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Oh and for the record. I love my HR lady. She is not the enemy. She was actually my HR lady at my old job and just before I left for maternity leave got hired here! She is trying her best to be very supportive .... however I know deep down that she is not really on my side. My employer/my boss will win this, because it comes down to $$ mostly.
They could care less if I do what's best for my family, or if I really AM working super hard and being productive (of course not right now while I'm posting on HB). -
Sending good thoughts your way! Keep us posted!
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@cmomma17: UGH! How frustrating!!! It sucks that they are being so unsupportive about this. Your boss sucks. Is there anyway you can just not be paid for the time you pump? I know that that's probably an unpleasant option, but it might be less stressful. I know for me, I really can't come to work any earlier or leave any later because I have to nurse in the morning and when I get home. If I stayed longer, I'd just have to pump more, so that doesn't really help! Since you don't have vacation, maybe you can just not get paid for the time?
Also, do you have any paid breaks? We have two 15 minute paid breaks, so even though I take 30 minutes to pump each time, I count half of my pumping time as my break, and then the other half I use vacation. If you can use a break, then maybe you'd only have to be unpaid for 30-45 minutes or something.
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@cmomma17: what is your lunch break time? Can you deduct your pump time from that? I get an hr and took (2) 20 minute breaks to pump. So I just ate at my desk and took a 20 min lunch "break" when in reality I worked through it.
Can you work from home to make up the time? -
This makes me so mad
I'm so so sorry ... Do you work in customer service? Can we all send in complaints about your boss? Like how she spends to much time whining about employees feeding their children and not working?
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wow that sucks *hugs*
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@cmomma17: this is NOT okay. I work in HR and they have to work with you. Please don't hesitate to challenge them. I'm so upset for you. As if breastfeeding isn't hard enough. I'm so terribly sorry this is becoming an issue. I'm hoping they will find you a space close to your office. F them.
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And I don't think it's fair that you're being punished because the only room you can pump in is so far away. You should time how long it takes for you to walk there and back. Then maybe you can say "Well, I'm only pumping for 20 minutes! It's not my fault it takes 20 minutes to get to the room and back!" Hopefully they are able to find you a room closer, so maybe you would be using less time to pump.
For me, I'm limited to 30 minutes to pump, so even though I probably could pump a lot longer, I have to just deal with pumping for 20-25 minutes and make do. Luckily, that's enough time for me to get what I need (although I'm often guilty of going early to get an extra 5 minutes). Maybe you can get away with pumping for less time and still get a decent amount? I know that I get the most out in the first 10-15 minutes. The last 5-10 minutes is just a little extra.
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Also, knowledge is power. Look into what your rights are in your state. Don't assume they are giving you the right information.
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Also ... Some more practical solutions ... Can you pump the other side while you're nursing and keep supply up that way? I haven't tried it but I hear that actually produces more . Then maybe you could cut a session at work?
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You said campus, do you work at a college campus?
If so contact the office of diversity, where I used to work they were more likely to get stuff done than HR. There's no reason you should have to work longer because they can't give you a place to pump that is convenient. I agree with @Adira: on timing how long it takes to walk back and forth. -
I'm so mad for you! How long does it take you total to pump including walking time?
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this makes me so sad.
dumb people. i hope this gets resolved quickly.
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Oh wow!! That's just not right!!! I'm so, so sorry you have to deal with this crap!!
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Like others, I'm so angry on your behalf. I hope you can bring in a printout of the law to show them that you have every right to take time out for pump breaks, and they can't penalize you for that. This is ridiculous. It's already hard enough. Please keep us posted, and I hope you get what you want.
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I'm at a loss. I do work at a college. I don't think we have a diversity office though, what else might it be called.
I do not get paid rest breaks.
I do get an hour for lunch, but I'm currently going home and nursing LO during that time.
I pump for 20 minutes. I probably could cut back to 15 and see the same output I bet.
I have so little respect for my boss. Every day I've been back I have been here 15 minutes early and she has rolled in late. She takes long lunches, etc. Yet the time I spend to pump is being scrutinized.
DH suggested they deduct the time from my pay too. He's so mad. It's not like I have "extra" pay I don't need though, I'm not working for fun!
I think it's taking me roughly 32 minutes to pump from the time I walk out the door to the time I am back at my desk. I rush like CRAZY.
Working from home will not be an option in my field unfortunately.Sorry if I missed any questions or comments. My head is spinning and I'm just so .... defeated?
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One of the things that even makes me more mad about this situation is that your boss didn't even have the decency to talk to you about it before making it an HR issue. That's a really s!@#$%y boss, in my opinion.
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Should I ask HR to put what we discussed today into writing? HR bees? Lawyer bees? Would that be helpful?
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@MUI831: she's the shittiest boss ever
trust me.
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@cmomma17: I agree. And you should absolutely put this in writing. I would write it yourself and send it to HR that lists what your understanding of the meeting was. Always keep a record so that should you need it, you have documented proof. Good luck!
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@cmomma17: You should absolutely insist that it be listed in writing. There has to be some kind of law they are breaking with this. It is discriminatory. If they don't have a policy already in place they can't penalize you for breaking rules that don't exist.
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WHAT?!?! I am OUTRAGED for you. I have no legal advice but this seems SO unjust.
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I have no advice but this situation makes me livid! I would feel do defeated. I'm so so sorry. As if breastfeeding isn't hard enough...
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@cmomma17: I'm sooo sorry.
I gave up pumping at work because I had a boss like yours. She was constantly on my case and it got to the point where I got tired of dealing with her, so I stopped pumping.
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@cmomma17: Have you scheduled a follow-up meeting with HR? If you have, I would start a log of when you leave to pump, when you get to the room, how long you pump, when you get back, and also take in print-outs of the laws for your state (make a copy so you have it too).
I hate that this is happening to you.
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I'm sorry!!! This is so shitty! I am super pissed for you!!!
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This is really upsetting... I'm pissed off for you! I cannot wrap my head around another woman not supporting a working mom - whether or not she has children she should still be on your side.
I don't even know what to tell you! I would feel so defeated... And surely this is not going to let you respect her anymore, even after you're done breastfeeding... >:-(
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@cmomma17: this is insane! i can't believe they are WOMEN and are not supportive of the effort you're putting in to juggle both work and family well. you absolutely need to fight this! what about the women that came before you, how did they deal?? what part of the country are you in - do people mostly not breastfeed/pump at work or is this just isolated to your particular work environment? it's crazy to be that you work in education, with families, with parents, with our future generations... and they can't see past the 30-45 minutes a day you spend pumping!!
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@cmomma17 Yes, get everything in writing, including what the max amount of time you can take to pump each day. "Too much time" is hardly a good answer - you and I might think an hour is too much time while they are thinking 20 minutes is too much time. After you get that number, you need to tell them how long it takes for your to walk across campus, pump, and get back. Let your HR rep know that if you had a closer room, you could trim the time by X minutes. Offer suggestions on pumping locations, if you can think of any. Legally, they have to help you, whether they like it or not
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@cmomma17: It can't hurt to put it in writing. Sometimes, what I do so it's not super obvious, email the HR lady - "Just to confirm our conversation this afternoon. (insert what was discussed)." That way it's documented and if anything is inaccurate/incorrect/misunderstood, HR has a chance to correct it.
I'm sure there are smokers at work... How often do they get to take smoke breaks? Do they come in early/leave late for that? Do they use their vacation time for it?
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@cmomma17: just to offer another solution that I don't see here.
Can you redistribute your hour lunch to help with breaks? It would mean pumping three times a day instead of two+nursing but if they found you a closer spot that you could get three 20 min sessions in would that work? This is what I had to do because I could not stay away longer.
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@cmomma17: so sorry. your boss sounds like an a-hole. To be honest it sounds like you are being discriminated against. How would your HR lady take that claim?
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I did some quick research and many states do not have laws regarding workplace accommodation of breastfeeding. There is a federal law but there is no enforcement provision:
http://breastfeedinglaw.com/federal-law/. This site makes it sound like your only legal recourse is to wait to get fired and sue for back wages. I hope I'm wrong! Good luck!!! -
Dude! That pisses me off! I want to slap her ... pull her hair... something.... Not cool. What's her deal anyway?? Why's she such a B?
As far as your situation, do what you can. If they fire you over this, you have a lawsuit on your hands. Only taking two pump breaks for 32 min each is perfectly normal. They cannot force you to do that in any less time. I don't think it's legal for them to make you work extra time or doc your pay for it either.
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@T.H.O.U. that's a great idea - I wonder if that would work, @Cmomma17?
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I would definitely document the meeting somehow. Start keeping a log of everything. Try to do as much through email so there is a paper trail. This is ridiculous. How come you don't get paid breaks? No one else in your office takes a break? Ever? Your boss is a bitch. I can't believe she didn't come to you first before taking this to HR.
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@cmomma17: in work in HR and would definitely recommend having all of this in writing along with any email correspondence (if there is any) related to the issue.
This is horrible and I'm so mad for you. I'm so so sorry. Do ppl in your office take smoke breaks ?? I'm sure they do and I'm sure they spend a good bit of time doing so. I would argue that !
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@cmomma17: If you're showing up 15 min early then you're already working extra so what problem do they have. They're just trying to harass you. Most colleges have an office of diversity. I would type up your side fairly, documenting the time you arrive early and the amount of time it takes you to walk to an inconvenient location. At this point since she involved HR I would go above her head and give the information to her boss and some other office that can handle discrimination issues. Don't just handle this through HR because they won't do anything but you do need it documented in writing that you're trying to resolve this situation.
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@cmomma17: yes! Get everything in writing. Start documenting what time you get to work, etc. Ask HR for a follow up, take with you (in writing) what your understanding from the initial meeting was. I doubt they'd sign off on it, but can't hurt to ask. Also do ask about the smokers, same deal. They're wasting time when you're providing a life substance to your child.
I'm so upset for you. Your boss is a b. I really dislike her.
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@cmomma17: absolutely put it in writing! Email HR with your understanding of the meeting and ask them to confirm AND schedule a follow-up meeting to "create a plan". Time your pumping breaks in pieces: how long it takes to walk, how long it takes to set up, actual time to express milk, how long it takes to clean up, and walk back. See if you can trim up any parts of the process (I.e. use two sets of pumping parts, so they're completely assembled for use or clean with wipes/just rinse off & store with a cooler ice pack). Use this information to refute any misuse of time on your part and hopefully get a closer pumping space.
Also, in a follow up meeting you need to get a specific reason about why your pumping breaks are a problem. "Not fair" to others isn't a reason! How is it not fair? To whom is it not fair? What tasks are your coworkers taking on for you during your break? If you had the other room to pump in, is there work you could do while pumping (gah, this is not ideal, but a compromise piece). Exactly which parts of your job description does your boss think you are slacking on? Get it exactly and get it in writing (because I bet there aren't many to back up her complaint).
Secondly, get the amount of time that's "acceptable" to pump in writing! Ask for their feeling of time allowance *before* you tell them yours (if you can). If you've timed your current sessions, you'll have a good idea of your absolute minimum. See if you can get creative with breaks, etc. Insist on an official time limit in writing! Ask them how they want you to track breaks too. Sign in/out or email? This way they can't say you've gone "over".
If you want to exclusively breastfeed, don't let these shitty ass women take that away from you! It's so stressful, but really your boss is just bullying you and you don't have to roll over. Be respectful, open to compromise, and firm with your bottom line. Also, don't feel badly if you need to cut back on pumping (maybe to 1 session) & supplement with formula to keep your sanity.
Sorry this is so long, but I got resistance at my job (WAY less than this!) and I was furious. It makes me irate that your boss is attacking you this way. I've had bosses like that who bully and it's miserable. You've got to keep composed and document like crazy, especially if they want to dock wages or something when they don't have the right.
Good luck with this and come back to the Bee for support. What an awful way to end your maternity leave; I'm so so sorry
I'm so so sorry ... Do you work in customer service? Can we all send in complaints about your boss? Like how she spends to much time whining about employees feeding their children and not working?
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