Hellobee Boards

@banana: Gotcha

@banana: @Shimmer: I could seriously write a thesis on this, but it basically comes down to our belief that God created man and woman to fit beautifully and perfectly together, to become one flesh through marriage. Only the sperm from a man and an egg from a woman can create life.

I think it's a wonderful thing when 2 people (race, gender, whatever) come together and truly love one another. Who doesn't love love?

But anyway. I had a loooong day with my LO and haven't read through previous posts. It's really tough to write everything we believe out because it really is complex and multi-layered. We believe this because of this because of this..

@banana: Great job answering questions! I kinda jumped in late in the game.
But re: adoption! It's a beautiful thing and it's in the bible! Moses was adopted by pharoah's daughter! And God adopted all of us as his children! wOot.

I support gay marriage.... heck I have gay family members.
I'm christian, but don't necessarily agree with all the views of the church. I think you should be allowed to love who you chose to love (man or woman)

Also, is everyone who is opposed to gay marriage doing so because of religious beliefs? (seems so)

When I was struggling with how I felt about this (maybe in high school?), I used to say I supported civil unions but not marriage. But over the years, I have come to realize that I support gay marriage. Because it is an issue of syntax. I believe that two men or two women (or one of each) should be allowed to enter into a legal contract which affords them the legal benefits of marriage. I do not believe that churches (synagogues, etc) should be required to perform gay marriages if they do not want to. That ceremony? That is Holy Matrimony. It is completely separate from legal marriage. This is similar to the idea that I, as an agnostic former-Christian, cannot force a rabbi to perform my marriage. When speaking of the signing of the document that gives me marriage rights, I think that should be a totally secular legal transaction. If you want to enter into Holy Matrimony, go ahead. But that has NOTHING to do with legality.

whew... rambling. Hope it made sense!

Acting on homosexuality may be wrong according to my religious beliefs, but so are tattoos. My personal beliefs have NOTHING to do with what another adult does with their own body. I have gay/lesbian friends, just like I have tattooed friends, pagan friends, and professional gambler friends. I am ALL for them having the right to ink/pierce their bodies, gamble their own money, practice whatever religion they want, and have whatever monogamous relationship they want (I say monogamous, because I do get judgy when people cheat on SOs. Threesomes/open relationships, fine - I just don't wanna know.) So yeah, I'm all for gay marriage.

I also agree with a previous poster, though. If an officiant doesn't believe homosexuality is right, he or she should be free to refuse services. Heck, my parents' pastor wouldn't marry my husband and I because we lived together already - ticked me off, but I support his right to refuse us.

@volksgirl64: Oye, I despise when people use the beastiality/pedophilia example as to why gay marriage is wrong. We're not talking animals or children here - we're talking consenting adults. It's apples and oranges.

ETA: That wasn't directed at you, but people who use that as an excuse for their intolerance! Just clarifying

Polygamy? I'm not sure how that truly hurts other people either. I know it's not for me, but neither is a gay marriage! I'm content with my straight one

I really don't understand why it is such a big deal. Well, I do, I guess I just don't think it should be. How does 2 men or 2 women being granted the same legal rights as a man and a woman affect anyone else?

Who cares if it is against someone's beliefs? If you consider it a sin in the religious sense, then you should also know that we all sin, all sins are equal, and only God can judge us.

Also, homosexual unions have lower divorce rates, lower domestic violence rates and lower rates of child abuse/neglect. "They" are better at the institution that some are trying to prevent them from entering than "we" are. (Said generally speaking, as a woman married to a man.)

I saw this on facebook and things it sums my thoughts up well: If you have to make a law that hurts a number of people just to prove your morals or faith, then you have no true morals or faith to prove.

I sure do =)

I feel the same as MrBee.

@MrsTilly: Strictly from a numbers standpoint, I don't believe gays are better at relationships (of any kind) as opposed to any other group(s) . . . the numbers should be lower because the number of gay unions/marriage/relationship is (significantly) lower; moreover, it's a minority group to start with. Can you tell I really don't like agenda-based statistics? Especially when whether or not a group is *good* at something should be a consideration for the issue at hand (, i.e. you shouldn't have to be good at relationships to get legally married.) I hope that made sense.

I thought of two more things, after some personal reflection and reading the thread again...

My husband and I were not married by a religious institution. We got our marriage license at city hall, signed by a Justice of the Peace, who happened to be my father. I don't feel any more or less married because of how the legalities occurred, but I do wonder if some people think we're not as committed or whatever because we don't have the blessing of G-d.

Second, biologically speaking, yes, you need a man and a woman to create a baby, but you do not have to be married to do this. You don't even need sex or to know your donor. That's the flaw I find with the whole men and women become one flesh through marriage line of thinking. I wonder if people who believe this are then against any kind of reproductive assistance.

I hope we can continue the respectful dialogue, these are not meant to be criticisms of the views of any posters (I feel like I need some disclaimer language).

@looch: I agree with you and have similar questions! My husband and I didn't have a religious wedding and were married by a Justice of the Peace, but in the eyes of the State, we are just as "married" as those who have religious marriages. If someone is against gay marriage due to religious reasons, are they also against all non-religious marriages (such as mine)?

As far as reproduction is concerned - if your reason that gays shouldn't marry is because they can't have biological children, then are you also against couples marrying who choose not to have children at all? What would be the difference between a heterosexual couple marrying and not having kids vs. a homosexual couple marrying and not having kids? And what about adoption? If you think it's okay for a heterosexual couple to marry and adopt, why wouldn't it be okay for a homosexual couple to marry and adopt? Think of all the children out there who do not have homes - wouldn't it be better for them to be adopted into a loving two-parent home than not at all?

I'm trying not to address this to anyone in particular, but I'm curious if someone has a better understanding for the reasoning and can explain!

I do support gay marriage, I am a Christian and respect the beliefs of my church, however I disagree that the government should be taking this into account when making laws. I feel like it's a civil rights issue and it shouldn't be about personal beliefs it should be about what is fair for the people of this country and who lives here. I just don't think it's anyone's business who marries who or why it's a big deal to some people especially if it does not affect them personally.

If I were to have a gay child I would hope and pray that they would be able to celebrate and particiapte in the committment that they watched their parents grow up with.

@kml636: Have you read A Year of Living Biblically by AJ Jacobs? It deals with a lot of the issues you brought up. I found it quite interesting.

@lemondrop: I think the biggest threat to marriage is actually no fault divorce. It was at the time no fault divorce was implemented that the dIvorce rate hit 50%.

this thread is great and i love how no one is jumping out on everyone. We all have our opinions and there are no right or wrong (depending on your morals/views etc) I do think though that theres a difference between a religious and a civil marriage. Marriage is the definition of love and the having civil rights you wouldn't have if not married. No one is asking the church to accept to marry homosexuals, nor are we asking those who are really engrained in the church to accept it either, but think about it (not in a religious matter) which I think is what President Obama and many others are trying to shed light on.

I support it 100%.

I also wanted to stop in and say that the respectful dialogue that exists in this thread is wonderful. If only everyone could behave in such a courteous manner while discussing controversial issues!