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My LO is 2 and I do bring food for her when we go to other people's houses, unless I know what we are having and that she eats it. I feel like the host would feel bad if she wouldn't eat anything and was just hungry and cranky. Plus I don't want them to have to cater their meal to her.

At home, I do also tailor her meals. Like, she just doesn't like many meats, including deli meat. So I make her a grilled cheese and me a turkey and cheese melt. I love the idea of her just eating everything we do, but I think she's doing a pretty good job with the vegetables and everything so I'm ok with it. And she eats healthier than we do most of the time anyway.

Eta: I don't bring things that need to be cooked though- microwave at the most. Usually it's a couple pouches and something like cheese, so they can complement whatever the host serves that she does eat.

I would never bring my own food to someone else's house, and I would be super offended if someone else did that (unless there was an issue like allergies or sensory issues or something). LO usually gets like 3 or 4 different types of food and he can choose what to eat.

@Mamasig: @hilsy85: to add to that, what if they are serving something like salad? My LO just won't eat greens- I don't think she can chew them well enough. If I'm going to someone's house who has kids I might ask what they are making so I can prepare accordingly. But I'd rather just bring food than deal with her refusing everything and ruining everyone's meal.

But im totally the first to admit that maybe I cater to her too much still.

@Foodnerd81: I would find it weird if I went to someone's house for a meal and the whole meal was just a green salad! with nothing else on the table..

ETA if we're going somewhere for a meal, so will prob be there for 2+ hours, I generally bring snacks as well to keep him occupied until food is ready/after adults are done eating. So I do that, but I don't think pouches/crackers are the same as like bringing your own deli meat and bread, or packaged food to microwave.

@hilsy85: I should add in thinking mostly of DH's grandmother, who has a set fee meals she always makes for us, which we love but LO doesn't- baked fish (LO doesn't like fish), spare ribs... And often paired with salad. So I don't want to put her out telling her that C won't eat any of it.

I'll bring a bar or a pouch if we are eating elsewhere but nothing else, usually. And I don't offer options when we eat at home, other than plain yogurt as an alternative to dinner.

No, never, although LO is not that picky. We have really tried hard to introduce her to a wide variety of foods though, and we don't give her special options at home. My niece and nephew started getting picky as toddlers and now as young kids, they only eat like 3 things total. My MIL and BIL have to make special meals for them for every single meal, including holidays (the rest of us eat turkey, sides, and pie, and they eat hot dogs). I really don't want to have to deal with that.

I don't bring a whole meal, but I do bring food I know he will eat - pouches, string cheese, black beans in tupperware - and give those to him along with what our host serves.

More often than not, our hosts eat at completely different time than our schedule and I need to feed LO at his normal time anyways. A cranky hot mess of a toddler is no fun for anyone! He's not yet 2 though, so as he gets older I would hope to not have to do this.

I tend to have the same feelings about eating at someone else's house as @hilsy85:

That being said, we do offer some choices at dinner but it's mainly around things like, do you want watermelon or grapes on the side of the dinner that we're all eating so he's more apt to feel like he has some control and will actually eat. But it's always a choice where I'm happy with either one.

No, i would never do this. I have found that when we eat at others' homes, though, they tend to serve more toddler friendly food and cater to their kid's diet, so E happily eats treat food. I worry more when WE have guests, that their kids won't eat what I serve, so I do tend to 1) run the meal by mom and 2) serve something special for the kids 3) serve an all-family friendly option (like tacos). I don't really do choices at home b/c I just plate out what we're having and she can choose to eat what she wants from that plate.

Never. My LOs get what we are eating. The 3 year old has gotten somewhat picky but he will cooperate with his 3 required bites and he knows that if he wants something different, he needs to finish what he is served first, and he rarely does. That's all for dinner, though, we do ask what he wants to eat for breakfast and lunch.

I don't take food with us. She eats what we eat. If she doesn't want it, she doesn't eat. There is normally at least one thing she will eat so I don't worry about it.

I bring my son's food wherever we go, trust me, I wish I didn't have to. But my son had some issues chewing and what not...while we've resolved that, he is very untrusting of new foods and new foods in new environments.

Tell me, those of you that would be offended, do I have to disclose up front that my son has these food issues? The thing is, I don't want my son to be limited to where he is invited because of what he eats. If you knew that I'd bring his food, would you invite him/us?

I can't imagine bringing something to someone else's home since right now I don't plan to offer choices or only kid-friendly fare at my home. But, I will say one time I co-hosted a ladies lunch and one of the women brought her grand child. The baby was at least one and was a last minute +1 request. The grandma did not bring food and we had to scramble to figure out what was on the house that was kid friendly per the grandma's request when they walked in. I don't think I would be upset if someone brought their own food, but as a host I would be happy to review my menu and make sure everyone had something they would eat on the table.

I don't bring food with me, but I have the luxury of assuming DS will eat *something* being served, even if it may not be an ideal meal. For example we went to a bbq at a friend's house and DS decided he mostly wanted to eat chips and salsa but no hamburger/hot dog/chicken. I think he ate maybe half a hot dog. But normally wherever we can he can find something, usually something I'm eating.

If someone brought food over I wouldn't be offended, I'd assume their kid was being really picky. Or, if they're coming for dinner we're probably good friends and I already know that they have issues with food.

@looch: if I'm inviting you to my home, I would imagine that we are close enough that I know this fact about your child. If not, and my child had sensory issues/I was inviting a child with sensory issues, I would just say/expect to hear something like, "Lo has some sensory issues with food and can be pretty picky, so if it's ok with you I will just bring a little packed meal for him, so no need to worry about feeding him." As a host, I woudl immediately ask, "what are good/safe foods for him to eat, I can of course have those available!". I can't imagine a kid's eating issues making him less likely to be welcome at someone's house.

My LO is maybe a little smaller than most of yours (16 mo) so I don't know if that matters but I sort of do...? At home she doesn't get many options both because I want her to eat what I want her to eat and also because she doesn't talk yet. But for stuff like snacks I usually pull two options out and let her pick. But when we go to restaurants I always pack her food. We are still working on her eating "normal" type food (i.e. like prepared stuff with spices and mixed together). She is pretty good about eating elements of stuff but she doesn't like a lot of sauces, seasonings, or things that are all mixed up. Also she doesnt have her molars all in so she has a hard time chewing some things. We always give her food off of our plates at restaurants but she rarely eats much of it so it is just easier to pack her some plain meat and soft cooked veggies rather than rely on trying to order a kids meal and hope they have something soft enough (also she hates broccoli which is usually the cooked veg offered at restaurants). We haven't actually eaten dinner at someone else's house since she has been on solids but I would prob ask what they are having and see if it is adaptable. I think in most cases we could probably work with whatever they are having unless it is like a casserole or chili or something. But I probably would throw a pouch and some crackers in my bag just in case she doesn't eat anything to avoid a hangry meltdown. I pick my battles.

We always bring food for Xander, but he has food allergies and dairy is hidden in everything. I didn't realize I was supposed to tell people upfront about my bringing food for him...