With the holiday party season coming up I was wondering how everyone handles food allergies at parties.
The idea of going to a potluck holiday dinner with my 3yo seems so stressful.
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@Corduroy: It depends on the allergy and the family.
With my oldest, he was allergic to milk, so I just brought food for him. Certainly relatives, I knew I could trust to make safe foods, but most things we'd just avoid.
My youngest is allergic to peanuts, tree nuts, and sesame. Before every gathering, I remind everyone of his allergies and beg them not to have peanuts in any of the food. Then when we are there, I ask what's in every dish to ensure it's safe (or find out it's not - my in-laws seem to resist not throwing walnuts in every salad or bread). I also bring a couple things I know is safe for him to ensure he gets to eat.
It's definitely stressful, but it does get better. And it's really opened my eyes to who I can rely on in our family. My SIL is AMAZING at making safe foods for my kids and I LOVE her for it.
So basically: bring your own foods and watch your kid like a hawk, warn everyone not to feed your kid anything without your expressed permission, and just try to get through it! They are doable as long as you are prepared and vigilant.
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I try to use common sense. We have a peanut and egg allergy and (luckily) my daughter doesn't self serve so I can choose things that I know are safe. In my experience there is always a fruit bowl, meat, and if kids are invited something like a mac and cheese. If she wants to eat something I just ask. I don't expect people to not cook with peanuts (and she can eat baked eggs).
I guess I figure the easiest way to prepare my daughter for her future life is to teach her to figure out what she can and can't eat. I don't want to give her a false sense of security regarding other people / pot lucks -- I know that prior to having a child with an allergy I would definitely say something was "safe" that potentially wasn't because I didn't understand cross contamination.
As an aside, we were not invited to an event when my daughter's allergy was newly identified because the mom said she didn't want to stress me out. Pretty sure she didn't want to deal with worrying about it. That's legit my worst nightmare - for my daughter to be excluded.
ETA: I will say we have the luxury of she's in OIT so we don't have to worry as much about cross contamination / things being made in a factory with peanuts present, etc.
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It depends on who is hosting. I generally figure out what is safe and make him a plate. We stick to fruit, cheese, bread, and meat. I also bring food from home if I know the food won't be safe.
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My LO is still young, but recently is increasingly taking an interest in eating what others eat. He has allergies to peanut, tree nuts, and egg. So far I've just brought a little food for him, and some of the same for me so he sees I'm eating (a little of) what I'm offering him.
I also have my own set of distinct, serious food allergies, so we wouldn't expect someone to accommodate all our various allergies.
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First of all I generally feed them at home before we go so they are not too hungry. Then they can have fruit and veg and I look to see what else. If it’s pot luck I bring a main dish that they can have. And desserts are dicey so I usually keep some safe chocolate or muffins with me in case there isn’t anything they can have.
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