Is anyone else following Ellyn Satter’s philosophy for meal time? How is it going? Do you follow it exactly or make some modifications?

Backstory: We started it when my oldest started to be a picky eater and mealtimes were a battle. Everyday was an epic meltdown of how many bites before dessert and it drove me nuts. For a year and a half now we’ve been doing Ellyn Satter and pretty much exactly as she recommends. So we don’t ask they he take a single bite of anything and we often serve dessert with the meal instead of at the end. He can have as much as he wants of the options on the table. Over time my son's picky eating has only gotten worse but mealtime at least is fairly pleasant. I’m fine with it as I do believe that trying more things will come with time and having positive feelings about mealtime is good for the whole family. But today my husband lost it and said he doesn’t want to do this approach anymore. He tried to get DS to finish a small helping of salad before he could have more chips and it was back to meltdowns, whining and crying - everything I want to avoid.

I feel like we need to get back on the same page regarding mealtime strategy and so I was wondering what other people’s experience with this approach are. And if you followed it to the rule or with your own adaptations.