We just moved to a new area and are trying to figure out preschool options for our 3 year old. He really thrived at his previous school and so it seems obvious that we need to enroll him somewhere. I'm just really uncertain about our options and how much I should really be worried about it ( both cost and location/convenience are issues). On one hand, any place will get him interaction with other kids, group activities and some structure. On the other hand, his teacher will probably be the most influential adult other than us, at this point in time. I want to be nonchalant about it, like he's only three, but on the other hand I feel like so much of one's personality is determined under the age of five. Thoughts?
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We just went through this (moved two months ago) but we also needed daycare. We moved from a place with two options to a place with a million options. I investigated them all and this is the process I used.
1) it would be best to keep him in the environment he is used to. So we first investigated Montessori options since that was what he was going to do. Unfortunately for us, those options were significantly too expensive.
2) looking at other options (one home preschool, play based immersion program, ymca program). The home program was great but the hours would not work for us. So that was out. The play based immersion program was great but wasn't open this summer. So YMCA program it was. It was also the cheapest option.YMCA didn't work out for us for a number of reasons (one being his speech issues and size). So we have moved him to the immersion program and I think it will be a good fit for him.
I hope my journey helps you. I think you should first investigate the program he is used to (so if he has been play based, look into play based).
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DH and I are discussing part-time pre-k for our 21 month old. While we would like him to have some time away from people he knows (he's a grandmacare baby right now), we don't see the need to rush the process either. We're going to visit a few centers and see what our option(s) are and make a final decision next month. DH and I were both raised in SAHM/nanny environments. I didn't go to school until I was five, DH four and we both feel it didn't negatively affect our future schooling and/or socialization skills detrimentally. I would consider it just because your son has been in school already, but I also wouldn't feel pressured to enroll him, just to enroll him- I'd def look at all of the pieces to make sure the fit is right for your family!
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I never went to preschool and neither did any of my five siblings. I'd like to say it didn't affect us academically?? But I also think it can be a great thing for kids too- like you said, structure, social interaction, learning rules and listening behaviors. I think that learning those types of skills tends to be more important than the curricula. I heard one K teacher say they could tell which kids were in preschool and which had not been, because the ones who were knew how to listen, sit in a circle and form lines to wait. I thought that was interesting.
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For us, it was and is very important, because our son is an only child. I do not want his first taste of following rules or getting instructions from another adult to be in kindergarten.
I also think personality plays a large part, my son is very outgoing and eager to please, he likes to be around children his own age, etc. I also happen to love the program we chose, so I feel like the fit for him is perfect.
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Disclaimer: Not an early childhood expert.
In the long run, I don't think preschool matters that much. I certainly don't think it matters too much academically when the kids are being raised in a household with engaged parents that are active in their children's learning. However, I do think it can help with social skills and learning how to sit under the authority of someone other than a parent. Necessary? No.
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In our area they have very short preschool where it's just a couple hours 2 days a week.
That's what we did with our LO1 right after I had LO2 and I thought it helped us.
I got to talk to her about all sorts of new things and figure out her likes, dislikes in a bit broader way since it was a different environment. It was also interesting to see her interact with kids her age without mommy around and we had a lot of good talks about that stuff too. So for us I felt like I learned a lot about her and she had a lot to tell me with going to preschool. -
I did not go to pre-school. We lived with my grandparents from when I was born until 4 years old. I hung out with mostly adults - grandparents, mom, the lady who lived upstairs, etc. I played with the kids next door but other than that, I didn't interact a lot with a lot of kids until I was in kindergarten. I think I had a little bit of shyness at first (I'm an introvert), but I did fine academically, was in GATE and magnet school, etc.
My brother went to a private preschool when he was 3 and seemed to do okay. He didn't have problems socially or academically either. Went to the same magnet high school I went to, although I technically did better in school than he did.
I think its a wash.
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@brownie: Thank you. That is helpful! I'm just feeling really conflicted. If money was no object I think it would be much easier to choose solely based on "fit", but alas it is.
@mrsjyw: I absolutely agree, I wouldn't enroll him "just because". I guess I am struggling because after having him home for the last three months, I can see that he is missing out on some of the different stimulation it offered.
@Mrs. Pen: If you don't mind sharing, did you have any regularly scheduled activities? or some sort of weekly structure at home? I think that with my 18 month old around, I'm having trouble focusing on more age appropriate activities for him.
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Not very, unless kids are already at a disadvantage:
http://www.hellobee.com/2013/02/25/is-preschool-a-waste-of-money/
We just enrolled our 3-year-old. I don't think it's necessary at all. Hopefully he will get used to a school setting and being away from us in that setting. But it's also about stimulation -- with a baby in the house it was harder to go on adventures. And TBH it's also a way for me to catch a break!
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@looch: Yes my son is the same, personality wise it was just great for him. That's why I'm not sure if I should settle on a program I don't love so that he still gets the overall environment, or figure out a way to keep him home with some scheduled activities or "sacrifice" (money/time) to put him somewhere more in line with what I would like.
@Weagle: @Maysprout: thanks for weighing in!
@gingerbebe: You make another great point. Since we are new here, the LOs don't have any other adult role model on a daily basis. And since DH works a gazillion hours, it's pretty much just me most of the day for most of the week.
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@Mrs. Yoyo: Thank you for the read! Fascinating! I'm pretty sure our older ones are almost exactly the same age. I put DS1 in preschool last year for that exact reason of not being able to do much with him with a baby in the house, and it was wonderful for him, and for me. Now that the little one is on one nap I can, and do, take them out every day for activities, but I feel like we stick to places that are safe for the toddler which means he's not getting stretched to his full potential (pardon the cliche).
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@Baby Boy Mom: yeah, I hear you! I am eagerly anticipating the one-nap days, but you're definitely right that outings will still be limited.
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As an elementary teacher I would highly recommend pre-school. When we were growing up the academic standards for kinder were very low. There was a lot more play time. Now, they are expected to enter Kinder knowing their alphabet, starting to read and knowing their numbers. So I personally don't feel like the "I didn't and I'm fine" is entirely accurate. Not saying that your kid wouldn't be fine, but they may have to work hard to catch up in kinder or you may have to work hard to essentially home school them. Does that make sense? But of course you need to do what's best for your family.
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I once read somewhere of a kindergarten teacher who told a parent that she can always tell which kids went to preschool.
"Oh, so the preschool kids are that much more advanced?"
"No, not at all. But they're really good at lining up to go to the bathroom."
I think that just about sums up the advantages of preschool, which to me is little more than overpriced daycare. I mean, there's nothing wrong with that, if you go into it with open eyes. But the studies all show that even the best preschools can't bump kids that much ahead academically (unless they are from broken homes or living in poverty).
Could you buy preschool curricula to do at home? Crafts, etc.? You can go as thrifty or expensive as you like when it comes to that. Personally, I like having everything laid out for me in one place, so we're going to do Timberdoodle (to justify the price, it can be re-used with other kids):
http://www.timberdoodle.com/Complete_Homeschool_Curriculum_PreK_p/999-0000.htm
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Knowing what kindergarten is now versus what it used to be when I went I am glad we went the preschool route with our kids. I don't think it is necessary but I think it is helpful. I don't think it helps that much academically (although my oldest did learn how to write his name in preschool and wanted nothing to do with me teaching him) but I think it reduces some of the culture shock of kindergarten. Then they can focus on those academic things that are now being required of them instead of figuring out the social dynamics of being in a class.
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I think preschool (at least for 4 year olds) is huge! But the biggest factor is home environment. Is LO exposed to language, books, letters, numbers at home? Is the environment stimulating? If the answer if no or maybe, preschool is definitely the critical. But it benefits all kids which is why state funded 4 yo preschool is becoming more and more common.
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@Skadi: I get where you're coming from. Since I have a background in education I would probably not use something like that but I see where it might be helpful in keeping things organized.
@travellingbee: @Mrs Green Grass: glad to have some teacher bees chime in. I didn't really clarify this, but my concern is not really academic. Yes I have a toddler distracting me, but if I put my mind to it I'm sure I could do more strictly academic preparation with DS. As it stands I feel he gets exposure to lots of life experiences since I like to keep myself interested beyond just going to playgrounds or running errands. I've been thinking more about the social aspects with the teachers and other children. E.g. do all the pros of being in school outweigh the cons of a not so great teacher? I don't know. I guess I feel like there are many facets to the decision.
@Mrs. Train: you touched upon one of the things I've been thinking about in getting used to the class dynamic. More food for thought.
@Mrs Green Grass: Also, and this might be a topic for another thread, but from what I've read, gains made from public preschool seem to have little to no effect by the time those students enter high school? (I'm still in favor of it, but it might be serving a purpose different from what it was originally intended).
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As a pre-k teacher, my answer is yes, it's important. I teach public, state funded pre-k for at-risk kids who otherwise wouldn't be able to afford preschool. These kids have a lot going on at home and definitely benefit from a stable, nurturing environment at school.
I also have taught kindergarten. Like pp have said, it's sometimes obvious which kids had attended preschool because they have more advanced social skills and understand how they are expected to behave at school. Kindergarten is also wayyy different than it was when we were kids. They are expected to know so much by the end of the year and while preschool does lay the foundation for academics (most of my pre-k students know letters/sounds/numbers and some can read by May), it also helps them not fall behind due to the social aspect. If the child isn't in for a shock when they enter kindergarten, then everyone (child, teacher, parent) is able to jump more into academics instead of taking a lot of time to adjust.
Of course, it doesn't mean kids who don't attend preschool won't be successful. I went to preschool and my sister didn't and she was valedictorian of her high school class.
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My brother went to pre-school and I didn't. I became more academic than him (he's an artist). I don't know if it has anything to do with going to pre-school or not but I sort of want to say I think it depends on the kid.
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I fall into the "not essential" camp for kids whose parents are going to seek out enriching activities anyway. However, when we were shopping for preschools, teachers were the #1 thing we looked at. The other major factor was hygiene.
I thought my son's preschool experience was generally terrific. However, like all things, the benefits of preschool came with some significant costs: tuition, illness (which also turned out to be expensive), travel time, and to be candid there were some behaviors he picked up on from peers that were less than stellar. On the positive side, he made some more friends there and I thought his teachers were good adult role models.
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@honeybear: Interesting; this is what I feel the experience will likely be for us.
@Raindrop: Agreed "it depends on the kid" is the bottom line.
@lilteacherbee: I need to gather my thoughts, but I'm going to wall you.
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I never went to preschool and was always one of the top students in my class. My stepmom did do school work and teach me things at home before I started kindergarten. I was independent and didn't have any trouble among the transition from being home all the time to going to school.
My best friend, however, also didn't go to preschool and the transition to kindergarten was really hard on her. She cried every day for weeks at drop off.
When I have a child I think I will put them in part time preschool. I'll be working and won't have as much time like my stepmother did to teach them at home.
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I think it matters the most if you are in an at-risk group as @Mrs. Yoyo: said. If you are an involved middle class or up parent, the difference is probably small. I would say it matters more to read to your kids and have experiences with them, than what type of school if any they go to.
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