Hey everyone I've been away for a while. I started work full time again and its been busy. so DS who is now 4 months started daycare a few weeks ago and its been one thing after another, mind you this daycare isnt cheap. with some open communication we resolved some of the issues around diapering and his terrible bleeding rash resolved itself. (they finally started using the rash cream and wipes we provided)
the main thing that bothers me now is that when DH goes to pick him up sometimes he is in a swing (not in motion) with a bottle propped up. so he isnt being held by someone to be fed they just prop the bottle up with so he is basically feeding himself.
This makes me boiling mad!!! with DD her old daycare used to do this and it drove me nuts. it was even worse with DD because they would have the swing in motion and the bottle would keep swinging out of reach of her mouth. Seeing that really made my stomach churn. in our current situation DH does drop off and pickup but i have gone in a few times specifically to talk to them about things. DH spoke to them about it and they said it was because they were really busy at that time. I just am annoyed that its something they would even consider doing because I SPECIFICALLY asked them about that before deciding to go with this daycare and thats one of the reasons why I was willing to go with this place which is more expensive than some other places. both DD (4years old) and DS (4months old) are getting adjusted here now after being there for about 3 weeks but I am so tempted to just move them because I am so disappointed with this place.
One of the reasons i like this place is because they are a large center with multiple locations and when we move to our new construction home in the summer/fall we can easily move to the center near the new home without having to go searching for a new place
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I think it's illegal for daycares to that in my state. I'd request a meeting with the director and the infant teachers ASAP and let them have it. Check your state regulations too. Even if there's nothing against it, it's unsafe and unhealthy for babies.
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Being too busy is an excuse and unacceptable, in my mind. I'd definitely address it with the management.
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At that age yes Id be furious too. Its a major choking hazard!
I could understand once he had better control and could hold and remove the bottle from his mouth but not at 4m.
Plus you are paying them to feed him. Part of that includes holding him to actually feed him and interact with him.
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@ShootingStar: @MamaG: Thanks I just checked and my state has specific guidelines against it! I will definitely be speaking with them about it. Its just heartless that they would even need to be spoken to abou this. Thats the whole reason we are paying them is to at the very least just feed him and change his diaper a few times a day. he only eats 3 times a day there anyway
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@T.H.O.U.: Yes thats exactly how I feel too!
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Absolutely unacceptable! I would report them.
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@peaches1038: yes thats how i feel and the sad part is that when i googled it, it comes up with tons of hits so clearly this is a common thing that daycares do!! why even go work at a daycare if you dont want to spend 10 minutes to actually pick up a baby and feed them! so frustrating
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Absolutely unacceptable. I would let them know that you know that it is specifically prohibited. If they don't have time right, then, he can wait until they can pick him up to feed him. I bet his crying will make them find time...
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@JenGirl: Ha exactly! Her excuse made no sense to me. Like she was doing us a favor by feeding him that way
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Bottle propping is never okay. It would also make me concerned about other safety issues. I'm also not a fan of babies in swings or bouncers at daycare.
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That sucks! I feel like LO's daycare did this a little too to some degree, but my memory is hazy. I definitely remember seeing him struggle when they were teaching him to hold the bottle on his own. It forced me to make him practice doing it at home, so when he was there he had an easier time of it. Talk to the teachers again and make the director aware. Your little guy is too young for this IMO.
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Honestly, I think I would report this to CPS or whatever agency oversees daycare regulation in your state. Like someone else said, odds are good that they have other questionable practices happening, and it's a proven danger.
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I'm usually not a person to do something extreme but I would pull my children immediately. If this is what they do when parents come to get them...what else are they doing when they know they aren't being seen? In my state, swings and bouncers are completely illegal at daycares. They can only have pack n plays, cribs and high chairs.
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@Mrsbells: that is pretty outrageous. I have worked at 4 different daycares (I'm in Canada) and this has never been done at any of them and I don't think it ever would, regardless of whether or not they were "busy". I also agree with pp that it may mean other weird stuff is going on. Feeding a baby a bottle doesn't even take that long and it was a great activity to be able to snuggle and feed them.
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Thanks everyone. I am glad I am not the only one that feels very strongly about this. It sucks that I had to deal with this with both kids 4 years apart on two totally different states! Just our luck!
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@Mrsbells: I'd report them and move on to a new day care if you have other options. They're not all like that. Of course day care can't give anyone individual attention, but that sounds like a safety issue.
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I know in my previous state, bottle propping at all was against DHS guidelines, as others have mentioned. Also, swings/bouncers/etc were only supposed to be used for, I believe, 20 minutes at a time.
I would read your state's guidelines and absolutely talk to the director... and probably look for another daycare.
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NOPE. I'd be fuming. No excuses for violating any safety guidelines at a daycare, period. I'd not only have a very stern meeting with the director, I'd also try to pop in unannounced and if it ever happens again, report them. I'm so sorry.
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Good point @YogiRunner: makes. If you decide to stay with this daycare, start dropping in middle of the day, random off schedule times to get a better feel of what's going on. I try to do that on occasion with our daycare, which I love and trust.
I'm so sorry you have to deal with this.
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That. Is. Ridiculous. I work in a daycare, and I don't know what state you're in, but at that age my state mandates a 1 to 3 ratio. So in some bizarre world worst case scenario if there were literally no other adults there, and all three babies needed to be fed at the exact same time, and none of them held their own bottles, I could still put all three on boppies in front of me, hold two bottles and prop one and at least be within arm's reach and watching everyone!!
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Thanks everyone I really appreciate the concern and comments, in this state just like in my old state of NJ the ration is 1:4
Yes DH does stop by unannounced randomly and the daycare actually encourages it. We have spoken to them about it and I also spoke to other parents over the weekend who have been ther for 6+ years with multiple kids and they all love it there. We chose because it is a reputable chain center daycare AND also because it was the best around. We are hoping that after speaking with them and also putting it in writing that they should not be doing this because it is against state code that we wont see this happen again.
Considering how the other parents seem to love it there I am wondering if this was just a fluke or if they are treating my son differently because of his race -
@Mrsbells: I am so sorry you even have to question any of this.......honestly that would be enough for me to go!
What was the rash issue?! Were they not changing him enough...I am kind of sick for you!
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At that age, bottle propping is not allowed in our state. I would definitely have a talk with the director and bring it to light.
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@Mrsbells: ugh I really hope this was a fluke thing for your sake! As many others have said, bottle propping is not allowed in my state. Our ratio is 2:7 for infants but our director was always close at hand to pop in the room if things got crazy. I'm sorry you are going through this, I would not be happy.
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@Mrsbells: this morning I was filling out a new feeding form (monthly) for my 9 mos old. On the bottom there is a reminder the daycare does not prop bottles. I thought of you. Does your form state it too? May be worth pointing out.
oh no! I hope that is not the case. I looked out for different treatment too. I mean, you always wonder. Let's say you bring that up-your gut feeling as the cause- would be comfortable keeping him there?@MrsSRS: your state sounds great for infant care. Over the Summer I moved from a 1:4 state to a 1:6 state.
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@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: that's nuts!
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@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: yeah i really hope its not the case. they seem to really be getting to bond with DS and he is always happy there and is happy in the pictures they send throughout the day and i know it can be a challenge to get him to even smile for pictures but he always has a big grin.
My monthly form doesnt state that so I wrote it in this time!!
If they really were treating him differently I would have no hesitation to pull him out immediately
oh no! I hope that is not the case. I looked out for different treatment too. I mean, you always wonder. Let's say you bring that up-your gut feeling as the cause- would be comfortable keeping him there?
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