-
@littleveesmommy: her story definitely doesn't add up. How was the little boy handed off if your dad found him alone before grandma got in there? I'd still be upset that she a)allowed your child to go alone and b) didn't check up on her? Even if she was in the other room, no child should have been wandering alone.
-
Her story is very odd. If what she says is true, then why didn't she come to speak with your dad, or call him to her to explain your wet daughter? She should have offered some sort of explanation at least. I find it odd that she thinks it's normal for kids to be picked up with no interaction between the adults (ones who had been supervising and the ones doing the pick up)
-
@2PeasinaPod @torchwood @Mrs. J: This is where I am really confused. It just doesn't add up to me! I can't wait until I see my dad after work so I can try to get a better understanding of what happened.
-
@littleveesmommy: I know my LO is younger than yours, but does your daycare not have daily sheets about their day? Sometimes I have very little interaction with Xander's teacher when I'm picking him up, but she ALWAYS gives me his daily sheet, so there's always SOME interaction. And is the Director basically saying she saw your dad come in and collect your daughter and didn't bother saying anything to him in the 10 minutes it took him to dry her off??
-
@Ajsmommy: Exactly! Usually the teachers aid comes to say bye to my daughter when my dad or I pick her up so for my daughter to just run up to someone in recognition and just walk away??? And also the explaining of wet clothes. I am literally scratching my head now.
-
Did she say she saw your dad pick up your daughter?
-
@Adira: Yup she basically said that when the parent or guardian shows up, the kid is considered "picked up" and is no longer in their care.
-
@Adira: Ours is always electronic through the Tadpoles system, but I always physically see and talk to a teacher/caretaker at the beginning and end of every day when I hand off or pick up LO. It's their trigger to sign them out and send the Tadpole report to our smartphones.
-
I also want to add that this is the Interim Director. The previous director retired in January (looooved her and she always responded to me via phone right away the previous two times I had non-urgent calls about my daughter).
-
@littleveesmommy: I'm confused of how she got soaked from the water fountain... is she even old enough to be roaming to the the water fountain on her own? Where is the water fountain located? Why is she using it unsupervised?
-
@littleveesmommy: so fishy to me, this director seems to not see the vast concern that she didn't' even speak to the adult picking up a child. AND why was the boy in a separate room than the others, even if his "grandma was there" wouldn't he wait in the room with the other kids? I think she's full of BS and not being very responsible at all. I would start throwing out some harsh realities and say "you have strongly considered calling the state of this because your story is not adding up to what my father is recounting."
-
seems super sketchy... I don't think your child got that soaked from a water fountain. And why wasn't she more concerned about getting her changed or dried off? Weird... the whole thing is weird. I would credit what your dad says if he claims he didn't see anyone for 10 minutes he was there.
-
I am so sorry you're dealing with this.
Does daycare have a formal sign-in, sign-out policy? If not, I would request this starts immediately.
Also, if they do have it, I would request a copy from yesterday to see for yourself that the boy had been picked up before your LO. I think they are totally lying. Why would your dad make that up?
I would DEMAND that my child NEVER be alone. Ever. Like you mentioned, anything could have happened. And, with water? A bathroom with a door? And the other kiddo that was alone?
No matter how they handle it, I think reporting the incident is important. Maybe waiting until you talk with your dad to confirm those details.
Again, I am so so sorry. This must be really stressful.
-
@littlejoy: Yes to the formal sign in/sign out policy. I feel like this is a requirement for any day care. What if some random stranger that looked like a parent came in and just took your child? And that clearly could have easily been done since she sent your daughter to the bathroom by herself.
-
@littleveesmommy: I can see the director's side except that she should have been standing in the hall watching between the playroom and the restroom. (Multitasking to keep an eye on your DD and the other kids.)
No matter what, she should have called you when DD was missing (?) /picked up by your dad.
-
At this point it would depend on your dads recollection of the events. If there is any chance in his mind that her story is true i would be open to believing it. If not, find another center.
I dont really see why she would lie about being there though. That is a pretty bold move that could be easily proven wrong.
-
That still doesn't make sense! If the director was really there, why didn't she even come out to explain why your daughter is soaked? Either she wasn't really there, or she wasn't tracking the kids to make sure they leave with whoever is supposed to pick them up, or she didn't think it's a problem to send a kid out like that in this weather. You'd think they'd have a spare pair of clothes around, too... kids spill things all over themselves all the time!
-
The problem now is that you are the middleman (and the middleman always gets the confusing story). You are probably best to go with your dad to talk to the director.
-
even if the director's story IS correct, which i'm doubting, that's still not okay. she should have explained to your dad why she was wet and walking around alone. also, your dad said the other kid was in there alone yet the director said he was picked up first? i doubt your dad got those details wrong. idk. even if her story is right, i'd still be super mad and would have lost all trust i had in that center. i think it's time to make a change.
-
@littleveesmommy: I'll admit, I'm slightly confused by all the details so far, but something doesn't sound right here. You should definitely investigate more (perhaps even check with the grandmother of the other boy to see what her memory of that day was).
I have had, on many many many occasions, had people come into my classroom and not see me sitting with the children (or behind a shelf or whatever). However it sounds like your dad was saying there were NO other people in the room, including children?
In whatever case, I would get your dad's account written down & the director's version written down to compare them and talk with her again. Even if she WAS in the area and saw your dad, she should definitely have greeted him/said goodbye to your child. You could suggest that as building policy, in order to minimize "misunderstandings" (not that I'm convinced you are misunderstanding).
If you're not happy with her responses, I'd report to the state. Not supervising children properly (or signing in & out properly) is a major licensing violation.ETA: if you do switch centers (which I don't think is unreasonable), I would say not to just "let it go". If it were me, I'd want to get the bottom of the matter. Unsupervised children is just beyond unacceptable.
-
Did you asked your daughter why she was wet and what happened afterwards? I know 3 year-olds don't have the best sense of time, but they do have quite good memories. I would think she could accurately tell you why and how she got wet and maybe a little bit about the other circumstances, like where her teacher and friends were when Grandpa came to pick her up.
-
I'm sorry but her story doesn't add up. Does your daycare have cameras? I would ask to see the footage.
-
@Modern Daisy: Can I ask where you were able to look online at recent violations? Thanks!
-
Ladies you have been super helpful with all the responses - thanks so much! I agree with all of you that the stories just don't add up and if my conversation with dad doesn't clear things up, I might need to bring him in to speak with the director. Good suggestion by @plantains on asking for footage. I think they have security cameras and I will ask that if it comes to it. The daycare does have sign-in/sign-out sheets in each classroom and we have to write down the time of each interaction. No teacher was in my daughters classroom when my dad signed out yesterday though.
@adira: Her room doesn't do daily sheets but I know the younger room does. My daughter is in the 2.5-3.5 year old room and the younger room is 18 months - 2.5 years.
@honeybear: I asked my daughter, during bath time last night, where her teacher was. She said the teacher went home. I asked who else was there and she named the boy in her class. She said it was just her and *boy* left. I repeated "no teacher?" and she said "no teacher, just *boy* and me". Then when I asked how she got wet she skirted that question. That's about all I got out of her. Which, IF the director was telling the truth, she technically isn't my daughters teacher. Actually, you just reminded me - during my phone call with Director this morning, she said "you can ask her daughter and she will tell you I was with her". I will ask her tonight.
This whole situation is making my head spin. Up until this point I really liked her daycare and she was adjusting so well. I hate to uproot her. ARGH! [again, why is there no angry emoticon?!?!]
-
@littleveesmommy: so very scary and frustrating. Being at daycare where I know my child is safe where more than one adult (teacher) is present, is the main reason why we choose the daycare route over the in-home nanny. Stay on them until you get an answer.
-
forget everything else - did the director SEE your dad pick up your daughter? because if she didn't the fact that she didn't panic that a child was missing is beyond my level of comprehension. Because if your dad didn't see anyone, she may not have seen him. And yes I know, she can totally lie about seeing him, but before you simply ask, I would ask something like, "why wasn't I notified that my child was missing?" and if she says because she was picked up, I would DEFINITELY say something like, "how would you know, you were not in the bathroom or room when my father picked her up - there is NO WAY for you to validate that statement." unless she says, "i saw your father pick up the stroller" or offer concrete details like .. your father was wearing such and such clothing, or something to that nature, I would be ABSOLUTELY LIVID. this is assuming she was in fact in the room with the other children, which I might give her the benefit of the doubt. But not telling you or becoming alarmed at a missing child is just not acceptable.
-
@aegie: I didn't even think of all of this, but yes.
Be sure to update once you get more information. I think this has left many of us wishing we could be there to help you figure this out!!
-
Oh my goodness. Too much of this story is concerning and I would be looking for a different daycare immediately. Your daughter's response that the teacher went home, even if she isn't entirely sure, is enough to make me furious and concerned enough to pull her. If she even thinks there is no adult/teacher around with her and the other boy, that signals to me lack of supervision. The director sounds really shady and doesn't sound worried, accountable, or empathetic enough to be trustworthy. Sorry you are going through this.
-
I can not possibly see any good explanation to leaving 2 toddlers unattended. I help out at the church's childcare on family fun nights and I won't even let a 7 year old go to the water fountain without supervision. I always watch them from the hallway. I just don't want any trouble at all under my watch so I am extra careful.
-
@aegie: I agree with all of this, wholeheartedly.
-
Shady, shady, shady!!
Firstly, even if the director's story is true, what kind of adult doesn't confirm with the parent that the child is being picked up? Can any stranger just walk in the the kid is considered "signed out"?
I would definitely pull my child and start looking for alternate care. It sounds like they're more concerned about covering THEIR butts than the safety of the kids there. If you had contacts of any other parents, I would also discuss this with them to see if they've had similar experiences.
This is just unacceptable.
-
So I can't picture how your daycare was set up, but at the one I used to work at/my LO's former one, there would be one bathroom joining two rooms. At the end of the day, we would combine into one of the rooms.
So let's say a kid went to the bathroom, and at the same moment, their parent went into the now-empty room to the bathroom, it *might* appear they were left alone, even if the teacher had an eye on them from the other room.
BUT
1. If I had a kid who was soaking wet, I would have made a special point to explain and apologize to their parents. Or more likely I would have had them changing into dry clothes.
2. We had a sign out sheet in the room. Parents didn't have to use it, but the teachers marked it down. If I hadn't seen a kid get picked up, I would have freaked out
3. At my daycare, we just never ever ever left kids alone. The only exception was the bathroom, but it was situated so you could stand with one foot in it and one in the main classroom.
-
None of this is adding up to me. Even the director's explanation doesn't suffice - if we are even to believe it. It's not okay to send a 3 year old to the bathroom alone. It's not okay for an adult to pick up a child and not interact at all with the care provider, to the point that there could be a misunderstanding of who she was - giving her the benefit of the doubt that she was within sight of your dad.
Even if everything is saying is true (which, again, I doubt) it seems like there were too many kids for her to watch alone. I don't think it is normal to have ONE adult to a group of kids in a daycare setting. What if there was a medical emergency?
I'm sorry you are dealing with this. If I were you, I wouldn't deal with the he said / she said. I would pull my child out and report the daycare. But I know it has to be really hard if you don't have back-up childcare.
-
Hi ladies! Sorry for the late update but I spoke with my dad last night and he did recall seeing some kids playing in the play area but did not recall seeing an adult. He also said he was rushing to get my daughter home after attempting to line some paper towels between her and the wet clothes and getting her in her coat in the classroom. So maybe the director might have been there? I agree though that there should have been some interaction between the director and my dad during pickup, especially since my dad does not recognize the director so how would the director have known my dad was authorized to pick her up? Plus my daughter was soaked so she should have explained why she was soaked and directed my dad to where the spare set of clothes was stored in the classroom instead of just letting her go home in wet clothes. So even if assuming she was there, still so many things wrong with this situation.
At this point my daughter is still enrolled as finding new childcare in NYC is not that easy but I need to meet with the director this week to voice my concerns. I need to know how they are verifying that an authorized adult is doing the pick-up if the supervising adult is not my daughters teachers (who would recognize my dad) and what is the teacher to child ratio when they combine classes for late pick-ups. If the director was the only supervising adult and she couldn't step away to change my daughter out of her wet clothes, then how would she have been helpful had there been a real situation where her attention was needed? I miss the old director.
-
@littleveesmommy: WAIT A MINUTE!!! There were spare clothes in the classrom?? Your director knew your daughter was wet and she did not change her clothes knowing how cold it was outside? This is not okay either, hello if you can't handle the kids you have left then maybe don't' send your teacher home for what I'm assuming is for cost savings. And the fact your daughter said her and "boy" were left alone, makes me think they weren't being tended too as the younger kids in the other room.
-
@littleveesmommy: could you talk to the director's boss? Since the director is an interim director, their boss needs to know what is going on. The stories are not adding up.
- Google Plus
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Pinterest
- Favorite0
75 comments