wrong!
GOLD / wonderful olive / 19030 posts
Ummm...if that were me I would tell my DH that is not acceptable and it's either we go as a pair or not at all! What an evil woman!
hostess / papaya / 10540 posts
Wow......
What does the poor girl's future groom have to say about this?
pineapple / 12793 posts
This whole thing is just crazy. DH talked to his friend this morning and the friend thinks that because his mom is throwing it that she can invite whomever she wants.
You can bet that if I were in this situation DH wouldn't be going either.
I feel bad going knowing how shady the MIL is being to the bride. I don't want to have dinner with a woman who is so awful to her DIL.
pear / 1965 posts
Uhh thats still horrible. She may be paying for it but what message is that sending if she doesnt invite the BRIDE which is her soon to be Daughter in law. I can NOT believe the groom can justify this?
Like you said, if it were me in this situation, DH would not be going either. So sad.
wonderful pomelo / 30692 posts
If I were the bride, I would be PEEVED if my husband went to something like this without me! Even if his mother was the one throwing it! That is a TERRIBLE message to be sending!!! He needs to put his foot down and say "I'm not going to ANY events my fiancee and soon-to-be wife aren't invited to!"
apricot / 426 posts
Maybe the MIL is under the impression/assumption that the bride and groom do not spend the evening together the night before the wedding. Is it just the groom's people who are invited to this event? The groom should really have a conversation with his mom about this.
pomegranate / 3643 posts
Woah! Was the bride upset when she said she wasn't invited?
I just can't imagine. I mean, I can picture having a "groom's side" or "bride's side" family get together *after* at a bar or something. (My family did that but I didn't go - beauty sleep!) But no one was excluded!!
pineapple / 12053 posts
@oliviaoblivia: um, heck no! i would not want to go either! if that were my crazy MIL, DH would have said no way in hell. the event wouldn't have even happened if i weren't invited. that's insane and i totally agree that i'm scandalized too!
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