Hellobee Boards

I think that it's sweet that you're concerned about this. I had a friend who I'd bonded with over issues getting pregnant and when we got our BFP, I made sure to pull her aside and tell her privately. I told her that I knew it wasn't easy watching friends get what you want because I'd been through that too, but that I wanted to let her know our news before we told anybody else. She was excited that I'd confided in her and has been really supportive.

Most people had no idea we were trying, so they didn't know how quickly we got our BFP. I also waited until we were out of the first tri to make our big announcement, so there was a long space before our pregnancy was known.

I would announce it normally, but be sensitive to not talk about ONLY your pregnancy when you're around them. I have several friends who talk only about their pregnancy, and while I'm happy for them, talking about it for a few minutes is great - but talking about it for an hour or more? That's when it gets to be too much.

The good news is, I'll think you'll find that your friends can be happy and excited for you even if they're having trouble!

@bluestriped bee: The only place I've talked about it is in a blog post. But it was in the context of "we are really blessed that we got pregnancy quickly, because many other suffer for a long time in silence and I know we are lucky".

I hope this wasn't sparked by my announcement this morning. I absolutely don't want to hurt anyone! I was just excited and have a hard time controlling myself in that state. If I was insensitive or made anyone upset I'm so, so sorry!

We got pregnant on our first try, and when we announced, we didn't make any reference to how long it took us. We never formally announced though, with FB statuses or emails, just word of mouth and talking to friends and family. You can never know the full extent of everyone's feelings on the topic, so a simple announcement is best IMO.

@Mrs. Blue: I had a co-worker that pulled me aside and told me she was pregnant before she announced it to everyone else at work. While it was sweet she wanted me to know before everyone, we didn't have our BFP at the time, so it just made me mad. I know I didn't react well, but I just another person announce they were pregnant. Both of these pregnancies just happened; they weren't trying or even knew if they wanted to be pregnant. It just hit me at the wrong time. We ended up getting pregnant a month after all of that, but then we ended up miscarrying at 20 wks and both of their pregnancies were fine, one even came a month early. Now, I think I'm in a better place if someone announced their pregnancy, but while others preferred someone pulling them aside, for me it was worse.

I have one close gf who has had two m/c in the last year and is still ttc... she was one of the first ppl I told (way before our public announcement). She said she appreciated it so much and honestly has been one of my number one supports before and since! She said that it made her feel good to be able to be there for me and enjoy this ride with me. She, overall, is such a postive person. While she vents when she needs to, she says that everyone's journey is different, and she LOVEs living vacariously through us as she "waits her turn."

I Tried for 20 months and have gone through many announcements since then.

I think telling those who are struggling that you are close to individually before the public announcement is the most thoughtful. A couple of my blogger friends gave me a heads-up and I really appreciated it.

It alleviates the shock of the public announcement while acknowledging that you care about those people and their struggle.