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DH to do morning drop off... suggestions please!

  1. cake2017

    persimmon / 1082 posts

    @Anagram: This is great to read! I know he can do it! Thank you!

  2. PawPrints

    pomegranate / 3658 posts

    I've only skimmed the other comments so sorry if this is repeating things, but: I strongly feel you should not do a lot to prep for him. Let him handle this himself. He's not a child, and even if he were, it's good parenting to allow a kid to experience failure so they can learn and innovate on their own how to be successful and take responsibility for their own success. In other words, DON'T take it as your own job to do all the pre-packing and putting stuff in the car the night before. After he has done drop-off a few times, he'll figure out on his own that it's easier if he does prep the night before. If you both get into the habit of assuming that you're always going to do all the labor and prep to make parenting as easy as possible for him, then that's the rut you'll be in forever! Let him spread his parenting wings and fly.

    In our house, DH is responsible for dropoff of our older daughter, and will be responsible for both kids once DS starts daycare. I don't do anything to prep for him/them. He has figured out what needs to be done and he gets it done. If he doesn't, then he won't get to work on time. Yes, we've had a few failures here and there (like the time we completely missed out on parent-teacher conferences because he failed to notice the sign-up board) but it all works out, and I am so so happy we've set this precedent so in the next 20 years of parenting we'll have the assumption that we are both equally capable and responsible for all parenting duties.

  3. PawPrints

    pomegranate / 3658 posts

    Here's our routine:
    We do zero prep the night before.
    6am: I nurse DS while DH showers.
    6:15: DH wakes up DD, gets her cereal ready. DD eats cereal while DH cooks himself eggs and eats them. I put DS in his bouncer in the bathroom with me while I shower.
    6:30-6:45: DS still in his bouncer with me while I dry my hair and get dressed. DH gets DD dressed, brush teeth, does her hair.
    7:00: Everyone ready to go. DH gets in the car with DD and DS and drives them to daycare, I head to the bus stop to go to work.

  4. Mrs. Carrot

    blogger / nectarine / 2043 posts

    @PawPrints: I second this. We switched our schedule at the start of this year so that DH can do drop-off and I would do pickup, and I am really terrible about not over-engineering things, so I tried to really force myself to step out of his process and it's been working just fine. He gets up at the same time I do (about 2 hours before LO is up), so that he has time for a long shower the way he likes it. I leave at 6:30, LO is up around 7:30, and what happens in between and after that is up to him. The only thing I do is put out clothes for LO the night before because DH admits himself that he has no acumen for clothes selection and Lo doesn't care enough to do it herself yet, but otherwise they're on their own.

  5. Charm54

    cantaloupe / 6885 posts

    I do all the drop offs and pick ups. Its really helpful to me when DH loads all our stuff in the car before he goes to work. It’s also helpful that he does all of the dog stuff before he leaves so I just have to worry about the kids. I appreciate that on the rare occasions I can’t do the drop off or pick up he rearranges his schedule and makes it work.


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