We decided to combination feed this time around with our third. I’m on medications for anxiety and depression and also just wanted the extra help of other people being able to feed her. Well, she’s 2 1/2 months now and absolutely REFUSES the breast. I don’t want to wean!! I don’t want to pump 24/7!! What do I do? Any advice is so greatly appreciated.
cantaloupe / 6085 posts
Is it a new development? How long has it been going on?
blogger / nectarine / 2043 posts
Honestly, go to formula. I know it may not be the route you envisioned, but the baby will be just fine and you will be able to get the flexibility you need to take care of yourself.
kiwi / 556 posts
I'm not sure, but if I were you, I'd contact a local lactation specialist for some help. I'm sure they would have some ideas for you to help reach your goals. I know that right now most are doing virtual visits. Good luck!
ETA, how long has it been going on for? Most babies have nursing strikes at some point. If it's just been a couple days so far, try not to get worried yet, just keep offering the breast and then pump as needed to keep your supply where you want it.
persimmon / 1129 posts
@Lahela017: I agree that contacting a lactation consultant could really help. They were a huge asset to me when I was having issues. Also, if you’re on Facebook, join a local La Leche League chapter. The members on our local site are super helpful and can give recommendations for people to see.
I’m totally guessing here, but your daughter might prefer the bottle because it’s easier. I’m not sure what nipple stage you’re using, but I’d keep it at the newborn one (0 or 1). This is what our doctor recommended.
persimmon / 1483 posts
Ugh, I'm sorry! All feeding issues are so stressful. The same thing happened to me this time around. We had planned to and ended up needing to supplement a bit from the start. At the start, nursing seemed great. But then at about 3 weeks, DD had what seemed to be some bad silent reflux and got an aversion to nursing. Thankfully, she was still willing to take a bottle. Starting around 3-4 weeks, she would only nurse overnight when she's really sleepy and sometimes a bit when she first woke up. And that's still the same at almost 7 months.
I had multiple consults with 2 lactation consultants, plus a lip and tongue tie revision. Nothing helped. Once she decided she didn't want to nurse when she was alert, that was it.
Anyways, I was like you - I didn't want to drive myself crazy but I also wanted to nurse and pump what I could. It's so hard at home with multiple kids to find time to pump. I just decided that I would pump as many times a day as I could without feeling bad about how much time it was taking. I have definitely gone longer than planned between pumps just because the kids needed attention, and I'd rather give more formula than have kids feeling like I'm unavailable. It was harder when she was younger and I had to pump a lot to get my supply established, but at this point, DD is almost 7 months, and I'm pumping about every 4 hours, which for me feels totally manageable, even with 2 kids and working from home. I'm pumping somewhere between 15 and 20 ounces a day, so it still feels worth it, both just for an irrational emotional attachment to feeding her breastmilk and because financially it's helpful. One more thing to add - for me fighting her about nursing was more stressful and felt like more of an emotional rejection than just deciding to mostly pump and bottle feed. Once I took away the battle of trying to get her to nurse, I felt much better.
nectarine / 2047 posts
Check out paced bottle feeding videos on YouTube and like other suggested, use preemie or newborn nipples on the bottles. Do what’s right for you!