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I didn't have a birth plan. I had told DH that I wanted to try to not have an epidural, but I ended up having one. When I asked for it, he made sure that is what I wanted.

When I first got checked into the hospital and the nurse was going over my medical history she also asked me questions for delivery such as skin to skin and a few other things.

I don't see the need to write things down when this is what they do every day and if there is something that you really feel strongly about you can just communicate it and make sure your SO knows.

@swedishfish: I was super mad! Especially because getting stitched up was so painful. But oh well, like you said the happy ending was the most important thing.

My OB gave me a really simple sheet to fill out as a birth plan. I barely had anything to put on it and wasn't sure I really needed a "plan." The paper stated they wouldn't do an episiotomy unless absolutely necessary, and the hospital policy was to do skin to skin immediately after.

I did end up writing down a few things, but in the end I don't think it was anything that would've been an issue. I think the biggest item to me was to not try to talk me out of pain meds. My OB thought our plan was good because it was pretty basic and flexible.

I think the good thing about a birth plan is that it gets you to think a little about what your preferences are.

@Danizaur: This is pretty much what I did. At the top I said something like "These are my birth preferences, assuming that my labor progresses normally" but made sure to note that my only real goal was to get baby and me through it safely, whatever that took.

The plan included things like wanting to have to ask for pain meds (as opposed to being offered every 5 minutes), how I wanted to labor (on a ball, walking, etc), that I wanted to tear naturally if possible, delayed cord clamping, have immediate skin to skin, breastfeed, and that it was important that D be the one to announce the gender.

I even printed out a copy and brought it to the hospital with me (with my practice I had no idea who would be delivering but it wasn't going to be my midwife), but a long early labor on almost no sleep and the really unexpected back labor had me waving D away when he tried to take out while I immediately asked for an epidural.

So I ended up with an immediate epidural (I was 5cm when I was admitted, and had been up for close to 24 hours--I just wanted to rest). I stayed in bed the whole time (I think I would have anyway, even when my epidural wore off I was most comfortable sitting up in bed, leaning over myself). I got a second degree tear on top of an episiotomy (which are not given standard at my hospital but he wasn't coming out and D thought it was best under the circumstances). He was sure to tell the OB that he wanted to announce the sex when I was pushing, and skin to skin and breastfeeding are encouraged already. No delayed cord clamping, and the babe was taken away from me for 3-4 minutes, but mostly because I was hemorrhaging pretty badly and needed immediate medical attention.

To be honest, though, even though I didn't end up using it and my birth ended up being very different from what I imagined I'm still glad I wrote it. I was really scared of labor and delivery, and sitting down and thinking about (and writing out) what my ideal L&D would look like really calmed a lot of my anxiety about it. Even though I know it might not happen at least being able to really think through the details of it made it easier to wrap my head around it all.

@lovehoneybee: This exactly.

I didn't have one. I was lucky enough to deliver in a large city, which meant that I had several options for OBGYN practices. I figured I picked a group I trusted and so I would just let them do their job. The only thing I knew I wanted was to avoid a c-section, if possible, and get an epidural.

I didn't have one and have absolutely no regrets. I figured a lot of it was out of my hands, and trusted the doctors and nurses.

Nope! The hospital where I gave birth at was already pro a lot of things I hoped for, and I told my OB I was open to an epi. Even when I got the epi, my nurse was super sweet and said they'll start me with a low dose so that I still have mobility, and if I needed to up it later, we would. The amount of epi I received was perfect, and my labor and delivery was awesome. Just wish my OB let me push longer than just 3 pushes before threatening to give me an episotomy so I pushed with all that I had that last push to make sure I got DS out and I wouldn't be cut open!