Hellobee Boards

@mediagirl: Ditto @Mamaof2: Has she seen the new school?

I would just let it be, she's expressing normal feelings. I have noticed when I try to make things better for my son, I just add to the problem.

@mediagirl: gosh, I feel like that's all you can do!

@mediagirl: also i think it helped us to acknolwedge that it was ok to be sad about it and also to be happy about it. and not to hype him up for it "you're going to LOVE IT." My old buddy Janet Lansbury says that kids can sense when you are trying to talk something up / push them to like it. Instead, just be like, "it's a change, it's ok to be excited and it's ok to be sad. We've decided this will be a good place for you"

There's a Daniel Tiger episode about how "it's ok to be sad sometimes" and working through feelings of sadness (I feel like I'm always shilling for DT, but he helps a lot in our house).

LO and I also developed this "game" for dealing with sadness. Whenever she is sad at drop-off, we each pick something on our clothes to touch which is "special" (can be anything - a button, a particular part of the design on the shirt, etc.). I told her because that is a special button/whatever, I can sense when she is touching it with my mom powers and I will think of her and send her a hug though the sky to make her feel better.

It might just be the refocusing on something tangible, but when LO started getting worked up and nearing tears, this really helps her to calm and refocus. And her teacher mentioned LO has talked about that in class, so it seems to work.

I was going to say what @winniebee said. Trying to push that it'll be great could make her feel like her feelings aren't valid or don't matter. The most important thing is exactly what she said, that you tell her it's okay to be sad. Mirroring her feelings, "you're really going to miss it, I would too" is a good tool. I use that stuff on adults all the time and it always helps. People like to be heard, no matter their age.

@Mrs. D: I like this idea! My sons old school made a book for him with photos of each kid. And he got to lead circle time his last day.

So many great ideas above!!

The one thing that always helped us with school transitions it to set up playdates with soon-to-be classmates. That really helped with my son's transition into Kindergarten!

I agree with others to let her feel her feelings. This is a good life lesson to learn too - new situations and transitions can be hard, and you can be afraid/sad, but after a while you get through it and are stronger for it. (I think JL said something like that, at least!)

@mediagirl: That's a great idea!

@mediagirl: If you have the time/interest, Connected Parenting is a spectacular book that has a lot on helping kids deal with rough times. A lot of it was things I did some already with people in my life, but it helped with knowing why it works and how to do it best. It's been the most useful book I've read for any relationship, not just as a parent (and yes, I use it with my 8mo. We acknowledge her feelings too!).

http://www.amazon.com/Connected-Parenting-Loving-Limits-Strong/dp/1583333940