Hellobee Boards

Not to kid or the parent's face

My friend's little brother who is in high school said that it's acceptable for his niece to whine because she's only a baby, and that my LO is too old for that. She's 2. I'd like to meet a 2 year old that doesn't whine.

In my head I also tell my 11 year old cousin that he's a brat, but its totally the truth.

Not to the parent's face. I do tell C she's acting like a brat sometimes. I think there's a difference between someone acting like a brat and someone being a brat.

I do know a few kids that are just straight brats though.

@loveisstrange: Oh.. yea we've told G he's acting like a brat before. It always really upsets him "You shouldn't call me names... *pout*" & so we have to affirm that we don't think he's actually a brat & that's why we want him to act like HIM & not like he's acting. lol

I would NEVER say that to my child or out loud to another child. In my daughter, 99% of bratty behavior is totally due to hunger, tiredness, over stimulation. All things out of her control, that she really shouldn't be expected to respond politely to anyway. In other children I usually assume the same.

haha I have told my own children that they were acting like brats. How will they ever know how others see them if we (as parents) don't tell them? To me acting like a brat is unacceptable, no matter the reason. Do I expect my 15 month old to know that yet, nope, but I will make damn sure she knows that behaviour is not acceptable. I have no problem telling my 7 year old to "suck it up"when he is acting this way.

They will never know how other perceive them if we do not tell them!!!

Ok, what is brat behavior? I witness unsavory behavior and have been called out on it when I was kid, but using "brat" as a catch all word to describe the behavior is not helpful.

And what is the difference between telling someone they are acting like a brat and are a brat? To me it's all name calling.

I tell my niece and nephew when they are acting like brats. Their mom never disciplines them, and it's so aggravating.

@Kiki: Agreed. I think there comes a time where some behaviors are just unacceptable regardless of reason & we have to learn to control ourselves.

Those are when we remind G, "Do you see dad & I throwing fits or acting ____ way b/c we didn't get our way?.. Exactly, b/c it's not acceptable."

@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Here's Websters definition
a : child; specifically : an ill-mannered annoying child
b : an ill-mannered immature person

I think it would be hitting, whining, or tantrum because something did not go their way.

my son's favorite bratty behaviour is whining or crying because he cannot get a toy at the store. We are extremely lax on the toys, both kids have WAY more than they should so when he acts like that it makes me not want to continue that way.

Yes I always follow up with why that way bratty. Depending on how bad it was, it might be after they calm down and can think rationally again.

My 11 year old cousin is spoiled and totally disrespectful. It's definitely caused by the way he has been raised, but at his age, he knows better and can change his behavior. He has been given virtually everything he ever asks for- gaming systems at 5 years old,an iPhone at 10, he rides around on his parents riding lawn mower (NOT cutting grass) all weekend long and they pay for the gas he wastes. He also has NO responsibilities, no chores, or anything. He is completely disrespectful to adults and routinely ignores people and/or tells them to shut up. I try to talk to him and tell him why he shouldn't be acting that way, but he doesn't care. It would cause a family feud if I said anything to his parents (my mom has tried many times).

I teach 4 year olds and I expect them to respect me. I don't do well with my little cousin (who lives next door to my parents and was a "little brother" figure) being a brat. It's to the point now where I've told my family that my little boy will not be around this child unless something changes. He will not grow up thinking this behavior is acceptable.

@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Yeah, i think every human being alive has bratty moments, regardless of upbringing or parenting. You basically just said that anyone whos kids have moments of that kind of behavior are crappy parents, so thanks for that. You basically just insulted just about every parent.... ever. I think when ones child acts like that all the time, then it can be blamed on parenting.

I dont at all think that pointing out to your child when they are acting in an unacceptable manner is shunning them. The first step in correcting your own behavior is learning to recognize when its happening. I struggle with depression and that is how I control it, I recognize the thought and behavior patterns which are causing the emotions and I correct myself.

Is it something I do frequently? No. Is it something I say sometimes? Yes, it is. Do I think Im doing irreversible harm to her psyche? No. I think thats taking it a little far.

Never out loud. And honestly, I almost always give the benefit of the doubt and assume the kid is just tired or hungry. I don't think I can even name one child I know personally that is a brat. My son has his brat moments for sure, though.

@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: This has been my experience, in general. Spoiled, bratty behavior often has a lot to do with hunger, tiredness, and sometimes a lack of boundaries in their life. The first two reasons are why I always try to give them the benefit of the doubt. I know that when I'm hungry or tired it can take a lot of effort not to just start shouting at people. I've had a whole lifetime to develop the control not to do so, and I don't expect my two year old to have that, yet. But we work on it, and we try to avoid situations where we might feel that way.

I wouldn't call a kid a brat and I would be offended if anyone called my kid a brat. I just call out the specific negative behavior followed by the positive acceptable behavior.
Mrs. Lemon Lime: I get what you are saying.

Eta: in my opinion, it is like someone else calling my husband a jerk or my mom a b.