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There is nothing wrong for feeling this way! Money isn't necessarily the reasoning I sometimes question it, its more a question of whether or not it is worth all the effort we're going through.

@MrsTal: Not to mention the heartache! But recently I saw a quote that goes something like "you only regret the things you never try." And of course its what I've wanted my whole life...

You're not alone...we've already spent what probably amounts to a year of college tuition on fertility treatments. Or enough for us to enjoy life for quite a while. I don't know how much more money it will take, or how many more years I'll need to put my life on hold to devote to infertility while I watch my peers enjoy careers and motherhood.

These feelings got more intense for me after our IVF didn't work out, and then again when I learned about our loss. I know our child will most likely have special needs and sometimes I wonder if I'm going to regret giving up so much only to end up on an intensely difficult path.

oh i definitely did! i think it's a coping mechanism.

I have not but only because I had doubts prior to TTC about not wanting children. It wasn't until I got married that I wanted children. So once I got it in my head that I wanted children, I haven't been able to let it go. Plan B for us will be adoption so I know I will be a mother in a year.

I've had that and the thought of if I can go through this much longer. I didn't want children until I met my husband, I think not wanting children was easier than making it my life goal because I knew not having a period of my own, ever, would make it hard to get pregnant. But now I have a hard time imaging my life without a mini mash up of me and my hubby.

@MrsTal: Like many of the other ladies have said it is pretty normal to have this thought at some point during all the IF stuff. For me a failed cycle bring be right back to this spot each time...however I have always wanted children and neither DH or I is ready to give that up yet.

I guess I have never doubted I wanted children (at least at this stage in my life), but I do question whether just the chance of having them is worth all of this heartache and resources. I do think it is completely natural for IFers to question their resolve to have children since it is continually tested. Also, we just have had so much more time than most to think really hard about the subject!! Also, for me, I sometimes ask what if these infertility treatments don't work--will we be okay? I usually conclude that we will. Not the same as not wanting children, but, as an IFer, you are kinda forced to examine what a life without them will look like--something most people do not have to do.

@spaniellove: My husband and I have been married for almost 6 years now too. You raise valid points too. Hugs!

@raintreebee: Its a good time to cover your ears and say "LA LA LA"