Hellobee Boards

We have the same issue. "No, you can't watch a show" gets "but I like [name of show here]." "I know you like it, but we're not going to watch it right now." "But I like it" -- then cue meltdown. She was 3 in December, so it's definitely the age. I just repeat and ignore the reaction and carry on with whatever I'm doing. Distraction sometimes works. "No we aren't going to watch that right now, but maybe you'd like to come and help me with X in the kitchen." Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

I've learned that if I want my LO to accept/ listen, I need to follow through with what I mean. If I say "no, you cant have another cookie" and she tantrums or flips out, I need to just stick to my guns no matter how much she flips. usually after 5 minutes or so, she will move on to something else. Now, if I am trying to get her to do something, like get dressed or brush her teeth, I use motivation- if you want to go to park you need to put on clothes, lets get dressed so we can go play!, and sometimes I make up random stories if I want her to do something lol- "I talked to your dentist today, he said you need to let mommy brush your teeth really good so you don't get a cavity. when mommy was a little girl she had a big cavity and it hurt so bad!" and I usually tell the story to distract her while I am having her do the activity she doesn't want to do

At this age, it's more effective to use words other than "no." I find that a blunt "no" gets her to escalate quickly.

I also find that the more detached and nonchalant I am with her reactions makes things easier too.

LO is 4.5 but I often use something like "asked and answered". I will say, I heard you, answered your question and because you don't like my answer doesn't mean if you keep asking I will change.

Electronics were such a struggle for us on this topic. We had to just eliminate. She's gone months now with very little electronic entertainment. The first week or so was hard on us, but now it's just no big deal.

My kids can ask why and even make a case for why they want a yes. But after that there's no more whining or persistent asking. When it becomes a problem I usually have to resort to a time out or keep away the item their asking about for longer. For mine ignoring it just makes there be more whining later.